[O] half of me has gone away (any god) - Printable Version +- HELOVIA || The Way to the Sun (http://helovia.com) +-- Forum: Out of Character (http://helovia.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=1) +--- Forum: Archives (http://helovia.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=11) +---- Forum: Veins of the Gods Archive (http://helovia.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=49) +---- Thread: [O] half of me has gone away (any god) (/showthread.php?tid=21493) |
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half of me has gone away (any god) - Elsa - 11-10-2015 Elsa, Feel lucky for what you have, when you have it. Happily ever after doesn’t mean happy forever. The decision. It had been lingering in the back of her mind but she never thought she would get the guts to go back after her come to Jesus meeting with the God of Earth. To ask for this gift anyways seemed stupid, if only she had been stronger in the first place she wouldn’t be in this situation. Edgar, fortunately, gave some legitimate advice. On one hand, the scar had made her stronger. She had learned to take things for stride, and to be respectful. Even if the wound was no fault of her own, she had gained to respect for those who had disabilities. Rasta was a mare she had met who was completely blind, and Elsa couldn’t even imagine. One eye missing was already hard enough. She debated over this for a few nights, listening to the whispers of the wind as if it would help. Should she play roulette at the Veins? What if they sent her away? That would tear away at her confidence she was slowly gaining back. Edgar prodded in the back of her mind, offering his support. The problem wasn’t if she wanted the eye back, because she always had. But if she got it back, would it change her? Would it ruin her morals? It was as if getting the eye back was a sin, and all that sight would do was double the amount of horrors she encountered. But yet it would allow her to experience double the joy. She could fully see the frolicking, and the full painting of life that was presented before her. There was a possibility that all along she had been trapped on the dark side of the painting. Maybe she was staring at Icarus and it was time to move on from him. With a determined huff she flew off. Even Edgar was unprepared for her flight. By the time she was working her way to the veins, Edgar had barely gotten off the branch. To Edgar, she seemed to move faster and faster. He could feel her heart rate accelerating the closer that they got. He sincerely hoped the Gods were in a good mood. If not, he’d have to kick some ascended god ass. Even if it costed him his life, he needed to emotionally shield the woman he followed. As the pair hit the ground, Elsa huffed nervously. Edgar landed atop her head, sitting rigid and aware. There was no telling how this interaction would go, or even which god would come. Heck, they may not come at all. Tentatively Elsa stepped forward, and declared her want. ”I come seeking my sight.” Then she fell quiet. Please listen… @Mythical Request Elsa comes looking for her sight, using VoTG from my prize list. :) "talk" RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - God of the Earth - 11-17-2015
RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - Elsa - 11-18-2015 Elsa, Feel lucky for what you have, when you have it. Happily ever after doesn’t mean happy forever. He formed. The one she was most nervous about rose from the cracked monument. Soon his huge hulking form stood before her. She cast her gaze down, even in the wake of his small compliment. She had been rude to him, an embarrassment to herself as she succumbed to her anger and sadness. Edgar rubbed his head encouragingly against her poll, cooing softly and reminding her that he was here. If anything was wrong, he began, he would take down the God of Earth. Elsa smirked a little at his confidence. For such a small bird he was courageous. But his question was one she had not expected. Usually it was a small simple quest, and now he wanted to know what she had learnt in her days of darkness. Elsa’s head dipped a little lower to the ground as she tried to put together a coherent idea. There were so many things that had happened. The good, the bad, and the ugly all showed up in the course of this little adventure. Would he deny her sight, because she had become better without it? Her face heated, and her body suddenly felt as if it was on fire. ”That I am driven by my emotions.” That was the best way to sum it up. Without her sight she relied more heavily on her inside to do the observations. ”I’ve learned that life is complicated, and sometimes it hurts… Fuck, she could feel the tears lurking behind her eyes. ’It okay.’ Edgar assured, pressing her to continue. ”Love sucks but at the same time it’s such a wonderful thing. It’s a high that is so addicting that it feels like a part of you goes missing when the love leaves.” Her lips trembled, trying to force the thoughts of Oxy into the back of her head. She had tried to lock him up there, but now he was banging against the walls of his prison. She needed to let go of him. ”But that sometimes the fruit of that love can heal you, and you need to keep fighting to bring them together.” Shida and Auriel, how she had failed. But she would never stop looking. Even if they had left Helovia, she would find them. ”Seeing only half the world is frustrating. I feel like I miss out on so much because I am incapable of being perfect. How am I supposed to be a general when I can hardly tell what’s going on with one good eye? Will two actually help me, or will I only be more confused…” The question was spinning out of control. She could hardly keep on the topic that the hulking giant in front of her wanted. ”I learned that selflessness is just as damaging as it is helpful.” Trying to keep everyone happy and satisfied was hard. Just look at her now, she had raggedly cut hair and the bruise on the left side of her face was turning an ugly yellow color as it tried to heal. ”I need to let go of the little things. If I make a mistake, I should just move on. Everyone else ends up forgetting it. So why is it so hard for me to forget it? It’s like I have a little tally board on the inside of my mind that is meant to keep track of my mistakes.” She sighed, the tears slowly leaking from her face and running down her face. With another inhale then, she turned her attention to the God, finally looking him in the eye. Was that what he wanted? ”I’ve learned that learning sometimes sucks.” She feigned a small laugh, a smile cracking the darkness she had been exuding. @Mythical Request "talk" RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - God of the Earth - 11-23-2015
RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - Elsa - 11-24-2015 Elsa, Feel lucky for what you have, when you have it. Happily ever after doesn’t mean happy forever. He didn’t hate her quite yet, which was a step in the right direction. Though the question he proposed had her mind reeling. What did he want Elsa to say? In her mind, they are still a Pegasus, physically. Mentally, they are lost, broken, always yearning to fly. Are they as effective? No. It’s like a flightless bird, although they may be helped, they will never be able to migrate. They will be grounded in one place unless they can get carried. And in the ways of carrying, Elsa was positive no one would have the want to do that. Right now she was picking herself up by her own belt loops, and she didn’t know how much longer she could hold it. Edgar too was puzzled. His head fell forward so that the top of his head was squished to Elsa’s poll. His mind was yearning and churning for a solid answer, and it was driving him absolutely insane. He groaned, finally giving up and freezing in his embarrassment in a face plant atop her head. If they weren’t in the presence of a God, she’d just as quickly shake him off and watch him plop to the ground in a pile of feathers. She had yet to answer as she stood in silence, eyes gazing around as if she’d be able to find the right answer. Somehow, she had an inkling that Mr. Earth over there covered up all the posters before the test. Damn, he was an asshole sometime. ”I feel like you want me to say that they are still a Pegasus, and I can agree, that physically, yes, they are still a Pegasus.” She paused for a moment, formulating a way to continue this conversation. ”But mentally, it’s so hard to believe you are. You can’t fly, and you watch others soar above you. Granted, you can do great things on the ground, but it’s not the same. If a herd of Pegasus decide to migrate over a sea, what happens to boy that lacks a wing? Either he’d have to beg someone to find a way to help, or go on his own way.” Her body exhaled a long breath, taking to looking at him again. ”I don’t want to have to beg for help. I want to be able to do it on my own. I…” What did she want to say? So many thing came to mind, but he couldn’t be bothered with a novel of her reasoning for the way she acted. She’d never be the strongest physically, or mentally. While she could excel in one, the other she was barely making a passing grade. The change couldn’t just happen overnight, if that is what he was alluding to. ”I don’t know what I’m missing. Maybe that’s my problem. Sure, I can see physically a bit, but internally I am literally blind. I don’t know what direction to step in. The small steps I have taken before only led me into a pit of spikes, and despair. I don’t want to do that again.” She sounded like a pleading child again. In the world of happiness, sadness and gratitude, she was blind, arms outstretched, and unmoving. She didn’t want to risk it anymore, she needed someone to guide her out. That was the main reason her pride and emotions faltered, because when she realized she needed help, she rejected herself. Edgar, still in a face palm, finally peeked up his head. He bobbed his head silently in agreement. He glanced downward, eyeing his bonded with suspicion. She never like speaking of her feelings to him, and especially hated talking to strangers about it. The only time she did was in a time of intense emotion, and desperation. So why did the God suddenly prod her to speak her inner workings? Was he trying to make her undergo an emotional transformation? Did he not realize she had already accomplished so much? Part of him growled inwardly, wanting to scream to the God that she understood. The Earth didn’t see Elsa like he did. He didn’t know that in her heart she was dying. Dying to change, dying to help, and dying to feel. And sometimes, that had her dying to die. She was trying so hard to hang on, and she had made leaps and bounds toward happiness. She went from contemplating death to actually wanting to see another day. Her reckless abandon fell, and now she sympathized with nearly everyone. She began to love without abandon again, and in a way, that worried Edgar. He fervently hoped the God would not drive her back into a state of darkness. @Mythical Request "talk" RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - Blu - 01-03-2016 unarchived per request RE: half of me has gone away (any god) - God of the Earth - 01-03-2016
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