the Rift


[PRIVATE] Still learning to love, just starting to crawl

Miykael Posts: 136
Outcast
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17hh :: 11 :: Birdsong
Eliana :: Common Zephyr :: Roc Rottie
#1
(ooc: @[Alysanne] - take your time, love, I know you're busy. just need to do this thread first before I can have him go anywhere else or talk to anyone else. <3 )

Hell.

That's what this was. That's what he banished himself to. The infection that had consumed him, transformed him into a decaying beast, had been stripped from him by the young mare that had come to Aly's aid. If only she could have taken the memories away as well. What he had done to Aly was despicable. In truth, she didn't deserve the emotional abuse he had poured over her, not after everything she had been through. Not after he had spent several years trying to keep her safe. Not if he loved her as much as he said he did. On the one hand, he was glad Iona wasn't there to see the mess he had made - she would maim him for sure. Yet, he almost wished she was here to beat him down. To make him pay for what he had done. Aly wasn't safe with him, not anymore.

Perhaps he was being melodramatic. Perhaps he was making more of this than was necessary. Regardless, he wasn't the hero he had always tried to be.

When Tandavi healed him he fled, stumbling and frantic, into the deepest depths of the caves near Helovia's heart. When the disease had dissipated and everyone left the shelter of the caves behind, he remained behind - clinging to the cool darkness of the crystal cavern until it seemed all was clear. Emaciated and worn, feathers coated in dust, the stallion finally ventured upwards - if only a short distance. Winding through the maze of the crystal cavern was a piece of cake now. Miykael could probably navigate it with his eyes closed. But that could potentially bring him joy, joy that he hadn't allowed himself to feel since he had been changed and healed. Joy was unacceptable. He did not deserve it anymore.

With slow, methodical steps he moves through the various tunnels and caverns that had once been the blessed shelter from the disease. Miykael makes his way to the glowing room, finding it still flush with vegetation. With a heavy exhale he moves towards a particularly thick patch of moss and slowly lowers himself down into its' softness. He nibbles idly on the surrounding vegetation, taking in enough to live but not enough to pack on any weight. In truth, he was just as thin now as he was when he was infected. Thin and gangly, he almost looked as old as he really is: ancient. Miykael doesn't care. Doesn't even think twice about his own condition but he never has and likely never would.

Even in the lonely darkness he could still see her, hear her. Perhaps this made everything worse. Perhaps he should gather the courage to exit this monstrous place and fly away, leaving her behind and allowing her to move on in peace. No. That would be easy, too easy and the potential for his future happiness is too great in that particular scenario. This, the torture he endures every day - that is what he deserves. He needs to live with what he has done, not run from it. So he stays, steadfast and stubborn, sickly thin and exhausted - not moving on but not fleeing like a coward. He resolves to remain here until he is certain that Aly has moved on with her life. Then, and only then, would he emerge.

You're the one that I love and I'm saying goodbye...

say something, i'm giving up on you
i'll be the one, if you want me to

Image Credits
[Image: mikey_by_moonstone_designs-d9dgnba.png]
icon base: Bronzehalo :: from Nickel <3

permission for all except death and dismemberment.
** please tag miykael in replies **
replies slow? check here for status updates.

Alysanne the Devoted Posts: 641
World's Edge Queen atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3.5
Mare :: Pegasus :: 16 hh :: 11 years HP: 62 | Buff: NOVICE
Hemlock :: Flammulated Owl :: Heal & Cypress :: Great Horned Owl :: None Sarah
#2
Alysanne &

Miykael
Of course she had come back to look for him. She had slowly been making her way here for a while, the idea coming to her the last time she was in the caves. His absence in her life did not go unnoticed - though it took her a little while to realize she wasn’t so much angry as she was sad. Eventually she would find him again, she had faith, but it was finding it in herself to actually go looking that was the problem. In the end, how could she not go looking for him. He was her best friend, it didn’t matter how much he had hurt her. She needed to know whether he was alright. Or, at least, more right than he had been the last time they spoke.

She wished she had asked someone to come with her as soon as she reached the heart and saw that entrance. Hemlock hooted softly to her, a note of encouragement and sadness - not quite understanding his bonded’s mood or the situation that had led them here. He understood enough to not stray too far, to know that he was needed with her - and so he stayed perched upon her head, brushing her ears softly with his wings to soothe her every time she stopped and paced and debated whether today was the day or not.

In the end, it was. She had no idea where she found the strength, but she did find it somewhere to go back into those caves. Funny how it did not seem like a big deal when she had been here with Resplendence, Kahlua and Dragomir. They seemed so much… darker without the glow of Kahlua’s smile and the soft voice of her fellow doctor. This time they felt the same as they had when everyone was living here, except instead of bodies crowding around her there were ghosts and memories clinging to her.

Her pace quickened, fear of those memories pushing her forward - not realizing that the very memory that was haunting her, the memory that had been stolen, had taken place in a cave very much like this. Moving as quickly as she dared through the caverns she found her way to the room with the plants. Maybe there if there were ghosts, they would be of Lena and Imogen. They would be of happier times and of life and the earth.

Wouldn’t you know it, a ghost was there waiting for her but not the one she was expecting. Emerald eyes widened in surprise (despite the fact that he was the reason she was here) and she put the breaks on - skidding on the soft ground and tearing up mosses as she brought herself up short. Her breath escaped her all at once, bringing forth his name without any thought. “Mikey---” No, not anymore. She hadn’t referred to him as Mikey in some time. So she tried again, still feeling short of breath - though whether it was from her short run or from her discovery she couldn’t say. “Miykael.” It took so much for her to stand still, to not rush forward and look him over, to prod and poke every inch and see where the damage was. If she got him back to the Edge she could heal him... But somewhere in her soft heart she found rock that kept her anchored in her spot. Rock where the words he spat at her were written in blood, unwashed by tears because she just couldn’t bring herself to cry.

What was there to say to him? No, there was too much. There was no need to ask him if he remembered what happened. Alysanne had agonized over his actions, looking for signs, and she knew the Mikey she loved would have come and found her after he was cured. If he had no memory of that day at the mouth of these caves, he would have come home. Staying down here, staying away from her, could only mean that he remembered.

For a brief moment, seeing him in this state, she could understand the desire to take away the painful memories. If only that wasn't a sickening violation of the mind. Where was that anger she had felt, however briefly? Where was it to fuel a fire and launch them past this moment? There was only sadness in those emerald eyes now, her heart breaking all over again back in his presence.

All of the questions she had would not come to her now. All she could manage to croak out was “You’re alive.” in perhaps the best imitation of ‘standoff-ish’ that she would ever accomplish.
Obsidian Dawn, Evelivesey, ISOStock
table by Sevin
please tag Alysanne in replies
[Image: alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png]
made by the lovely tamme
non-life threatening physical force is allowed at all times, but preference is to be checked with beforehand for any injuries

Miykael Posts: 136
Outcast
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17hh :: 11 :: Birdsong
Eliana :: Common Zephyr :: Roc Rottie
#3
There was a certain level of peace in these caves, though it is accompanied by a loneliness that pierces the heart and leaves the soul weeping in despair. Miykael welcomed it. Longed for it, even, but not as much as he longed for Alysanne. Never so much as that. She is an angel - more of one than he ever was or ever will be (and he had been one). Though his stomach clearly desires more nourishment, his appetite suddenly dissipates. Lifting his blue eyes, cool and distant, to gaze across the room he is soon lost, replaying every moment he spent with her - starting from the moment he found her.

Beaten and bloodied, afraid and in pain, and yet... alone. He couldn't leave her like that, curled up by the edge of the lake. He didn't want to frighten her worse than she already had been, so he made the decision to help her in the form of an otter. Soft, cuddly, sweet and friendly face - but most of all, harmless. She accepted him in mere moments, allowed him to heal her and it wasn't until he revealed who and what he really was that she showed any real hesitation. He nearly lost her then. Nearly lost her when he told her that he was a demon. A demon like the beast that had attacked her. Miykael pleaded with her, begged her to trust him, explained that he was different from the other demons. He even believed it himself...

Until now.

That had been the start of their friendship, the beginning of something he hoped would never end. That's why he had followed her, that's why he kept her safe from the shadows. He had been her angel, guarding her without her even knowing what he had done. Miykael had never wanted the recognition, not for keeping her safe, but what he failed to realize was that without the recognition he couldn't possibly expect her to form a bond deeper than friendship with him. He was around, they had some good times together but he was a good friend that she saw only once in awhile. Miykael had bonded more to her than she had to him.

She had made that obvious outside the cave not long ago. The infection had made him more emotional than a mare in heat. Had he really whined about her not choosing him over Sasha? Miykael snorted sharply at the thought, closing his eyes and shaking his head in an attempt to clear his mind. When he opened them again, he saw her again but this time she was gliding towards him across the pond in the secret grove, joy sparkling in her emerald eyes. The memory simultaneously swelled his heart with love and pricked it like a needle to a balloon. His heart deflating and a lump forming in his throat. Tears welling in his eyes, he blinks rapidly and squeezes them shut in attempt to banish them, hoping the image would follow suit.

The sound of hurried hooves and frantic breath drifted down to him from the entrance. His ears swivel towards the sound, noticing the increasing volume and the sudden halt. A visitor, he thinks, and so he remains where he is - silent but obviously alive. It was under likely that they were here for him anyway. "Mikey..." the voice says. It's Aly. Dear, sweet Aly. Had she come for him - to forgive him or to beat him down? His head turns then, to look to her. He longs to jump to his feet and rush towards her, embrace her and apologize and tell her it wouldn't ever happen again but then she speaks again "Miykael." It hit him like a ton of bricks. Stabbed him in the heart and he longed for death so that the pain might cease.

She hadn't ever called him that before. At least not in a long, long time.

The shock had yet to wear off before she spoke again. "You're alive." The words were so matter-of-fact and aloof. He had lost her for good. That was the only explanation for her behavior. Then why was she here? He couldn't bring himself to hope. Couldn't bring himself to do little more than stand. And even that was a difficult task. Weakened and malnourished, the thin stallion lifts himself up onto somewhat shaky legs and, after a few moments, he turns to her. "Yes." he replies, his voice hoarse from disuse. There were so many things he longed to say, so many explanations for what had happened but he can't bring himself to say any of it. Instead, all he can utter are three words and even those three words sound inadequate and useless to his own ears but they are all that he has. "I'm sorry, Aly."

say something, i'm giving up on you
i'll be the one, if you want me to

Image Credits
[Image: mikey_by_moonstone_designs-d9dgnba.png]
icon base: Bronzehalo :: from Nickel <3

permission for all except death and dismemberment.
** please tag miykael in replies **
replies slow? check here for status updates.

Alysanne the Devoted Posts: 641
World's Edge Queen atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3.5
Mare :: Pegasus :: 16 hh :: 11 years HP: 62 | Buff: NOVICE
Hemlock :: Flammulated Owl :: Heal & Cypress :: Great Horned Owl :: None Sarah
#4
Alysanne &

Miykael
A quick, reflex step is taken as he stood and shook from the effort - his legs looking as though they were going to give out any moment. She wanted to help him stay on his feet and be there for him, but the thought of touching him caused her ever-nice ways to falter. Undoubtedly she would chastise herself for that later - she knew the moment he said her name that she wouldn’t be leaving this cave without him. If she had to send Hemlock for help to drag him out of here then so be it, but he would return to the sunlight and he would get better. Perhaps then it would be easier to focus on her distrust, when those bones were no longer visible and that voice was no longer hoarse. She hoped Resplendence would help her - there was no reason to think that the dun doctor wouldn’t. She just needed to get him there and she wasn’t sure if she was going to be able to do it herself. He needed healing, he needed help.

But they had only just begun. The trip to the surface was inevitable, she felt, but it would not be happening for a little while yet. She needed to find her voice again. The little owl perched between her ears stirred but he did not interrupt. Not yet. Dark eyes just watched the wraith-like creature before them, wondering why Alysanne was trembling as she fought to stay still in one spot, to not just give in. She needed to be strong for once in her life.

That apology felt like a slap - they seemed to be exchanging verbal blows - as though those two words could magically heal everything. She wished they could, but they did nothing for her. She had hoped that maybe they had all been lies when they were being spat at her while he was sick - maybe he was just trying to hurt her. But she felt the weight of the truth and she believed them. “Sorry for what? For what you said? For stealing away my memories? Or for lying to me about it all this time?” Anger tried to rise but it couldn’t break through the sadness that was there, the heartache that was present for so many reasons. For her friend who was in such terrible, terrible shape - for the memories that he had stolen from her. And now, now the questions that had been harassing her when she was alone at night come to her. She had been careful, so careful, to not be alone lately - to focus on anyone else and not what was happening with her. Alysanne did not want to deal with anything that had been spoken that day - not Mikey’s feelings, not the knowledge that Sasha would continue to abandon her again and again, not the missing memories.

Were they why she couldn’t sleep unless someone else was there? Protecting her from the darkness? Why she had taken to wandering, racing, at night instead of sleeping. It wasn’t their time in these caves, it was what she learned while she was here. The flashes that had been resurfacing here and there - of cries and pain, of her sweet sister, of blood.

Tears she wished would sink back into her welled within her eyes and she turned her head to hide them from him, the glow of the plants glinting on those little droplets of salt water. Still with her head turned, she whispered softly in the darkness - her voice shaking as she suppressed the sobs. “What were they? Tell me what it was that you took from me. I need to know. I need to.” She had been agonizing over it ever since she had found out, wondering what it could be. Was it something terrible? Or had he taken something else, and how much of her past was she missing? All this time he had been her best friend and she never knew. Why hadn’t he just told her? Did she really come across so weak as to not be unable to handle the knowledge?
Obsidian Dawn, Evelivesey, ISOStock
table by Sevin
please tag Alysanne in replies
[Image: alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png]
made by the lovely tamme
non-life threatening physical force is allowed at all times, but preference is to be checked with beforehand for any injuries

Miykael Posts: 136
Outcast
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17hh :: 11 :: Birdsong
Eliana :: Common Zephyr :: Roc Rottie
#5
She takes a single step towards him when he struggles to rise but it manages to elude his attention. Perhaps because he is so entirely focused on not falling back down or perhaps because he had written any such movement off as a figment of his imagination. His optimism and longing gaining the better of him; his heart feeding him illusions, images of what he secretly wished would happen. Miykael had never seen Alysanne this way, so surrounded and guarded by walls. Walls that, although he had never witnessed them within her before, seemed coated with poison for him and him alone. A poison that he so highly deserved. A blockade to keep her safe from him. Had it not been for the fact that she had sought for him, he would have breathed a heavy sigh of relief at the notion.

But here she was. Here before him and it really didn't seem as though she had stumbled upon him by chance. This was no accident. That much was clear, but then why she had come searching for him? Perhaps she wanted answers, perhaps she wanted him to undo what he had done. A sigh trickles past his lips and as much as he desperately wanted to lower his gaze, retreat back into the crystal caves and hurl his broken body into the treacherous crystal spikes - he couldn't bring himself to move. He couldn't will his legs to do anything except shake in weakness from the lack nourishment. He couldn't hide himself any longer, couldn't keep to himself and expect her to leave him be.

Her words are sharp but heavily laced with a sadness that could've shattered his heart if it were still whole. It hadn't been whole for several seasons now but he couldn't bring himself to be upset by that fact. 'Sorry for what?' her words weigh heavy on his mind, crushing his soul beneath every boulder she piles upon his back. As much as he longed to apologize for everything, he couldn't bring himself to do it. Miykael gazes into her eyes, his blue gaze moistening with tears. Tears that he couldn't bring himself to notice anymore. "Sorry for what I said, for lying to you and for causing you pain," and a pause, "but I cannot apologize for taking those memories." Those last words were strong, resolute, and oh so hard for him to say.

Miykael had hurt her more than he could have ever imagined. In the moments that pass, the silence between them deafening, she turns her head away from him. That subtle gesture pained him more than anything else ever had. It was as if a mountain had been dropped upon him - turning him into a pile of blood, flesh and bone dust. Her gentle, soft and quaking voice interrupts the silence. The moment had come. The moment he had been expecting and dreading all at the same time. "I owe you that at least." he whispers, holding himself back from rushing to her and holding her tight. It was unlikely to provide her with any comfort now anyway, despite how unbelievably difficult it was for him to resist. With a soft sigh, he begins. "Back in Nocturne, you and Iona ventured into a cave and... and you were attacked." a pause, silently pleading with her that it would be enough. The dunskin tobiano knew deep down into the depths of his soul that she wouldn't be satisfied with just that.

"It was a demon, Aly. He beat you two down, physically and... mentally. Planted images in your minds. You were heavily wounded when I found you by the lake. I healed the last of your physical wounds but Iona sought me out later. She said you were so plagued by nightmares you hardly slept anymore. She couldn't stand to see you like that. She came to me to see if I could help you since I had helped you before and she knew... she knew what I was and what I was capable of. She nearly begged me, Aly." his voice begins to quiver and he pauses, swallowing hard to force the lump from his throat and squeeze back the tears again. "I only took away what he had done to you. Everything I did... everything that I took away...everything was done out of love. From Iona and... myself." Here he allowed the silence to sink in. He avoided the details of the attack, predominantly because he didn't know them all that well but also because he felt they were unnecessary. All he did was place the memories in a metaphorical box and lock it up tight. His blue eyes watched her a moment longer before they dropped to the mosses growing beneath his hooves. "I never intended to hurt you, Aly. Never."

There was nothing left to say. Nothing at all.

say something, i'm giving up on you
i'll be the one, if you want me to

Image Credits
[Image: mikey_by_moonstone_designs-d9dgnba.png]
icon base: Bronzehalo :: from Nickel <3

permission for all except death and dismemberment.
** please tag miykael in replies **
replies slow? check here for status updates.

Alysanne the Devoted Posts: 641
World's Edge Queen atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3.5
Mare :: Pegasus :: 16 hh :: 11 years HP: 62 | Buff: NOVICE
Hemlock :: Flammulated Owl :: Heal & Cypress :: Great Horned Owl :: None Sarah
#6
Alysanne &

Miykael
He didn’t divulge the details, but as he spoke, the wall in her mind slipped and Alysanne remembered. A loud gasp escaped her as the weight of these recovered memories slammed into her, knocking the breath out of her as her eyes widened - unfocused on Miykael, unfocused on anything in the present. She remembered wanting to explore, encouraging Iona to come with her as she danced around - gleefully happy about everything that was going on in her life. She had a new home then and her first mate, everything was spring and sunshine. And then he found them - they didn’t know the cave was where demons were found, they didn’t know there was a dark heart to Nocturne.

“Abaddon.” She whispered her name as she felt her legs give out - felt everything slip from her. Colliding with the mossy ground, her knees screamed at the impact - even the lush carpet could not completely hide the rock that was underneath. Hemlock screeched, flapping his wings and pulling at her mane in a feeble attempt to keep her standing but ultimately he came down with her. “Oh, Mikey.” The pain was hazy, as former-pain always is, but she remembered everything. Remembered the first time his teeth sunk into her neck - and her attempts at beating him away with her wings only to have him latch onto one and use his jaw to shatter the bones, scattering her blood everywhere.

His tongue along her body as he whispered into her mind that she was his forever more. The images that he planted there, they seemed so real while it was happening. It all comes back as a rush - being trapped as he tortured, raped, attacked, killed her sister over and over again. In five minutes she witnessed the crimes a thousand times. And the terror of realizing that Iona was witnessing the same thing in reverse.

And the pregnancy. Finding out she was going to be a mother from him. Those tears that had started to gently fall turned into sobs as this moment in her life rips its way back into her mind, eradicating the lie. And it was this pain, the present pain of this recovered memory, that caused her to want her Mikey beside her, comforting her and reminding her that the world wasn’t a terrifying place.

Iona’s beautiful body, broken and coated in a mixture of both of their blood. The wings that she loved to use so much splintered and dragging behind her as they made their escape.

And as soon as those memories were back she wished that they were gone again. How could he love anyone as pathetic as she was, requiring someone to take away her memories in order to make her whole again. Her sister had to go find him, asking him to help, because Alysanne was useless. The flood won’t stop but she needed to fight against it and surface back into the present just for a moment. Still she can’t focus on anything, those green eyes lost somewhere in the past. She had wondered when the moment had passed that she had been unable to sleep while alone but now she knew.

She had gotten used to the presence of another because they hadn’t wanted to leave her alone - someone needed to be there when she woke up screaming night after night. “What is there to love about me?” No bitterness, only acceptance - the words coming out as barely a whisper - something that might have been lost if it weren’t for the still air around them. She was weak, a danger. She couldn’t even explore some caves without endangering her sister and her unborn child.

For a moment she is able to focus again - green eyes finding blue as the sobs become more violent. Of course he was only trying to protect her, that was what he did - her anger seemed so silly now that she knew. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know - I didn’t know!” But she won’t ask him to take them away again, she doesn’t even know if he could. At least they are there and maybe, just maybe, she will be able to handle them this time around.
Obsidian Dawn, Evelivesey, ISOStock
table by Sevin
please tag Alysanne in replies
[Image: alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png]
made by the lovely tamme
non-life threatening physical force is allowed at all times, but preference is to be checked with beforehand for any injuries

Miykael Posts: 136
Outcast
Stallion :: Pegasus :: 17hh :: 11 :: Birdsong
Eliana :: Common Zephyr :: Roc Rottie
#7
Her loud gasp caused him to hesitate and as he gazed upon her, he saw her eyes widen and as his name slipped past her lips in a soft whisper, she collapsed. Oh shit. His heart suddenly begins to race, pounding in his chest so hard that he wondered how his chest could even contain it. "No. No no no no. Aly, no, please.." his voice is frantic and pained. He hadn't really noticed the owl much before but now that he had seen it clearly - screeching, flapping, grabbing her mane in a desperate yet feeble attempt to keep her standing. He knew what kind of owl it was and his heart screamed. That was the kind of owl that he had chosen as one of his forms in Nocturne. One of his shifts, you might say. See! he wanted to scream, we are meant to be.

His defiance, however, is short lived. Truly, how could he focus on something so trivial as their relationship when Aly was clearly struggling. Miykael rushed to her, as quickly as he was capable with the slick moss covering the rock floor of the cave. A thought that the owl might not take kindly to his approach or understand his intent crossed his mind, however fleeting it was. He wanted to help her, longed to, but he didn't know how. Blocking the memory had only been a temporary fix and one that she hadn't been in agreement with. Even if she did agree to allow him to block them all over again, he could see an endless loop and watch it on repeat - her finding out he blocked something in her mind, anger, confession, and then pain. When would it all end?

With white wings tucked against his sides, he lowers his head and reaches to touch her nose with his. "I'm sorry, Aly...so sorry." he murmurs, the words floating softly on his breath. Blue eyes gaze into vibrant emerald green and he realizes that she isn't here. Alysanne was lost, but where? Lost in thought? Lost in the past and the memories that have clearly just resurfaced? "Please come back to me, Aly...please." he cannot help but to beg her, though it seems so hopeless now.

'What is there to love about me?' There is no bitterness in her voice but only a cool acceptance. Miykael can't prevent the snort of derision from exploding into the silence surrounding them. Not that he tried all that hard, to be fair. He hesitates to speak. Not because there is any validity to her words but because he can't grasp the words to describe it or to convince her. And he had to convince her. Wasn't that his purpose? To keep her safe and happy, wasn't that what he was supposed to do? Even at the expense of his own happiness, as is usually the case.

"Everything." he begins but he knows that isn't where it will end. "You're beautiful, Aly." and he pauses, replaying the words in his mind and quickly realizing that they would likely be perceived in the shallow sense. "Not just... on the outside. But on the inside. You have a beautiful soul." There, that's better. Yet, it's still not enough. "You love easily, see the good in everything and everyone even when the good is so hard to see. Aly, I was an angel by title once, long ago, but you are more of an angel than I ever was." And there it was, but would she believe it? Would it be enough? Would anything he did ever be enough for her? She had so easily placed him in the friend zone all those years ago and he has been desperately trying to claw his way out ever since.

The battle, it seemed, was a losing one. Perhaps he is simply a glutton for punishment because when her eyes once again focus on his, her sobs growing more violent - he can't help but long to hold her tight and wipe away those tears. Lowering himself down to lay before her, as close as he can comfortably get, he reaches out with his muzzle in an attempt to stroke her cheek. Her apologies fall on deaf ears. He simply chooses not to acknowledge them, they were unnecessary after all. Wasn't he the one that had been in the wrong? He who had blocked those memories in her mind without her knowledge or permission? "Of course you didn't know." The words are soft and kind, whispered gently in her ear. "Shh, Aly. Hush now. It's alright." Would she accept him again? Even if he is just a friend? His chest swells with anticipation and hope. Though his eyes don't dare to divulge such secrets.

i just want to believe in you and me

Image Credits
[Image: mikey_by_moonstone_designs-d9dgnba.png]
icon base: Bronzehalo :: from Nickel <3

permission for all except death and dismemberment.
** please tag miykael in replies **
replies slow? check here for status updates.

Alysanne the Devoted Posts: 641
World's Edge Queen atk: 7 | def: 10 | dam: 3.5
Mare :: Pegasus :: 16 hh :: 11 years HP: 62 | Buff: NOVICE
Hemlock :: Flammulated Owl :: Heal & Cypress :: Great Horned Owl :: None Sarah
#8
Alysanne &

Miykael
Alysanne felt as though she has unravelled completely - nothing else she has ever experienced could possibly be a duplicate of the emotions that were raking through her body with their own free will. There was sadness, fear, anger, guilt raging in their own seas that swelled together and consumed her - drowning her. The guilt was worst of all.

Guilt for not protecting Iona, guilt for turning this into something about her when her worry still lay with Mikey. How selfish could she be?

Hemlock is at a lost, unable to protect his bonded from this tragedy that existed long before he had. He accepts the presence of the stallion for now - black eyes trained on Alysanne as he clamours into her mane and clings there, hooting softly to her now and then - plucking and stroking the strands of her mane.

They are both comforting her when it was she who should be comforting Mikey, weak as he was. Not the other way around. How could he be near her after how she treated him? The kind words he spoke about her, calling her beautiful - calling her an angel - will soothe her later when she remembered them. For now she was just trying to come back to the present, focusing on him and his words without actually hearing them. Focusing on his presence as he lay down near her, brushing his muzzle softly against her cheek to remove the tears that were staining her dark skin.

It takes a while for the sobs to subside, slowly they recede and then she is calm again - allowing her breaths to align with his. For a long time after the sobs are gone, there doesn’t seem to be anything to say - she’s forgiven him, completely and utterly, but she’s sure he’ll know that. Just as she knows he is sorry, that he did what he did with the best intentions. Now that she knew - well, it certainly did not make it okay but it made it easier to understand. Wouldn’t she want to take away the pain of another if she could?

She rested her head against his - enjoying being this close to him once again. Enjoying having her best friend back in her life.

Alysanne did not know how long they were tangled together in silence but she broke it finally, her voice soft and hoarse from crying.“Come back to the sun with me, Mikey. Come back to the Edge. There is too much angel left in you for you to belong down here any longer.”
Obsidian Dawn, Evelivesey, ISOStock
table by Sevin
please tag Alysanne in replies
[Image: alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png]
made by the lovely tamme
non-life threatening physical force is allowed at all times, but preference is to be checked with beforehand for any injuries


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