the Rift


[PRIVATE] when the world gets loud, I get louder

Lakota the Poisoner Posts: 278
Deceased atk: 5.5 | def: 9.0 | dam: 4.5
Mare :: Equine :: 15.1hh :: 7 Years HP: 64 | Buff: NOVICE
Aodaun :: Polar Bear :: Terrorize Brit
#1



She was so lost.

In a whirlwind, Apollo had thrust himself back onto the horizon of her life. Disrupting the slow settlement she'd worked so hard to create. Lakota's emotions had been electrified and scattered to a violent wind, lost to her desperately grabbing hands. While she was reluctant to portray herself as a jealous or paranoid lover, her heart sank with every loving look the stallion would freely lay upon her mate. What concerned her even more perhaps were the fond answers, silent though they were, that Ktulu would respond with. Her heart and mind were in turmoil, clinging desperately to the memory of the Constrictor's agreement to have another foal, one carried by Lakota. To be candid, the Poisoner had conflicting feelings regarding the soft-spoken overo, but her monogamous loyalty refused to allow her even the consideration of those emotions.

Even worse, she had begun to lose herself. Her irritation with herd life, with the whining peaceful do-gooder denizens had surmounted all feelings of security and homeliness. Taskless and underrated, her prowess cast aside in favor of greenlings, Lakota was swiftly becoming murderous and cramped in the herdlands. She longed for the Foothills, her heart craved the Grey. She wanted her family back. And not just the family she'd magnetized towards herself, tucking to flank and heart alike, but the blood relatives who had disappeared once more from her life. The shame was overwhelming, to know that she'd let it happen so passively when she'd fought so hard to find them in previous seasons.

With every eve she found herself helplessly longing for her fratello. But last she had seen of him, he'd been crumpled and woozy, from her own magic at that. He had shoved her flightless from the nest she'd needed so badly at that moment.

He had abandoned her, for a weak mare that was better off dead for all her suicidal tendencies and aggravating self-deprecating habits.

Why was she so much better than Lakota? Why couldn't she win? Why had he left her, his sorellina?

Misunderstandings were littered throughout the entire confrontation, but her heart only knew pain. Shied away from it, for as much as Ktulu and love and her own desires for motherhood may have softened her, instinct and habit demanded she not allow the memory to harm her more than it had.

Preservation, perhaps.

Still, she was helpless and lost without her fratello. Lakota toyed with the idea of speaking with Ktulu, informing her of her intent to leave and seek out her elder brother. In the end she dismissed the notion. It would only further her emotional disarray, and Lakota tended to get violent and defensive when she felt her own weakness making an appearance. If she wanted to speak with Alleo she had to do so carefully. After all she'd practically drugged him and fled, she wouldn't blame him if he were to chase her away without considering her words. Even if it meant shattering her heart to realize once and for all that she was alone, her brother lost to her.

So she lost herself to the mists, slipping free unnoticed into the wilds. As if anyone would miss her, she snorted bitterly to herself. A once-queen, degraded into a mere servant. Overlooked. Oh, but not Ktulu. Ktulu was still heralded as a hero, her title far more freely used, and her rank speaking for itself. Lakota's bitterness was shocking, and she feared further for the secrets that lay within her psyche. That had always been Alleo's job, to know her heart's troubles and help her navigate them, socially and emotionally damaged as she was.

The air is cold, nearly biting as she ventures east. It is he only place she knows to look. Surely her fratello stayed in the Falls for his little broken china doll. Lakota could not resist another snort, a cloud of vapor tickling her muzzle in response. Lakota was damaged as well, but she had picked herself up, forcefully glued each shattered, bloodied piece back into place. What gave Rasta the right to parade around whimpering her agony, stealing away her brother's love when Lakota bravely shouldered (if at times concealed) her own cracks?

Hours slip by as she travels. The sun is bloody on the horizon, dying slowly even as it sheds its last colorful rays over the earth. Dusk slips like a blanket if reassurance over her shoulders as she approaches the herdlands. She does not cross, backpedaling when she first recognizes the scent markers. She had no desire to run into Midas, though he likely did not know her at all. Lifting her dark muzzle to the corresponding colors of the sky, she sings for him, weaving the telltale notes of her vocals to draw him out through recognition, familiarity. And then she waits, shamed and uncertain, tiny and haggard beneath the rising moon.

@[Alleo] this takes place just outside the borders ^___^



WE ONLY EXIST IN TERMS OF THIS CONFLICT
In the zone where black and white clash

Resurgere | Wroth
Please only tag starting posts, spars, and threads collecting dust!
Plot with me here!

Alleo Posts: 115
Hidden Account atk: 5.5 | def: 8.5 | dam: 4.5
Stallion :: Equine :: 17.3 :: 12 HP: 60 | Buff: NOVICE
ali
#2
How many seasons had passed since he'd last seen either of his sisters? Since he'd seen Rasta? Alleo had lost count, much to his chagrin. He had only been united briefly with Rasta on the floating island before she had disappeared again, and it had been even longer since he'd seen Lakota. He regretted their last meeting, wished that he had been more gentle in his attempt to force her from the protective nest he'd built for her. The last thing he had intended to do was hurt her feelings and make her feel unwanted. He'd tried to express as much but his sister's anger was explosive when the short fuse was lit. She had given him little chance to further explain himself before she'd drugged him with her poison mist and disappeared from his life completely.

He lived with a sadness in his heart that he could cause her such pain and that she could lash out so violently at him. It hurt him more that she thought that he would abandon her completely. Did she think that the years he'd spent protecting her meant nothing to him? He was angry, as well. Angry with her for the way she treated him. Angry with how she always crawled to him when she needed to be picked up and brushed off only to ignore the advice she sought from him. He was angry with her selfishness. Was he supposed to spend his entire life as a monk while she went off trying to find someone to fall in love with? Was he supposed to drop everything every time she came running for him with bruised knees? Was he not allowed to find someone else that he could love besides her?

If that was her wish then it had been granted for her. Rasta was gone and he was left alone in a herd where he didn't know a soul aside from who the leaders were and who the military heads were. He had no desire to get to know anyone or forge any bonds because he didn't want to be there. He had clung to the hope that Rasta would return but with each passing day his hope was diminishing and his desire to leave was growing. It was only those scraps of his hope that Rasta would return that kept him tied to the Falls, tirelessly patrolling the border.

It was only luck and his own stubbornness that had him near the border when Lakota approached. He smelled her long before he heard her voice calling for him like a siren in the darkness. A coldness settled in the pit of his stomach and his ears tilted back against his head as his sister's voice died away. What could she possibly want from him now? Hadn't she taken everything he'd had and left him for dead? He could not ignore her, though. He could not no matter how much he wanted to. It was his duty as a warrior of the Falls to intercept anyone who came too close to the border. And it was his duty as a brother to make sure that his sister was okay even if he just wanted her to leave him alone.

Snow crunched softly under his hooves as he walked toward the border, coming to a halt on one side as he gazed out at the other. Somewhere out there his sister stood, watching and waiting. One ear flicked back before taking an upright position once more. The darkness lifted as the moonlight broke its way through the clouds and he could see the small form of his sister highlighted by the silver light of the moon. His lips parted with his intent to speak, but his greeting died in his throat. His mouth closed and he frowned and, instead, waited for his sister to speak and tell him what it was that she wanted from him.

"."


Lakota the Poisoner Posts: 278
Deceased atk: 5.5 | def: 9.0 | dam: 4.5
Mare :: Equine :: 15.1hh :: 7 Years HP: 64 | Buff: NOVICE
Aodaun :: Polar Bear :: Terrorize Brit
#3



There is no mist to shroud his appearance, and her insides quake with the realization that she has no idea what she's going to say. Has to watch him advance, step by step, mind blank and tongue thick in her mouth. She feels small and ashamed beneath his burning gaze, his pointed silence. Like when she was a mere filly and had gotten into a fight with a yearling for saying Alleo was a bad brother. She could still remember the stern expression on his face as he told her that sometimes, you had to let it go. As if it were occurring in that moment, Lakota could recall the indignation she'd felt, how mad she'd been that Alleo hadn't stood up for himself, that she'd gotten in trouble for defending him. Why didn't he understand that she fought because she loved so deeply? She was incapable of expressing it any other way, her heart beat too fiercely, and her soul burned too bright to let anyone sully the name of her loved one. But he had been gentle, if firm, and he had taken her aside and explained that the two of them had a little secret. Lakota and Alleo knew that he wasn't a bad brother. And that had to be enough. It had to be.

In time she would come to understand, and would figure out that he had a double motive, protecting her from the wrath of their parents. A princess did not raise her hand to servants, after all. The dirty work was left to the underlings. She was above such brutality when off the battlefield.

They both had their demons, their reservations, but Lakota hoped that together they could figure it out. They had to. She couldn't live a life without her brother. And maybe she was as selfish as he claimed her to be in his thoughts, maybe he had spoiled her too much in her upbringing. But she was helpless and lost, even as a fully grown adult, without him there to take her hand and guide her along. And maybe that was why she had been so unbearably jealous. Maybe it hadn't been jealousy at all, but fear. Fear because seeing him take Rasta's hand, she'd been so afraid that if he dropped hers, she'd be lost forever.

She looked up at him through a thick curtain of ebony lashes, vibrant violet eyes the only exuberant thing about her in that moment. She felt...minimal. Shrunken and defeated beneath his gaze.

A little filly once more, knobby kneed and still as clueless about the world and how she could possibly belong in it.

"Fratello," she greeted quietly when his silence was too much for her to stand, pressing down painfully upon her shoulders until she felt as if she might stumble and crumple beneath it. And suddenly the words were there, tears thick on her lashes but refusing to let them fall. "Do you remember...do you remember when I got into a fight with that yearling, for calling you a bad brother?" She choked softly, swallowed hard. Wondered if she was really doing the right thing.

"I never thought I'd end up...end up being her." Her knees were suspiciously weak, and she locked them awkwardly like she was bowlegged. Emotions were not her forte. But she would go through hell and back if it meant her brother's forgiveness. Admitting she was wrong was probably the hardest part, for some part of her still adamantly, fervently pressed that she was correct in a lot of what she had done and said. Okay, maybe not done...but the point was the same.

"Mi dispiace tanto, tanto," she choked, shame thick in her throat. No longer able to look into his eyes as she admitted to her wrongs, she glanced down and stared sternly at her hooves as if daring them to give out. "I didn't want you to replace me. I hate her," she spits, even as her vocals tremble with the intensity of her emotions. "Because...because you're my brother. And I was so afraid..." her dainty crown shakes, a curtain of dark locks falling across her features, a shield that she doesn't doubt Alleo can see right through.

Lakota realizes that she's talking way too much, but her tongue is hardly able to stop and she can't seem to restrain herself. "I'm supposed to be an adult. I'm supposed to be okay with you falling in love, with...with you leaving me. But I'm not." A hoarse laugh, bitter and defeated, escapes her. "I'm not, and I'm pathetic for it. I shouldn't lean on you so heavily when you have your own burdens and desires...I was so, so wrong. And I'm sorry." Resolutely she keeps her eyes upon the sleek black of her hooves, how they disappear into the thick caress of the snow. Remembers with a sad curl of bitter nostalgia how much Alleo hated winter.

"I don't expect you to forgive me. And I don't expect you to listen to me cry over my own troubles. I just...I just missed you, fratello." And her voice finds the old notes of the song he used to sing her, that they used to sing to each other. Tremulously she begins to sing, just a single line, sad and wavering. "Non ti scordar di me..."

---

Translations:
Mi dispiace tanto tanto -- I'm so so sorry
Fratello -- brother
Non ti scordar di me -- don't forget me



WE ONLY EXIST IN TERMS OF THIS CONFLICT
In the zone where black and white clash

Resurgere | Wroth
Please only tag starting posts, spars, and threads collecting dust!
Plot with me here!

Alleo Posts: 115
Hidden Account atk: 5.5 | def: 8.5 | dam: 4.5
Stallion :: Equine :: 17.3 :: 12 HP: 60 | Buff: NOVICE
ali
#4
He waited for Lakota to speak and began to suspect that she would turn and run away again. Running seemed to be her answer every time she had to face her emotions. She was only strong when she could physically fight. She was damaged and it was his fault because he had not been able to fully protect her from the monstrosities that had been their parents. She had suffered and endured as he had and she was only a hollow shell of what she could have been. He should have taken her the day she was weaned and ran away with her, raised her on his own in the wilds where she would not have been subjected to the hatred of their parents. Alleo could continue for a lifetime about what he should have done to protect her and how he had failed her in so many ways. It was only the sound of her voice as she called to him that shook him from his thoughts and made him lift his mismatched gaze so it settled on her face.

"Do you remember...do you remember when I got into a fight with that yearling, for calling you a bad brother?"

"Of course." His voice broke through the silence that had enveloped them in her brief silence. How could he forget? He had been the one to discipline her for what she had done, remind her of her place as a princess. It was he that had to explain to her that sometimes you just had to leave someone to their opinion, because that was exactly what it was. An opinion held no truth to it, nor did it hold any hint of a lie.

He was silent again as his sister spoke, but he could not help but feel as if she'd driven a knife into his beating heart. He did not like to remember that she had called him a bad brother. As upset as he was with her, and as much as he wanted her to just leave him alone he did not hate her. "Il mio cuore." He said softly as she continued to speak, choking on her apology then proclaiming her hatred for Rasta, which was borne out of pure jealousy. "Did I love you any less when Hana was born?" To him the answer was simple. No. No, he did not love Lakota any less when Hana was born. If anything he found that he could love more. Could he not do the same thing with Rasta? Could he not extend love to her and draw her into the dysfunctional folds of their family?

"Jealousy is unattractive" He murmured as he gazed at his younger sister. "How would you feel if I told you that I hated the one you loved?" He had not been jealous when Lakota had found love the first time. In fact he'd been happy for her and part of him hoped that her lover would whisk her away into the night and save her from the torturous fate that her family had in store for her.

"I'm supposed to be an adult. I'm supposed to be okay with you falling in love, with...with you leaving me. But I'm not.... Non ti scordar di me..."

"You are foolish, Il mio cuore." He wondered how she would react to being called a fool, but she was acting like one. A jealous fool, but at least now she realized her mistakes and was apologizing. Her pride must be hurting terribly because he could not remember his foolish little sister ever admitting she was wrong about anything and apologizing. "Tu sei la ragione io vivo."

"."



Translation:
Il mio cuore - My heart
Tu sei la ragione io vivo - You're the reason I live


Lakota the Poisoner Posts: 278
Deceased atk: 5.5 | def: 9.0 | dam: 4.5
Mare :: Equine :: 15.1hh :: 7 Years HP: 64 | Buff: NOVICE
Aodaun :: Polar Bear :: Terrorize Brit
#5



It hurt to hear the crack of his voice, to know he was hurting as much as she to remember that horrible night. She regretted a lot of things, in fact she regretted most of the choices in her life. But that was a scenario she wished fervently to take back. Lakota hated that she'd hurt him, and she winced before continuing on. It hurt to remember, clearly it hurt the both of them. But all the pain was washed away with that simple, age-old nickname. Her frail shoulder slumped, as if all the tension had been dissolved and she was left weary and unsure what to do. She looked to him once more for guidance, only for shame to turn aside her gaze. Of course Leo hadn't loved her less when Hana was born, they'd just split the time they shared together. The intensity with which he loved her had never faded.

"Of course not...I'm so sorry, fratello," she murmured. But it was hard for her to accept, because Rasta was not her blood. She was a random mare, who had come and taken her brother away to an entirely different herd, until there was no time left for them to split. Until he had faded away, chosen Rasta over Lakota. Or so she had considered it. Whether or not she was in the right place to consider such a thing was debatable, but Lakota had learned that she needed to be more in-tune with her emotions. As much as she considered them a weakness, it promoted a more open relationship with her brother. And for that, she would do anything, no matter how uncomfortable.

Unable to withhold a snort of bitterness she smiled wryly. "I wasn't attractive anyways," she quipped, unable to help it. Only for her to frown at his continuing explanation. "I would have understood. Kept your contact with her minimal. Or so I like to think. Nothing, not even a mate, would come before you fratello." Whether or not it would have happened, well...it was in the past.

"I know. Fool is what I do, apparently..." she murmured, though her smile was tentatively warm. Hopeful. Their private language, their ties to the past she'd rather forget in any other term, was what sealed the deal in the end. Stepping closer, she chanced the ability to be near to him, just once more. "Where...where is she? I suppose...I suppose I should do my best to get over this. Stop being such a fool?" As much as she would despise having to apologize to Rasta, much less get to know her as more than just a name and face, Lakota owed her brother at least that.



WE ONLY EXIST IN TERMS OF THIS CONFLICT
In the zone where black and white clash

Resurgere | Wroth
Please only tag starting posts, spars, and threads collecting dust!
Plot with me here!

Alleo Posts: 115
Hidden Account atk: 5.5 | def: 8.5 | dam: 4.5
Stallion :: Equine :: 17.3 :: 12 HP: 60 | Buff: NOVICE
ali
#6

Alleo rolled his eyes at Lakota as she commented on being unattractive. If it were true she would not have captured the heart of a stallion so early in life, they both knew it, but he would not point that out. Memories of him always seemed to hurt her and he felt that they were better left in the past. It was his turn to snort when responded to his question. His little sister really was foolish, it seemed. "Family is important, Sorellina." he murmured. "But you cannot let your life revolve around around me or Hana... not if you want to create a family of your own with the one you love. No mare or stallion in their right mind would accept being second in the heart of their lover." He worried that she would misunderstand him and think that she had become second to Rasta. He worried that no matter how much he told her that that was not the case she would refuse to understand. And he worried that she would not accept that he had made room in his heart for more than just her and Hana.

"You will always be il mio cuore, sei la ragione io vivo. My Sorellina." His voice held a sadness that was nearly tangible as he spoke. "Even if you hate me I'll still love you with everything that I have, but you have to understand that..." He paused as he contemplated his words, tried to figure out how to say what he wanted to say. "I want to experience what you've experienced." he finally whispered. He wanted to be in love. He thought he had it with Rasta, but now he wondered if she had just used him as a bodyguard while she quested for her companion. Why else would she have disappeared without a word of goodbye to him?

Alleo shook his head when Lakota questioned Rasta's whereabouts. "I don't know." Came his honest answer. "She disappeared some time ago and has not yet returned." He was hopeful that she would return, hopeful that she had not just used him for protection, but the cynical part of his mind protested against his hopes and desires leaving him all but broken.

"."

Translation:
Sorellina - little sister
Il mio cuore - My heart
Sei la ragione io vivo - the reason I live



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