Quick Appearance

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General Personality

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You wish to learn more about me? My quirks? Exactly what makes me tick? I suppose you have stumbled upon the correct place. But, listen closely for I will only spill this once and no more. I am not an open book and I would prefer to stay that way. I have found it is safer to keep things about yourself close to the vest or so I have heard others say.
I am a quiet mare. I find that listening helps me more so than just jumping in and saying a billion things when you don't know the situation. It's a horrible habit that I have found in others and I cannot quite be sure of exactly why they believe that to be true. Of course, do not take this the wrong way - I am used to being alone, though I am quite willing to hold a conversation with you. That is, of course, as long as you don't become annoying or cause the topic to turn in a direction I would wish not to speak of. Listening, though, has aided me in more ways than one. See, I am blind. So I rely on the vibrations in the ground as well as the noises my audits can pick up in order to fully keep track of my surroundings. Because of this I am afraid of storms. Thunder not only blocks a lot of noise from my ears but it rumbles and shakes the ground so much that it's hard for me to keep my balance.
I am an intelligent mare, inquisitive some might say. I like to take my time on making decisions. I like to think about all of the options and only then will I spurt out my opinion on the matter. I do not do things rashly and I also do not make any judgments that are not deserved. I am also instinctive, though, and will go with things that my gut dares tell me is the best way. My decisions are made as a combination of both and I can highly doubt that will ever change. This instinct also pushes me to help others. I'm so caring that I don't care if I'm the one that gets injured, I will help someone who needs it.
My past has given me some leadership abilities, though I would never wish to do so with an iron fist. I offer help in hopes that I will get the help in the future when and if it is necessary. That past, though, has also made me very troubled. I used to be immortal, though upon running across this land I found out that something has changed. I am no longer immortal. The thousands of years I have lived with my red hawk companion are still there but I know that I will now age as a normal horse would. But the memories don't leave. I've got the sounds and screams of the wars past stuck in my head. The feeling of blood sticking to my pelt. I can never get rid of those. Because of these memories and the fact that I really only want to help people I have an unspoken temper. I attempt to hide the fact that I'm getting angry. I don't show it much. But when I do, it's because I've let myself blow. And, really, I am not one you would wish to be around if I do.

Relatives

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Before Helovia

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My history is something I would prefer not to go into. And there is really too much for me to be going into a major amount of detail with. So hopefully this will be short and sweet but give you just enough to understand where I am coming from.
I'm not sure how long it was after I was born, but I believe I was about two years old. My father was killed attempting to save my mother from a stallion who was trying to take over our herd. My mother died not too long after. I found her dead beside a stream, and some have told me that fate saved me from those horrible images of blood coating the ground and running into the water by having me be born blind. From the age of two on I was orphaned and I had absolutely no family left.
It was quite a few years later. Like. A couple hundred when I finally got into a relationship. I had gained the immortality at age four and stayed that age in appearance and physicality since. This relationship which I was in was highly abusive. In fact, the stag I was with led to me having a miscarriage from the beating and I endured ontop of the emotional abuse. I was left alone after the miscarriage, him leaving me one morning with no rhyme or reason - not even a goodbye.
The time in between Scath and Taj (who will be explained later) was much of a blur. I recall bickering with my hawk about attempting to find a path in life. I was weak. I had fallen into a thick rut. Getting out of it was a lot more difficult than I had understood. It wasn't too long, I don't think, before I had stumbled across a stag by the name of Apodis. He seemed to have a presence I would associate with a bodyguard. And, he had come about during the time when talk of war began to lace the air with such a poisonous feel. He saved me more times than he realized. Once when I had almost drowned, slipping into a rushing torrent of water. But, a few other times when I had given up on continuing on. It was obvious my land was to be taken over. I found no use in staying alive and torturing myself through it. Apodis. He kept me moving. I can't thank him enough for that.
I thought I was going to be alone forever, then I met a stag by the name of Taj. I didn't think I would fall for him, but I did. And I was pregnant by the time the second war started. My land was the only one left as a safe haven, and unfortunately we failed. I became a prisoner of war and had my child while being held captive. I managed to break myself free with my child. But, in the process of running we got separated. I can only hope that he is with Taj now and is safe. That is when I stumbled across the land, and upon crossing the border felt a weird shock and jolt, as if I had been stripped of my immortality. My companion, a red hawk, was disconnected from me and I realized then that I was truly alone