the Rift


Ave Maria [ Locket Teaching Spar]
Ascended Helovian

Gaucho The Wildfire Posts: 1,004
Deceased atk: 8.5 | def: 11.5 | dam: 8
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17.2 :: 12 HP: 85 | Buff: PINNACLE
Mara :: Black Mamba Snake :: Paralyze & Vorsa :: Plain Zephyr :: Phoenix Odd
#1


Seasons ago, Gaucho had flown this very path, under very different circumstances. Previously, he had been accompanied by Kri, Midas, and Aryel....and their purpose, had been to force the Foothills out of their home, to make way for the Grey. The Grey it seemed, had disbanded and were now simply the Foothills...funny how even when things change, the ultimately stay the same. Perhaps this time would be no different - this time he would again defeat the Foothills - a member of it anyways, and go back home, having learned nothing knew. He came here though, secretly, for Sohalia. The Throat had discussed what to make of the Foothills, given that they had attacked the Edge, and their fate was currently being decided. One of Soh's friends however, the sparkly one he had met once, resides within the Foothills...if the Foothills became an enemy, what would happen to the sparkly one? Could she remain friends with Sohalia? Or would the ties of policy break them a part?

Well, the herd could discuss all they liked about whether the Foothills were worthy; Gaucho had another assessment. He would fight one of them. Sure, the Foothills had only attacked the Edge due to a contract they held, but if they were weak as well as foolish in their negotiations, then they would not earn his respect.

Landing with an odd elegance upon a grassy knoll just outside of the Foothills, Gaucho reared up - his wings beating and his jaws wide, allowing a bellowing call to echo outwards.

"Show me you are not weak!" He challenged loudly, landing with a dull thud upon the grasses. His antlered brow was lowered slightly as his gaze surveyed the area. One would come; one would meet his challenge, he was sure of it.

[ Sorry this took me so long, Dark!

@[Locket] . Gaucho is standing just outside of the Foothills. Although he's contemplating their alliance, nothing actually rides on this spar - it's just his motivation for coming here. You can attack first! As this is a teaching spar, I'll post OOC notes after each of your posts. You can then re-post based on the suggests if you wish. ]






Image Credits
Please tag me in every post! Magic/Force is allowed on Gaucho at any time.


Locket Posts: 74
Up For Adoption atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 15.2hh :: 7 HP: 60.5 | Buff: NOVICE
Teppei :: Giant Panda :: Stormcall Adoptable
#2

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all
But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall

It was simple, the stallion's mind. His thoughts only pertained of three things, now four with the recent meeting of a stunning lady. Patrols, companion, more patrols, and now, Lakota. All else was unimportant to the stallion. His mind was normally blank until a few days ago, in which he met the beautiful healer, Lakota, up close and personal. Yes, he had seen her here and there, but now it was something more than a simple, I'm-in-your-herd relationship. Something had grown deeper between the two, and Locket was pleased about it. After his spar with Solace she had healed him, and that was when they had bonded. At that moment, when they parted ways, Locket hoped to injure himself enough to speak with her again. It was a funny thing that he's so brave until it came to women, which he then grew timid.

Inhaling the Orangemoon air as he walks with a casual pace, his emerald gems flicker to a shadow looming across the border. Muscles tense as a call rings out, one that carries forward in the wind. Pale lobes are ushered back, flattened against his skull. A cloven hoof is raised, struck against the ground. He paws at the earth, chest puffed slightly as he then thrusts himself forward, bellowing words of his own. "A fight you want, a fight you get!" Tucking in his head, he launches at the larger pegasus stallion. His hooves touch the ground just before he reaches the stallion. Running the rest of the way, he pulls his weight to the right side, blade atop his brow cocked and ready. He desires to drag it along the bay skin of the stallion, the one who dares challenge them. Although he was massive compared to Locket, he did not care. He would not cower in the shadow of this stallion.

Whipping around, Locket lets out a heavy snort, pale nostrils flared. His back hooves are suddenly ensnared in his mess of dark locks, frustration growing within him. He bucks as an outcome, pulling strands of hair from his tail. Despite the pain he charges again at the stallion, forelock falling before his eyes. Tossing his head, he bares his teeth and nips at what is closest to him. Last he checked, the stallion's quarters were closest. With instincts throwing him around, Locket swerves off to the side, still thinking he's facing the buttocks of his opponent. He couldn't risk getting smacked in the jaw by those muscular legs. Locket throws his head about to keep his forelock clear of his line of vision, emeralds darting about to find the enemy.

"talk talk talk"
[icky post :I
attack: 1/3(??)
word count: 445
tags: @[Gaucho]

xjrlokix.flickr

Locket talk :: L = R
Ascended Helovian

Gaucho The Wildfire Posts: 1,004
Deceased atk: 8.5 | def: 11.5 | dam: 8
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17.2 :: 12 HP: 85 | Buff: PINNACLE
Mara :: Black Mamba Snake :: Paralyze & Vorsa :: Plain Zephyr :: Phoenix Odd
#3

They never make him wait long, do they? Perhaps others, but never Gaucho. There is always someone to answer his call - to rise to his challenge. With each new partner, Gaucho always faintly feels the pull of the unknown, that perhaps today he will meet an opponent like Archibald; one who can bring him to his knees. Will it be this masked warrior? This one, lithe of build and surely quick on his feet? He answered the call immediately, but does he know what he's in for?

Gaucho's stormy gaze washed over the lithe warrior, in the moments before he charged. Yewwneekorn, he thought to himself. He had fought many, and while their horns could be problematic, the dun had learned many tricks to defy and defeat their natural spears. He had antlers - large with numerous tines upon them to deflect and ensnare the horn of a unicorn, and now, as Locket raced towards him, that's just what he planned to do.

Gaucho lowered his brow slightly, so that his antlers were pointed horizontal, but also to compensate for the smaller stature of his opponent. Otherwise, he remained still; letting the impulsiveness of his opponent bring him closer, so that he would not have to waste precious energy.

As Locket neared, swerving to the right, the dun finally burst into action. Protecting his face and neck with his lowered antlers, Gaucho threw his own body to the left, towards Locket. Although purposefully allowing himself to take damage early in a spar was perhaps not advisable, he had told the warrior to prove that he was not weak. In that, Gaucho would not dance away from him. He wanted to see what the Foothills were made out of, and in turn, they would learn about him as well. Gaucho's intention was to thrust the collar of spikes that rested upon his shoulders, into his opponent's left shoulder as he passed. If he wanted to get close enough to use his horn - Gaucho would let him, but at a price. As he threw his weight over, he felt the white-hot tear of skin, as Locket's curved blade thinly parted the skin over his ribcage. Gaucho's dark ears immediately pinned against his skull as the itchy-burning feeling of the cut found its way to his brain. It was not deep, but like a paper-cut,it stung with each twist of his barrel.

Through his peripheral vision, Gaucho could see the stallion spinning behind him, and...bucking? What on earth was he doing? Gaucho was right here - did he get stung by a bee? However the dun made no move to question the unicorn - it may all be some kind of ploy to get him to let his guard down. Indeed, that might have been it, for the stallion was on the move again.

Fool, Gaucho thought with a hardened grin, as he watched the stallion near his hindquarters. Did Locket perhaps think that simply because he was currently still, that he would remain so? Gaucho tried to restrain himself until he judged that Locket would not be able to completely swerve to avoid what was coming. Lowering his head, Gaucho bucked towards the outstretched muzzle of the stallion. His intention was to kick him squarely in the face as he tried to bite at his large hindquarter.

As his hooves once again struck the ground, Gaucho dropped his right shoulder, moving forward and turning in to the right. His stormy gaze sought out the lithe form of his opponent, and locked on. With a loud grunt, Gaucho launched himself forward towards Locket's left shoulder. He lowered his antlers defensively, to protect against a potential horn-retaliation from the smaller stallion. He meant to once again slam himself against Locket - this time, with his right shoulder, against Locket's left rib cage, or shoulder. While Gaucho's considerable bulk and force would likely causing bruising, it was once again his spiked collar that was the real worry.




[ WC: 666
Attack 1/3

@[Locket] .


OOC Notes
REALLY good intro. I like the emotion about Lakota, and how he wants to get himself injured so that he can see her more. Hilarious! Here are a few things I would suggest you could improve upon (feel free to edit your previous post, or just continue. Whatever you want :3)
  • So Locket's first attack is to run head on at Gaucho, and try to drag his horn against him. The first thing I would suggest, is to mention which side you're talking about. If you're running at him, and moved to the right, then it's Gaucho's left side you're attacking. Also, where are you aiming for? His neck? His shoulder? His flanks? Hip? Wing? I took it as rib cage, since you didn't specify.
  • Second attack, Locket turns around (bucks at his own tail, lmao), then runs at Gaucho again trying to bite his hind quarters - again, which side?

I would also suggest using more of your post count. I almost always think 'eh, I won't need 800 words', and I always do. Maybe Locket is thinking/hoping that Lakota will be around to see him beat up the stallion? Does he recognize him from any of the invasions? What does he think of how primitive Gaucho looks? Maybe he'll compare him to Solace in his mind, because they're both larger breeds, and Locket can once again use his speed to his advantage? All of these things, will make the spar more vivid to read.


Image Credits
Please tag me in every post! Magic/Force is allowed on Gaucho at any time.


Locket Posts: 74
Up For Adoption atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 15.2hh :: 7 HP: 60.5 | Buff: NOVICE
Teppei :: Giant Panda :: Stormcall Adoptable
#4

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all
But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall

Up close he can gaze at the brutish appearance of the stallion, green eyes sweeping over the muscular body. He was a bulky stallion, built for war as his body was heavily lined with muscle. Locket envisions his fight with Solace once again, the bulky stallion was slower, less agile unlike Locket, who had both of those skills on his side. However, blows from the hooves were something Locket didn't want to take, because this stallion looked dangerous with those, just as Solace was. Larger stallions always have harder blows, while Locket was that poor nerd trying to fight the bullies to get back his lunch money. His blows were weak, but the cloven hooves gave him a small advantage. He knew how horrible it was to come in contact with cloven hooves, they were sharp, pointed, dangerous. His eyes rise to the antlers on the man's head, pale lobes flat against his skull. This stallion would prove trouble with those, he could easily entangle his legs or his own horn in the rack, proving trouble for them both.

As the rusty warrior charges, the bay readies for him. He lowers his rack, preparing to catch his blows. It seems like he runs miles before he actually reaches the stallion, sweat already forming at his neck. Wasting energy! He scolds himself, wondering if Lakota would scold him as well. For a precious second, just before he and the stallion go into close quarter combat, he lets his attention waver. He searches for Lakota among the landscape, hoping to see the familiar roan figure somewhere among the green. To his dismay, she is not found. A frown befalls his features, just as he makes contact with the brute. Immediately he's being attacked, body against body in an all out war. He's slammed from the left, body teetering to the right, pain shooting through his shoulder as several spikes drive into his skin. Only one or two made deep wounds, the rest were mere scratches. Locket lets out a huff, nostrils flaring as his body screams in pain. The stallion has taken damage himself, however, Locket's curved sword tipped in red. Blood for blood, my good sir. If he had a hat to tip, he would tip it here and now, snickering at his own comment.

Locket made a mistake, and he realizes just a little too late. He can already see the dark, tense muscles of the stallion's hind as he passes by, eyes widening. He failed to bite the quarters of his opponent, and this time there would be no bruise for bruise, this time it was a simple sock-in-the-face. Locket panics as dark hooves fly, trying to move his face from being hit. Instead he takes a dangerous blow to his neck, gasping as he's deprived of air for a moment. Staggering, the stallion tries to breath deeply, trying to regain himself while avoiding the dangerous daggers of the brutish warrior. Now he's become a play toy to this stallion, being tossed about like a rag doll. The stallion hits his shoulder to his rib cage, spiked collar once again piercing his skin. A silent cry of pain escapes his maw as he bends his neck, trying to reach over the rack of antlers to the stallions' neck or shoulder, ivory teeth bared and ready to make contact with skin. He catches the sight of blood from his shoulder, angered by the fact he was letting this stallion throw him around. Fed up, Locket lets out a bellowing cry, a cry of battle, and thrusts himself at the stallion in a flurry of forehooves, wishing to strike the stallion's left shoulder, the same place he had just tried to bite. You will pay! He sees the antlers, and finds that he should purposefully get his horn intertwined with his, and that will be when the fight will rise to its most exciting, its prime time. Even closer. He pushes forward once all four hooves are on the ground, thrusting his horn towards the antlers, hoping that the curvature of his sword will get stuck in the tines of this stallions' antlers.

"talk talk talk"
[WC: 708
Attack: 2/3
[@Gaucho]]

xjrlokix.flickr

Locket talk :: L = R
Ascended Helovian

Gaucho The Wildfire Posts: 1,004
Deceased atk: 8.5 | def: 11.5 | dam: 8
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17.2 :: 12 HP: 85 | Buff: PINNACLE
Mara :: Black Mamba Snake :: Paralyze & Vorsa :: Plain Zephyr :: Phoenix Odd
#5


Slamming his shoulder against another, was a move that had rarely failed Gaucho. He is not so slow, as some would think. His Hanoverian blood gives him speed that heavier builds of his height likely lack, and yet most of his war-ability comes in close range combat, where his ability to throw his weight around can be utilized. Should Locket simply flee from battle - or if perhaps he had wings - Gaucho would certainly be at more of a disadvantage. But it is only the saber on the pale boys brow that gives him an edge (literally), and little else, against the warrior.

Gaucho can feel as well as hear the impact of his hooves against Locket's neck, and the dun wonders if this should rightly be called a spar after all. His goal in coming here, was for the Foothills to demonstrate that they were worthy allies for the Throat, not punching bags. If Gaucho needed exercise and target practice, he would have stayed in the Throat, and trained in the sands.

But the boy had answered his call. Gaucho would not show mercy and end this early; he would give the warrior what he asked for, come what may.

As Gaucho caught, and once again felt the body of his fellow warrior yield to his bulk, and the spikes around his neck, he thought he felt the neck of the pale warrior twist. Was he trying to bite him? Bite where? His antlers? Gaucho felt nothing, and could only assume it was merely a desperate counter-attack on the part of his bladed-opponent.

As a cry emanated from Locket, Gaucho's dark ears pinned against his skull, but his dark lips twisted in a smirk. If nothing else, he admired the pale stallion's spirit. As Locket rose up, front hooves flailing, Gaucho tossed his muzzle upwards, to protect his face from being hit. He felt the small but powerful cloven hooves connect with his chest, pounding against the dark blue stripes that covered his muscles. It would bruise surely, adding to the already navy pigment of his chest, but would do little else. The skin had not been broken; the warrior's lithe body had not the force (this time), to prevail against the hardened physique of Gaucho. Grunting, Gaucho too rose onto his hind legs, hoping to strike out with his dark hooves against Locket's chest, or flailing forelegs. His goal was to thrust the smaller stallion backwards, rather than deliver serious blows.

As he lowered himself back to the ground, his stormy gaze narrowed as he watched the curved blade of Locket's horn rising not directly to his face, but higher to his antlers ?????!?! Gaucho thought, ears still pinned against his skull. He was taller than the stallion, and with Locket's hooves remaining on the ground, Gaucho couldn't understand what this move was meant to do.

Unless...

"SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS"

In his antlers, Mara hissed furiously as the sharpened point jutted towards her. She fled to his thick neck, as Gaucho lowered his brow to try and catch the horn of Locket. Given all the places that Locket's singular blade could be caught, Gaucho's intention was to force it to lock into place between his many points, so that he would have control over the stallions head. One he believed that this had been achieved, he wrenched his large skull hard to the right, hoping to force Locket's own neck to bend, should it be pivoting within Gaucho's antlers. If this was successful, they would be nearly brow-to-brow, tilting to the right. Silently, Mara lunged for the left side of Locket's neck - hoping that it was turned upwards given the angle potentially caused by Gaucho. Poison dripped from her outstretched fangs, as her gun-metal steel body rocketed forwards, hoping to bite the left side of Locket's neck. Her body snapped back, as Gaucho's thick neck tensed, as he tried to maintain whatever hold might have upon Locket.









[ WC: 658
Attack 2/3

@[Locket] .


OOC Notes
Loads juicier than last time! I really liked the bit about looking for Lakota. You had some really good one liners in there - about Locket being the nerd having his lunch money stolen. In cases like that, you could stretch the metaphor. Something like, "Locket would do this for all the nerds - for every small stallion that the pretty girls overlooked. He would defeat this bully. Never again would he let a big oaf like Gaucho shove him in a locker. Other places that you might have expanded on his emotion, was at the end. He was looking for Lakota, and thinks that she isn't there. Considering he's getting thrown around, what's he thinking? Maybe now he's glad that she isn't there to see - or maybe, some part of him is glad each time Gaucho hits him, because it means another trip to see her (you mentioned something like this in your first post).

Areas to work on:
  • Direction/Clarity: When Gaucho spins around to attack, he is using his right shoulder against Locket's left - meaning they are side by side, facing the same direction. In your post, you say that Locket tries to hit Gaucho's left side. I think you meant right - and if you didn't, that would mean that he's reaching over him. I don't think that this is the case, given that Gaucho is so much bigger (and has wings in the way as well). But it puts me in a weird spot to reply, because now I have to try and decide, do I reply based on what I thought you meant? Or what you wrote? Typically, I'm forced to respond to what you wrote.

    Now that I re-read it, I wonder if Locket stopped? You said Locket 'thrusts himself at Gaucho'... is that meant to say that now they are facing one another? If this is unclear to me, it will likely be unclear to the judge as well. Also write your attacks as clearly as possible - leave no ambiguity as to what you're doing, even if it means repeating yourself more than once.

I'm excited to see where you go with this next attack! Why is Locket trying to tangle horns with Gaucho? I feel like he's going to lose this battel, given that there are so many points where Gaucho's horns can force Locket's head to move. It would have been interesting in your post for you to spell out the rationale of this attack. You say it's going to be the height of the fight, and now I want to know how!

You've definitely improved already! I think you did a really good job of appropriately taking damage here as well.


Image Credits
Please tag me in every post! Magic/Force is allowed on Gaucho at any time.


Official Posts: 847
Administrator
Stallion :: Equine :: ::
Official
#6
Deadline extended.

Official Posts: 847
Administrator
Stallion :: Equine :: ::
Official
#7
Gaucho AA'ed. Default win to Gaucho. 0.5VP awarded. Locket can request partial judging which can change the outcome of the battle.


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