x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Printable Version +- HELOVIA || The Way to the Sun (http://helovia.com) +-- Forum: Out of Character (http://helovia.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=1) +--- Forum: Archives (http://helovia.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=11) +--- Thread: x THOSE OCEAN EYES (/showthread.php?tid=25457) |
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x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Nayati - 10-18-2016 "Oh, Rathunax, don't go too far ahead!" risen in such a way the dulcet tones garner a slight rasp, drenched in worry and anxiety. The closer the crimson tarragon advanced on their destination the more the skies seemed to open up for his presence. Sweet dove, lost soul — emotional compromise disallows her to follow suit. All that turbulent mind can muster goes as ‘Here again.’ Neither foreboding nor welcoming though it settles in the bottomless pit of the mind’s proverbial belly like settling dust. Utterly fascinating what the prefix of time does to the world. A turntable perinola but the game never ends in lackluster repetition with the sole realization that, in the end, there is only one lone survivor (a lone pillar) in the middle. The primordial venture into the foreign lands — a forced exploration — promoted by the rejection of a tremulous mother figure. Broken reminders sticking with her like a sick shadow. To have the same creature meant to adore and cherish become the boogeyman that plagues one’s sleep. Oh, that is a bone-deep betrayal. Battered and raw mentally and physically, the spectral reminders of her youth were immortal. Such life lessons are never easy to consign to oblivion. Demure as a hare on a hair-trigger for escaping the mottled castaway had descended on the doorsteps of these lands as unjust banishment. Tear-streaked, broken, only to be welcomed into the warm arms of safe haven. Bereavement trailed behind her with hands held behind it’s back in wait ; no one spared the already broken the feel of loss. Inevitable, eventual, albeit the impact still slammed into the recipient like an angry bull. No outrunning it and the paper tiger of a mare must certainly could not hide. Lessons learned by the rough hand of life. Reasonably the uncertainty in the terms of absence of those she had adored with full heart bursting with the fence parting permanence to wanderlust garnered a plausible train of thought. The particular individuals that took broken doves beneath their wings to tended them until they took flight. Yeah, well Nayati was still waiting on that moment. To look upon unfamiliar lands and proclaim them home — the task was never difficult. No homestead awaited in the vast distance. Self-reproach ( a familiar friend of hers) festers somewhere dark for the windstorm departure she has taken in an attempt to put the new found confidence to use in the outside world. Rathunax as a patron saint, the gentle cherub’s steadfast ally, still there was not enough strength in attendance to stomach the possible (and likely) kick in teeth in direct correlation of facing an estranged mother. Gods proof that she had tried to consummate the steel in her spine to get the inquisitive pondering that spun like a wash-cycle in a tireless mind answered. For simple closure. Persecuted in unfamiliar territory for rationale unknown — it is no wonder the anguish settled deep in sun bleached bones. A dark presence full of cynicism and persistent self-preservative one-sided conversations. For all the good Helovia shone upon her, the dark voice of misanthropy lingered on invincible and fed to gluttony. Ah, but the vermilion-eyed nymph questioned everyone these days. The never-ending wonder if whoever she encountered would hurt her, betray her, lie to her, or worst of all : leave her. A turbulent stream of rapid-fire questions that crept up in the silence at the most inopportune of moments. All the soft smiles and gentle, encouraging words fell flat when thrown back in praise toward her own person. To know this and still be unable to curb such instinctual rebuttal of positive praise but innately seek it? Oh, but it wears on the soul. In the harsh night a promise whispered to the skies that no one would ever cast her aside or harm her again only made her a foolish girl. How could one possibly stop the world from simply being as it always had been? Such optimism, she craves it, but her life has not given her the liberty to freely go about it even with her being as gentle as she is to the core. As vibrant as a glorious, sunny day. Rathunax's puerile words of disappointment hold a weight that causes her to glance up at a sky she has ignored due to her own turbulent musing. A heavy shadow casts overhead and shelters the light further dampening her mood. Nayati rather likes the brightest views of the sun and moon (and it would seem Rathunax has taken the same preferences). She cannot count the stars blanketing the indigo skies in this kind of weather, however, and it causes her to harrumph quietly to herself. Hoof falls creep to still and the dark rim of a tinted muzzle tilts to rise at the scattered openings of the murky sky. The gifts bestowed, intertwined in her pale mane, twinkle with the movement ; beneath her presents a bountiful bouquet of radiant flora. 'Home now?' Rathunax prods and his deep red hide appears as hovering just above her tilted head, excitement dancing in those ruby eyes. Nayati can only curve her lips as his enthusiasm is quite alive through their bond. It is also contagious. "Yes." she answers him quietly, laughing softly at the quick, wild twirls he attempts mid-air. For all of Nayati's melancholy, the spitfire dragon has been more than happy enough for the both of them in her attempted travels. Now, she wondered if the nervousness, starting to swirl in the pit of her belly coming alive like the soft flutter of wings, would be the single entity to break her. Back here there was always the looming threat of abnegation but this place held the dagger to her demise : because if not here where else was there for her? RE: x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Vadim - 10-18-2016
@Nayati RE: x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Nayati - 10-18-2016 Reluctance burdens the end of her fruitless sky-gazing — the fickle stars have never been more important than in that moment. One false move from panic-stricken and the energy coursing through warm veins beats electric. There is no telling just how amplified this feeling would be had she actually mustered the conscience to venture away from safety. Apprehension made a settled decision a conflict that disrupted the entire essence of her being. The innate codependency attached as familiarly as one’s name clung hard-fast which furthered the time in solitude, hidden away. Strength eluded her in the face of her boogeyman but in these lands in the time spent she could still grow a good enough facade to survive. This world ate the weak of mind and spirit — it had gorged on her misfortune enough. All in good faith it had been. She had even fed the ludicrous fantasy of being welcomed to a mother’s embrace full of sorrow and regret for the transgressions forced on a young child. Even knowing just how disdainful mortal creatures could be simply out of fault, there still lived the ghost of a child that wanted her mother. No matter where she presented a forgettable presence (or so the believed) ; longing burned deep for longevity and the adoration of true family, friends. ‘Lets go, go, go.’ Rathuanx’s chanting intonation resonates quite forcefully. Reverie broken in the classical distraction method she now identifies with her spirited convoy. Cardinal light of her gaze trails wistfully from the vast open of the nature around her, flicking in it’s direction to settle on the exuberant presence of the hovering wyvern. She mulls over the truth behind his persistence : they have nowhere to go, not really. In the pointless self-inflicted absence associations and previous connections could have snapped — broken — with her lack of communication prior to. Oh, but aren’t you a selfish little hypocrite? One might feel better if it were not her own voice spitting venom in her own eye. Over one softly spotted shoulder a longing expression settles on her morose features because it would be so easy to just turn back and not face anything surely coming her way. The world around them comes alive abruptly where there was melancholy there is a live wire of energy. Rathuanx’s sudden alertness distracts the hounding urge pulling longing sanguine eyes away, swinging back to the sights before her, the nervous energy rebounding. Out of habit or fear she does not know but those eyes flick from one edge to the next and her body tenses in preparation to flee. Not so strong that a warrior's heart suddenly encased itself in her chest cavity. Aerodynamic wings slice through the air in rapid concession but Rathuanx's emotions are not protective nor wary ; it causes pause as the realization of such. The scarlet tarragon is excited. 'ADIM' bounces around in her head in the high screech of the dragon's enthusiasm as he pitches forth with little delay. "Wait - oh!" Cut off from a worried rebuttal comes her expressed surprise as her eyes flick down to ground level : just as a beast with a trioka of fierce heads comes barreling forth. A split second colors Nayati fearful for she has been absent just long enough to have placed the knowledge of the normally gentle creature on the back burner of her thoughts. Serenity morphs her face and those eyes alight because it is simply how Nayati functions. She is her own worse enemy left to her own devices, but there is always warmth in her for others. Soft smile tips her lips upward, amused as well as truly joyful, as Vlasi balances herself on her hind limbs in excitement. "Well hello, Vlasi. Oh, but aren't you a sight for sore eyes!" she croons with dulcet tones, warmth saturating each word. 'LOOK AYA ADIM!' And it is as if a cold bucket of water has been poured overhead, drenching her in the harsh reality. It is a true pain to her chest and she has to remind herself to take deep breaths on the impending presence that she knows is not far behind his near dancing companion. Of course, Vlasi would not be here if Vadim were not near ; her own absent-mindedness comes to bite her in the hide. Having been so immensely caught up in the mere sight of the sweet Rougarou she had come to adore over time, the thought had swept away with the emotion — now she was stuck. What does one say to someone she had abandoned for her own selfish purposes? Someone who had at the very least earned the right to have been told before hand that she was going to attempt such a venture. Those questions go unanswered as life forces Nayati to face yet another trial. Hair askew as if he has rushed to present himself (but that can't be right) and she wonders if his quick appearance was to tell her to get away from Vlasi. Oh, it would hurt but she would understand. She is practically a stranger now. Here he is as she has remembered him finding her torn between being quite happy he is healthy and still here and cursing being forced to face him right now. Words escape her as her mouth opens and closes like a grounded fish — speechless with so much to say — but it seems her eyes want to soak him up, take him in, because the cynic in her believes there will be no good from whatever transpires. The gentleness of which he utters her name makes her cringe internally — a proverbial nail in coffin of her tumultuous guilt — and all she can do is stare, near-suffocating frozen in the vice grip of his stare — a meeting of two warring emotions. "Hi, Vadim." comes choked in a tone so low and regretful it is a wonder if he has heard it at all with the passing wind. Rathunax's particularly sharp claws settle on the ridge of her back and she knows he is trying to soothe her by settling close. He literally has her back and, though it has been funny in the past, she has never appreciated his literal acknowledgement of the terms until now. Just how many more familiar faces would she run across before she was truly ready? @Vadim RE: x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Vadim - 10-19-2016
@Nayati RE: x THOSE OCEAN EYES - Nayati - 10-22-2016 Gracelessly the two confidant stare into eyes on either side of the spectrum and it is of wariness that hinders a response from ashen mouth. All plans of confrontational avoidance, a laughable ambition in retrospect, flew out the proverbial window like a caged bird. Neurotic energy leaks from the soft flesh of her and the balancing calm that radiates through she and her crimson compatriot threatens to either tip or ease the balance of her emotions. She is sensitive and her mind turbulent for, in her cynicism (in her historical knowledge of mortal beings), she worries of the multitude of directions such a re-connection may take. All at once in the blurred, distracted length of her vision he moves and it is by the strength of gritted teeth that she forces herself to remain solid. Forces herself to trust in her retained knowledge of the persona of her friend that harm will not befoul her. No, he did not gnash his teeth like the wolves of the lands read to feast upon a doe-eyed lost soul like herself. Nayati could seek solace in that simple fact. Her bleeding heart beat in a heavy staccato rhythm with each excruciating second that passed between them ; when skin blessed skin, she could not contain the reflexive flinch of the muscle beneath. Pinched behind pale lashes as they kiss her high cheeks and soak in the warmth of his exploratory affection, she misses his eyes as the disbelieving words come retched from his rich timbre. As disbelieving as she is that this cannot (will not) turn sour at some point. Things always do as she has learned time after time. The chill of the air slips slender fingers between them as the space is once again settled with his retraction. It is with grand reluctance that those Merlot eyes present themselves because there is no hiding from this conversation. Reunions with a cruel mother on the puerile expectation that time had changed one’s soul may have been far beyond her reach but this was not. This she could do or, at least, this is the conversation she internally has with herself. Grandiose idealism's based on some new-found hearsay of a granule of confidence, really. The soft words concerning her ill-fated absence resonate sincerely through a quiet utterance and the tender soul dares a small smile. Of relief or at the quick addition of his charming companion lives on a thin line. Still, she is happy in this singular moment because just maybe things will not become another sorrowful notation on the pages of her history. "I -, " she pauses on a self-conscious notion. A tug from their bond, a push, comes forth as Rathuanx’s persuasion. He is keen on being important to her (the only necessary man in her life) but in the same breath he is nothing if not supportive of her own connections with others. It does not take words to understand that he wishes her to speak her mind that, with his presence at her weak point, she has nothing to fear. A light clearing of her throat conjures up a sparking of garnered confidence ; ruby eyes settle on his clear blues. “"I missed you too and Rathunax" ” she can feel the dragon's potent snort in her mind but he cannot fault her for trying and her lips twitch from the humor of it. a glance and a smile at his eager companion as she dips her head close enough to nose the middle of her troika of heads gently. “"And you as well, Vlasi. " It is quite easy to speak such words to the welcoming rougarou. There is not the same sense of dread that come with others. Disquiet saturates his words though she is not sure if it is her own making them this way or his feelings seeping into the syllables. "Huh?" and her lightly speckled head raises in faint alarm. “" Of course, Vadim. I would never not tell you something like that immediately. " ” it is an assurance that hangs on a tightrope of complications. Ones that fell in the line of implication that she could be forthright in that aspect, but not in her impulsive disappearance. A frown mars her lips and now it is worry in her eyes that cause them to focus on him even more. The mind tells tall tales ; she now wonders if he has been fretting over this the entire time. Nayati, being of kind soul, cannot stomach causing someone else such discomforting troubles. In the pause of her pondering mind come words that rip her right from her reverie. There are no ceremonious horns sounding to flourish their time-hindered reunion ; the silence weeps between them in the absence of her response. Then like fragile glass it cracks and shatters, pooling beneath her like the softly colored flora — she had believed herself a terrible person in her absence but in this moment she knows she is one. "i'm so sorry " she whispers, heavy words buried low in remorse. The abandoned had become the abandoner, she had left him and many others, and with no idea of the troubles they have had to face it only further disturbs her. @Vadim |