"Where brilliance is good and madness is better..."
Helovia Info
Helovia opened in February 2012! We are an active fantasy equine RPG
Where once the world narrowed into naught but gray dust and desolation, the gods called for life. Wielding the elements of fire and light, dark and wind, earth and water, spark and time, they have created Helovia. The realm is set within the mythical globe of Loorien, a planet rich with all variety of creatures and blessed with all manner of magic. Originally populated by nomadic, tribal characters, they've since grown into massive empires saturated with culture and history. Separated into four distinct segments of Helovia, called "The Regions," each band of horse strong enough and capable enough, took up the power and responsibility of leadership. Unicorns, old, wise and mysterious, took to the north, hidden in forests of mists and shadows and rarely making themselves known beyond their cliffs of the World's Edge. Equines, vast, organized and militaristic, split into two, one group went north to the Windtossed Foothills and the other group went south to the Dragon's Throat. Pegasus remained nomadic, making their homes in various parts of The Wilds in a migratory manner. For many generations, the land was peaceful and calm, but peace was never the way of the gods. With a clash of argument, war and bloodshed massacred Helovia, and in the aftermath, the realm was eerily quiet. Now, as newcomers sweep into this land, they are met with the lingering bitterness of the gods and the struggle to reclaim what was lost. Nothing remains safe or certain while sorcerers and soldiers alike brood and bide their time for revenge, honor and glory.
Site Wide Plots
Kaos :: The Beginning of the End ☼ - 6/2017 - Kaos placed Helovia in a time-bubble for a short period of time, but the Helovian gods are fighting back. But Kaos is powerful- far more powerful than anyone thought. This may be the beginning of the end of Helovia as we know it.
Kisamoa :: A New Kind of Kaos ☼ - 3/2017 - Kisamoa asks Helovians to help him restore the Spectral Marsh. Which side will you choose?
Invasions :: All Out War ☼ - 5/2/16 - New layout and the brand new invasion rules are up! Thank you for your patience and we look forward to getting started with this new adventure.
The Rift :: Gods Do Die ☼ - 8/2015 - Helovia Gods are saving the Rift from corrupt gods! Can Helovians band together against these foreign deities?
The Literal Ship ☼ - 2/8/15 - Oh no! You have to pair up for Valentine's day!
Sky Island :: Murder ☼ - 10/25/14 - Vesta has been found dead on the island, and the gods have called to you to solve the murder!
Sky Island :: Peace ☼ - 7/7/14 - An island has appeared in the sky! Clouds carry Helovians from the Veins to the sky.
Restoration :: We Welcome the Dawn ☼ - 9/21/13 - The sun has finally risen on this day, giving the land new light, but the Time God and the Sun God have yet to be seen.
Endless Night :: Broken Magic Plot ☼ - 8/30/13 - The earth god has returned and is walking across Helovia to heal the land. Every area can now be considered lush and prosperous, but the sun has still not risen.
☼ - 7/19/13 - The moon has risen in the sky, heralding the return of the Goddess of the moon. Lamp trees which light the paths have grown brighter, moon flowers which grow in dark places have begun to grow and prosper and the world is brighter, filled with a new hope.
Endless Night :: Dead Magic Plot ☼ - 6/22/13 - The gods of Helovia, in order to protect the world, have disappeared into the rift, leaving the world sunless, moonless and magic-less in their absence. Only the herdlands have a source of light, but lamp-trees with glowing leaves and branches sporadically line the popular roads and paths from place to place.
Doppleganger Plot ☼ - 6/20/13 - The God of Time is still struggling to close the rift though which the dopplegangers have come. He has requested that his brothers and sister assist in closing this hole, but without knowing why it opened, the task is proving difficult. Magic still remains faulty and hard to control, but the herdlands continue to be places of refuge for those who are fortunate enough to call these lands home.
ORANGEMOON cools off the lands with a a viscious force. Colder than normal, a sign of things to come during Frostfall, Helovia is bathed in a rich tropical lushness - albiet a cold one. The coastlines of the Dragon's Throat are pelted constantly by tidal waves, and the desert climate is humid but chilly. Ice begins to form early in the Aurora Basin leaving the winding trails slick and dangerous. The mists of the World's Edge coat everything in a glistening crystalline shine which encourages mould to grow everywhere. The Spectral Marsh is the only area which remains fertile, blissfully temperature and lush.
Cotm
Character of the Month for
June, 2017
WEAVER, Corporal of the Aurora Basin, is a relatively recent addition to Helovia and has taken it by storm. Branded with the seal of Death on her chest, intrigue and interest follow both her past and present. Though she is assuredly beautiful, her sometimes sharp personality reveals that there is more to this uni-peg hybrid than meets the eye. Proving herself able on the battlefield in the Basin’s warrior ranks, we can’t wait to see her test her mettle against the looming Kaos happenings! Congratulations!
Helovia RPG was created by Tamme and Blu and coded by Tamme also known as Schwartze. All coding, palettes and imagery are copyrighted to the website and are not for use outside of Helovia. Thank you to our ServerMaster for hosting Helovia. A special thanks goes to Neo for all of her coding help and fixing Tamme's errors, Boom, for her loyal service and creation of the Time God, and to Ali for her consistent contributions and dedication.
God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence
Behind the tears, inside the lies
A thousand slowly dying sunsets</style>
How did one welcome reprieve after so much grief? How did one simply… let go of all they had come to know? Even if I’d chosen to return to the Hidden Falls, I knew that a new life would be lying in wait… What kind of life that would be was still unclear to me and honestly, what would it even matter? The very thread that had tied us all together had been taken… and I wasn’t strong enough to face whatever fate the Falls now endured. Somewhere along my journey in captivity, I’d come to imagine only a grim future for those I’d come to call “family”- an uncertain future that I would not allow myself to share. After all, I’d always prided myself on self-preservation… It had never taken from me or disappointed me, but of course there was a first time for everything. Still, I hadn’t pictured my life this way after returning to Helovia and now I knew not how to proceed…
Would I simply forget everything and begin again?
Frustrated, I pressed onward through the Fields in hopes of forging my own path until all of this was too far behind me to remember. But, my memory was not something so easily erased. Death removed the flesh, the bones, and the presence of someone, but it did not quell the images of the past, the emotions shared, or the recollection of their laughter- though at times I wished it did. This was just another chapter in my novel of never-ending horrors in which I would remain the heroine, even if I died trying. After all, I just wanted to live… was that so wrong?
Yet, everything about my questionable future felt clinical and harsh. Here I was, running from the problems of my present and trying to ignore the pain of what would soon become my past. Call it unfeeling, call it what you will, yet there were but a few ways to survive and I’d been blessed with the ability of doing just that. I’d taught myself to persist when all felt lost and by leaving behind everything that weighed me down, I would be able to move on. I couldn’t imagine believing anything otherwise, because how did one live with so many burdens? The feeling of them was unbearable. I’d released myself from the duty of protecting Midas in the afterlife and I’d released myself from the idea of returning to a home that was no longer my own simply because I couldn’t carry them anymore.
This would be the last day I thought of Midas or Africa or any of them. I would embrace this fresh start in some way or another... or so I prayed.
However, so much emotion had made me weary and I was forced to pause in my departure from the Fields... Though being alone helped to soothe the maddening rhythm of my heart, the adrenaline had passed leaving me fatigued. While I tried to hide from the shock and the pain I’d witnessed in others upon discovering that Midas was- well, in short, I’d experienced a very trying day. I’d been freed from the Basin, from Ulrik, and from the Falls… There was no one left to concern myself with, aside from Romul of course. But, even the wolf appeared to be worried over my state of absolute nonchalance. Though, I knew it would pass and we would once again find ourselves unified. We always did.
“But, Essetia…” he murmured softly. I turned to fix him with a hard stare, but found only confusion and hurt in the depths of his golden gaze. I couldn’t find it within myself to scorn him for caring, even if I hadn’t the patience for weakness after so much pitiful sobbing on my behalf. On a sigh, I stooped to touch his slender muzzle with my own, attempting to reassure him of my overall wellbeing. He returned the gesture in kind, but I tried not to hear his quiet whimpering when our embrace was finally broken. We would be okay.
When I had righted myself fully, I turned toward a thin stream that ambled slowly through the tall grasses. The embankment was shallow and once I’d tested the stability of its ledge, I bent before the gurgling waters intending to drink. My throat was parched and thick with the bitter-tasting memory of the tears I’d shed. However, when I was confronted with my own reflection, the face that peered back at me from above the smooth stones and the sandy creek-bed was not one I recognized… I nearly laughed, or cried, at the sight. I was not who I remembered- at least not anymore. I’d changed somehow… But, I just wanted to be rid of it all.
Stupid. Foolish. Wildly illogical. Rarely were these words ever used to describe his actions, and yet here he was abandoning the powder-white safe haven of his home for the jungles of emotional and social madness. These were forest he had never before traversed, at least not in such tangible ways. His birth-home had burned to the ground, the effects weighing on Torleik and Bolverik far more. Ulrik had left his mother behind as he ventured far and wide with his rough, dim-witted outcast band, and she had died, wreathed in flame. He had not been there or spoken to her in years. In fact, he barely remembered feeling sadness at all.
For so long, Ulrik had abandoned his own feelings for logic and reason. The world followed patterns, a grand machine, and he was only one, predictable part of that glorious equation. In the end, his petty griping would not change the pathway of the universe, and raging against it would only make him miserable. Thus, he had lived quite a fulfilled and happy life, engaging with his machines and letting everyone’s troubles roll off of him like rain. Only Illynx had shown him that there even could be more – that having a child would open doors he never thought he deserved.
Then… she left.
She took their son with her, and that ache did not so easily go away.
Perhaps that was why he returned. Along his timeline, the blocks to his emotions were slowly lifted, and he wanted to release them with Essetia. As he walked, he realized more and more that he had no idea why he was going back at all. After speaking with Roskuld, the urge crawled into his gut, offering no explanation whatsoever. Never the type to show much self-restraint, he simply followed the urge, knowing that it was a terrible idea. Ulrik had never walked into such a bad idea before, and the very thought was incredibly uncomfortable.
Kirchoff had little more to offer than he did, and the hellhound only encouraged him through their mental bond. The hellhound was rather silent on his common and cutting judgments regarding Ulrik, finding this side of him less dense than his socially inept, brilliant apathy. For days, the black wolf followed without question, skirting the body of Midas for the narrow path leading to the apex of a small, isolated mountain. Cloven hoof and paw walked side-by-side as the two moved up the path, and as they crested the large hill, Ulrik felt rather exposed. He had come here maybe once before, but this was not his preferred location of leisure.
The sharp sides and cloud line obscured his footing, and he had a natural (and perfectly reasonable) fear of heights. But, he knew that he had to look for Essetia. When she walked away, she did not embrace her kin with the same sadness and loathing. She had seemed lost. Even he had been plagued by the weight of their blame, their accusations bearing down upon his massive shoulders. He hated them for their selfish stupidity and loathed them for blaming him for their own inadequacies. Yet, he kept his velvet lips firmly shut, choosing instead to take the brunt of their anger in turn. The mass that hung from his heart had been great, but that was like a shadow now… interesting.
Ulrik noticed that she was not up here – not so high. With a sigh, he turned and ambled down narrow path, but all was not lost. He was able to spot her red pelt from his current altitude, and he descended rapidly, his cloven hooves aiding in his excellent footing. She was drinking from a stream on an embankment, and he assumed they were close to the Hidden Falls from the distant roar of cascading water. The stallion approached slowly, neck lowered like a wolf entering strange territory. His lion’s tail hung low at his hips, swaying with each, massive stride. What was she looking at in the water? Herself? He had never paid much mind to his appearance – as evidenced by the sticks and knots stuck in his thick, black mane. All he knew was that he had two horns, had a black and bronze coat, and that his eyes were metallic – very little.
The stallion cleared his throat. “I will go if you tell me, but I wanted to ensure you’re….” He trailed, not exactly sure what he wanted to say. “Are you all right?” he finally asked after a long pause. Even that sounded stupid. “Nevermind. Obviously not. Are you going to be all right?” he finally rephrased. All of these social conformities were stifling, and he stood stiffly a few yards away.
04-24-2015, 02:23 AM (This post was last modified: 04-24-2015, 01:06 PM by Essetia.)
Essetia & Romul</style>
God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence
Behind the tears, inside the lies
A thousand slowly dying sunsets</style>
His voice, it was something unexpected against the quiet of my thoughts… against the quiet of my struggles. I feared what facing him would bring. I feared what I would again find in him… Had I been corrupted? Had I been misguided? Where was I supposed to run this time? Did matters of the heart possess a manual or detailed instruction? I’d never dealt with this. I’d never looked at someone and simply wondered. What in the Gods’ names was this?
Many times I’d fought him, if only because I couldn’t understand what in the hell his presence brought to my melancholy life. He was everything I detested. He was everything I’d come to hate…
Then why had he returned? Why had he followed me? I wanted to see him as nothing more than a criminal! He had done this to me! He had kept me from the ones I cared for and the ones I fought for! The Aurora Basin was the enemy! Did he not see what they’d done to me- what he’d done to me? The nerve! Who the hell did he think he was? Had I become a charity case now that I’d lost my footing? Well, if Urlrik thought I was too weak to determine my own fate, he was wrong. He was completely and utterly wrong. Even now as I looked at him, I felt sick. I wanted to scream and I wanted to lash out, but instead I maintained some minute amount of composure… Yet, was I really trying to impress anyone anymore? Surely everything I’d known was lost… Where the hell was I supposed to go?
I’d relied too much on my father and my life in the Edge. I’d come to believe in a family and their support, but now I was alone. I wanted nothing to do with the Falls, because it would never be the same… I didn’t care what happened to the Earth’s lands… I didn’t care what became of a life without Midas. I’d drawn my last straw.
----------------
Romul had alerted me to their approach, if only because he had grown accustomed to Ulrik’s companion, Kirchoff. The hellhound’s scent had resonated with Romul because living as a prisoner had not only affected me, but my wolf as well. Or perhaps my mind had trailed the Engineer during my times of need, even if I hated to admit it. He was the only one I found strength in during my capture… Ulrik was the only one I could depend on in the Basin. Yet, he’d done nothing to protect me. I’d learned to don my own armor; I’d grown from my own nurturing. But, it… terrified me. I’d become someone else in the Basin. Running from death and from the ones who had accepted me as sister and friend- well it was not me.
However, I couldn’t keep myself from hoping. This never ending struggle would never fade unless I was able to rid myself of its source.
I had to be rid of Ulrik and the constant questions he posed. Sadly, the Basin no longer represented hatred and prejudice for me- it represented Ulrik. It represented weakness on my behalf.
When I turned to face him, I was quick to hide any lingering shock or hurt lurking just beneath my cool façade. I tried my very best to appear calm and collected, no matter how overstated such a situation could be. Death was not something someone recovered from… “I’ll be fine,” I stated as simply as I could allow. I didn’t want onlookers to witness my mourning. I didn’t want this man to watch me break… I wanted him to remember me as the witty child he’d discovered in the Meadow. Maybe he would move on after his duties were obligated. Maybe he would forget me, just as any man should.
After all, I was not capable of feeling. My father had taken that from me.
“Why are you here? Have you come to tell me the truth behind your lies? What lessons tease me from behind those deceptive eyes?” I scoffed. My jaws nearly froze after such an accusation, but I had to conceal what I’d already seamlessly revealed. The softness of his gaze and the gentle curve of his lips… it was all too much. I didn’t want to trust him. I didn’t want to depend on him. He’d wasted me- dammit I still wanted him here. But…
I’d trusted him. I’d almost believed in him…
Why? What had he done for me…? What spell had he cast?
Please Gods… spare me from his smoldering gaze. I could take it anymore. I was so torn.
04-25-2015, 01:27 AM (This post was last modified: 04-25-2015, 01:30 AM by Ulrik.)
ULRIK the ENGINEER
So easily emotions absorbed rationality in all of their hatred and love. Infatuation and desire clouded reason, leaving the heart open for breaking and the body open for betrayal. Similarly, hate dulled the senses in a useful but foolish way – disallowing for logical assessment of others separate from prejudice. Ulrik rarely let such emotions control him, and he was a master for seeing things simply as they were. That was not to say that he was not troubled, angry, or sad, but he compartmentalized to the point where he completely lacked humanity. Objectivity came with a cool pride, an icy stare vacant and void of self until he became the very machines he created.
Today was not one of those times. Today he allowed himself to foolishly feel, and what he felt was conflict. He had no reason to care about this foolish, petty mare who was too weak to overcome all of his forces. He had no reason to be inspired by her strange and crafty beauty. He had no reason to hate her for blaming him for her own people’s sins. In fact, he should ignore her all together. Who was he to change a mind so stubborn and entrenched in such foolish notions and self-pity?
But yet he stood before her, waiting to be judged. He stood with a relatively open heart, knowing that he would get stabbed and left to die. Ulrik was stupid for doing this, he knew. But, no logic could turn his hooves now as he stared into white, unseeing eyes. It was as if they looked through his very soul – that color (or lack of color). Maybe that was why he stared so. What would she find beneath his layers – if there were any? Would she judge him and find him a simple engineer, heartless and iron like his creations. Or would she find a spark of redemption, buried deep beneath the abuse and deaths?
Part of it was pride. Testing himself. He would stand firm before the gaze of her judgment and smirk into her prejudice, daring her to bury herself deeper into a hole. So many outcomes. Which would she choose? Ulrik watched her carefully, bronze eyes tracing her body for subtle signs of unspoken words. He could guess only a few from the flaring of nostrils and the turn of her gaze. And so he spoke – honestly and truthfully. He was not here to taunt her, and somewhere, he cared.
She said she would be fine, but that sounded like a lie told to comfort one’s self before a solid break. He didn't believe her at all. Essetia could lie to herself all she wanted, but he would not be lied to – not so easily. Thus, he stood, unmoving and not acknowledging. Then, she scoffed – a poorly constructed and desperate barb at his attempt at kindness. Perhaps that emerged from her own pride and anger, not wanting him, of all the creatures on this earth, to be the one beside her now. Ulrik might had stripped her of her power by taking her to the Basin and keeping her from war, so it would make sense that she had to try one more time to bash her bloodied fists against the fortress of his will.
Ulrik lifted one corner of his mouth, but light did not touch his eyes. “Deceptive?” he asked. “I did not deceive you. What I said about my home was honest. The war was not ours, but from the Edge. We supported our allies efficiently and excellently as is our way in the north.” The Engineer cocked his head to the side – the gesture unnaturally innocent. “In what ways have I lied to you?” he asked honestly, curious as to what she perceived to be false. There was always truth in lies…
“I could not tell you why I am here. I am still working that out myself. But…” he trailed, obviously uncomfortable with the subject. He stiffened; seemingly growing in size as he defiantly lifted his neck as if to deny his own emotions. “I know what it feels like to lose everything, and I know that being alone with your loss only amplifies the grief.” The stallion frowned. “Hate is only cathartic for so long.”
Pausing, he looked at the ground, uprooting a small amount of metal. There, he created a small, mechanical bird. The little, metal sparrow had not the power to fly, but it jumped around, mimicking the behavior of birds while flitting around on the ground. He watched his own creation move around, not sure what to say – not now.
God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence
Behind the tears, inside the lies
A thousand slowly dying sunsets</style>
I’d never looked at him as anything other than human. I’d never seen Ulrik like I saw his machines; he was more than the metal and more than the formulas that made them turn… But, I had come from a different past. I had come from faded glory and a royalty that was no longer my own. My life had once been so promising before my mother had- I’d told myself that I was finished with death and its misery, but I had been so blessed as a child and now nothing remained. Maybe Ulrik and I were equal- two figures perched upon a single plane of understanding. Though I couldn’t decide what it was that we shared… what pains existed between us now that brought us any closer than before, despite the wrongs we’d committed?
Relaxing on a sigh, I settled into my skin for the first time in weeks. I was free to make my own decisions and to go where I pleased, but Ulrik was still there. He hadn’t cured my prejudices against the Basin, but his persistence had certainly intrigued me. Anger and loss had always been the pillar of my existence and they had been stripped because of my inability to remain unfeeling... As much as I wanted to simply hate him, I couldn’t. Wouldn’t.
Yet, how was I supposed to hide that fact that my time in the Basin had greatly affected me? Whether it was because they had robbed me of my family and home or because I’d simply donned a new appreciation for their faction was still debatable, but things had come to pass.
Opinions were so easily changed.
Even now, as I desired to summon the hatred I’d once felt for the Basin and for Ulrik, I could not. Everything felt like the hazy mists of the World’s Edge… Could I not simply return to my youth? Could I not return to my childish naivety? I didn’t want to grow up; I wanted to remain oblivious to life and to what was right and wrong. Morals held no bearing on my heart… but freedom did. The freedom to run and the freedom to sing and to dance and to be... how I missed that part of myself. However, that wasn’t enough… it wasn’t enough for me to remember. I needed to share my past; I needed to show someone.
I didn’t need a land full of mothers, fathers, sisters, and brothers to hear me. I only needed one- One what? Friend? Mentor? I wasn’t sure what I needed, but one day I would be able to answer my own questions. I would be able to determine what my soul needed to flourish… I just wished today was that day. Weakness had crumbled my defenses and I’d been coaxed from strength only to embrace the darkness that was death and grief.
Yet, I was not alone, even if I couldn’t discern why.
I poured over eyes of deep bronze, searching for something that was not mine. I traced the hard lines of muscle I could not touch, still wishing to find comfort against their taut curvature. Everything about Ulrik was hard and unforgiving and yet I found warmth simmering just beneath the icy fortitude constructed to keep me out. I’d never wanted to gain his confidence, only his favor, until he’d been compelled enough to release me from captivity… Still, here I was wondering. But, I didn’t want to press him; I wanted to forget him and the Basin and whatever tragedy awaited me in the Falls. I wanted nothing more than to move on from this moment and those that had segued into this loss of direction. I was stronger than that, wasn’t I?
I’d always told myself to find encouragement and instruction from within… I’d always been independent in so many ways. I’d always… been okay. However, Ulrik’s violent tongue and hopelessly attractive accent warped my every receptor and destroyed my every oiled thought… this newfangled, mechanical heart of mine, one probably crafted by Ulrik himself… broke.
The Edge… my home and my past…
They had caused this hurt. They had caused my suffering and my hatred and my…. I didn’t have the words. I couldn’t even find it within myself to remain unmoved.
“ You knew. You knew what was happening and you didn’t even have the decency to tell me. Lies or not, that’s deception,” I urged quietly. They’d robbed me of my fight, but there was no use in acting like I felt nothing, because I felt everything. I felt the flutter of my heart, I felt the heat of my anger, and I felt the guilt that made my skin cold. Was there truly any use in telling myself otherwise? Yet, it was not I who attempted to claim pride now. It was the Engineer as he breathed outward, his back stiff and straight with tension… What could possibly compel him to care? What compelled him to think that I was not permitted a mere moment of unabashed hate and anger and scorn? As far as I was concerned, this moment was entirely cathartic. Fuck righteousness, I just wanted to wallow.
“ You also had plenty of chances to tell me Ulrik! Yet, you chose to ignore the truth completely. Why is it that the Basin always involves itself in matters of anguish and war? What does that teach me about you, about your people? I find it humorous that you can compare our lives as if they exist in the same universe. You know nothing about me; you know nothing of what I’ve been through. I don’t need your advice when it comes to losing things, I’ve lost plenty. Call me pitiful; call me sad or weak- I don’t mind. This isn’t the first time I’ve dealt with betrayal and it certainly won’t be the last.”
Yet…
“ Why are you here? Why spend your time with me after you sought to aid the Edge in taking everything I cherished?”
Generalizations were always bad. See what he did there? He was not good, that he would readily admit. But, compared to all the wrong-deeds he had committed in his lifetime, actually helping Kahlua and her herd was on the spectrum of good. For once, he served his herd to help others – equines and pegasi no less, and he did so without reservation. Why then was she so upset? Why was everyone taking this so personally? Her friend died – Midas – but that was hardly a reason to blame him, and he marveled at the fact that he would be greeted as a friend by nearly any other herd now. Him! Ulrik!
Even Kahlua had given him a hug, and Ulrik saw her as a pacifistic girl. The Falls had stolen Lena, whom he rescued with threats of violence, and he was not bitching and moaning about that, now was he? Even with all this evidence, he did not open his mouth because in some way, he understood the need to just hate. The stallion sighed heavily, watching darkness start to cast its cloak over day, and the mechanical bird he made continued to hop around useless, miming the behaviors of its real counterpart.
Ulrik did not fully understand what drove him to stand here now. The red mare was intriguing, but she had a bare head just like so many others. Plain. Inglorious blood. Compared to his noble crowns fit for a king, cloven hooves and lion tail, she was miserably poor. In fact, he pitied her for her lack of pure blood, lost as she was in the ambiguity of mediocrity. And yet, he could not call her average. Something about her eyes – the way she carried herself… Well, it was anything but average. White eyes stared at him like snowflakes in the forest, and he was not sure he had ever seen a coat so red before.
She was alluring, and that was confusing. How could any ignoble blooded creature ever hold such pull over him? Torleik would roll his eyes at his thoughts, but he would dare his cousin to feel differently. Even he was with some dirty blooded freak, but she had a spiral on her forehead.
Was this weakness or evolution? The world changed and shifted, adapting to factors large and unyielding. He would be foolish not to do the same, right? His head hurt.
Ulrik grunted at her point, shifting his weight onto a single hip. “I suspected, but I did not know for sure,” he said. “When I first captured you, my plan was to release you once we got to the Aurora Basin, but when I saw mobilization for war, I held onto you. Good tactics.” The stallion blinked in her direction. “What difference would it have made if I told you when I found out or not?” he asked. “You would not have been able to fight, either way.” The stallion watched her curiously, trying not to infer more from her body language; she was hard to read.
“At least you know you did what you could, and you did not lose. From what I heard, your presence would not have made a difference, and that marks poor leadership and planning,” he said simply, holding neither grudge nor vehemence. It was simple fact. The better prepared and stronger herd would win, as they deserved. “I would know. I lost my first home by a breath,” he grunted, thinking back to fucking Mirage and her fucking dragon. The very memory of her brought a sour taste to his mouth, and he sulked for a moment.
Betrayal? They were not friends for him to begin to betray her! “I could have told you, yes. I didn’t. Again, it would have made no difference.” The stallion snorted, shaking his head. “We were at first very peaceful until we were forcibly removed from our first home. When the God of Time gave us his land, he ordered us to not make allies. My band has not had the best of luck regarding the rest of Helovia and their rumors and spite.” That was true. Prior to the Qian’s invasion of the World’s Edge, the group of unicorns had been unremarkable and peaceful.
“And similarly, you know nothing about me Essetia, nothing,” he grunted, taking a commanding step forward. As he lifted his neck, he seemed to grow in size – a looming, dark shadow of wild mane, beard and horns. “I am sorry you were collateral, but I did not purposefully betray you. Helping the Edge was new for me; I generally stay stuck to my machines and ignore everyone else for this very reason. You… others… are sticky… and…” he stumbled, grumbling a little bit and frowning. “And so few of you take the opportunity to see beyond your own hooves, feelings and ‘cherish’ to actually look.”
Ulrik frowned, dark, velvet lips in an unhappy curve. “I thought you would be one who could open her eyes and see beyond herself.” Maybe he was wrong. He held back the opinion that if everything she cherished was in the Falls then she did not cherish very much. “I did not want to give up on you so quickly, and I was…” he grunted as if the very thought of the feeling was uncomfortable. “… was concerned. I did not know Midas meant so much to know; I did not even really know who he was.”
Well this would sting. “I am sorry if you feel I betrayed you.” That was monumental for Ulrik, and he stood his ground, cloven hooves sinking in the soft Earth as he took a deep breath. Wary eyes watched her, wondering what she would do with this offered emotion.
05-01-2015, 12:46 AM (This post was last modified: 05-01-2015, 11:43 AM by Linds.)
Essetia & Romul</style>
God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence
Behind the tears, inside the lies
A thousand slowly dying sunsets</style>
The wall between us had grown thick and cold. If I were to press my cheek against the stone, I would hear nothing but the restive beating of my own heart. Everything he said was true. There was nothing to keep us together and no reason to believe that the future might conceal some other different fate. Perhaps this was goodbye… Wasn’t that what we’d been aiming for all along? I didn’t care where we’d come from or what we’d done since then but, I’d finally opened my eyes. I’d finally seen beyond my ingrained prejudices and my own selfish opinions. Maybe that was all I could ask of Ulrik; he’d already done his part in keeping me in the Basin after all… At least they wouldn’t have a Hidden Falls Sleuth at their backs any longer, as humorous as the idea may have sounded. Though I would miss who I was as a Sleuth and as a part of something greater… I would miss it all. Again I would lead this separate life in hopes of discovering the parts of my soul that had gone missing so many years ago. I had to keeping pushing against the forces that sought to slow me…
That was strength right?
Romul bristled at the thought and I looked toward the wolf with as much empathy as I could muster. This was not something that could be resolved in the presence of another, despite my reluctance to ignore his plaintive whines. Again, I would have to console the great wolf while he defied his pack mentality and again I would have to shield myself from the whiplash of his anger. I was his partner and his constant, beloved friend, but he was still born a creature of habit just as I. I couldn’t blame him for wanting something inherent to his species and it pained me to rob him of comforts he so desired… it pained me to the core.
In the passing moments of silence that stemmed and flowered between myself and the Engineer, I felt increasingly uncomfortable. The tension was nearly tangible as it radiated from within my bones and outward; I was at a loss for words. Although, I was still intrigued by his interest in me… he struck me as a rather reclusive individual, but he’d taken the time to trail me into the Fields- was it because he cared? I couldn’t imagine a man like Ulrik admiring anything other than his machines. He’d barely flinched at the sight of death. He’d been more fearful of the implications it involved than of Midas’ dying…
Yet, could I blame him? What would I have done, given his shoes to wear? It felt almost nonsensical that I held a sword meant for his heart when it was not one man who had brought down an entire Kingdom. I was entirely too selfish and too stubborn to admit my follies however. But, at least I was intelligent enough to curve their intent until we parted ways… “You’re right, but it doesn’t make the outcome any better, because I wanted to fight. I wanted to defend what was mine, no matter the odds… I don’t give up on things,” I murmured quietly, although it appeared to be toward no in particular. It was like I was trying to convince myself of my own worth, my own courage. How many times had I faced trials in life and found a way to win, to overcome? “My presence would have made a difference…” I started. “My part might not have meant victory, but I would have meant one more- I would have meant one more fighter to shield the blows, one more fighter to throw weight into the harness that pulled our family… Win or lose, I wanted to be among them, I wanted to share their pride or their sadness, and most of all I wanted to be there when the call to battle sounded. It might be my pride that compels me, and maybe that’s misguided influence, but I don’t mind. I was born to serve a greater purpose and I’d thought I’d found it,” I finished quietly.
“I don’t think you understand what motivates me or what pushes me to want and strive for more. I would have gone down trying Ulrik… and instead I was forced to endure the anxiety and the unrest, worried over something I was yet unaware of. It was that lack of knowledge that angers me the most… I needed to know what I was coming home to, because it was in fact my home, no matter how weak or unstable it was,” I started, growing louder. My voice seemed to rise with Ulrik himself, carrying me above the clouds until I touched freedom.
“I think that if I’d known, it would have made all the difference. I just think that you were afraid to find out what lengths I’d been willing to go to in order to ensure my family’s safety… and I think that’s what draws you to me Ulrik the Engineer. I will stop at nothing to do what I believe in…” I pressed. “If you were to ask me why you’d lost your home by a breadth, I would tell you it was because you didn’t fight hard enough, because you didn’t believe strong enough… I might have too much faith for my own good and I might feel a little too strongly, but I am everything I’ve ever dreamed of. I don’t need to know anything about you Ulrik, because it’s not mine to know. Yet, I am willing to show you my world- who I am. I want to forget the World’s Edge and the Hidden Falls and the Aurora Basin; we are but mere beings on this planet and alliances do not define us,” I stated while stepping forward, despite the resentment and the anger that had formerly possessed me.
“I see everything in time… and I am only learning, as you are too,” I finished resolutely. I wasn’t sure if he’d understand me or what I stood for, but if he did, then he would see that I was a woman who felt and who acted and who did when others would not. I did not comply to another’s rule simply because they required, I complied because it was something I felt passionate about. I lived and breathed as an individual and that was something that even the Hidden Falls could not take away from me. I had all that I would ever need within my own soul- within Romul’s. It didn’t matter how much life hurt me and made me think that I would not recover… I would always find a way. “Don’t be sorry… I already forgive you,” I soothed quietly.
I had but a few short steps until I was finally at his side, working to regain his confidence and his favor, as it had once been. Would I ever be allowed to rest a cheek against his shoulder… as I had when we first met?
05-02-2015, 10:45 PM (This post was last modified: 05-02-2015, 10:45 PM by Ulrik.)
ULRIK the ENGINEER
Ulrik would have fought given the chance – let’s make one thing clear. But, his duties had been more defensive as of late, and thus is began dabbling, not in war, but in strategy and stealing. Such subversive actions were not his preference, but he understood the necessity. Few noticed the black shadow lurking in the corners of the world, bronze eyes spying from a distance. For as odd as he looked, he remained a silent fixture in the world – an unknown name, and that was to his advantage. Many knew of the great sentinels that guarded the stony gates of the Aurora Basin, but few knew their creator, their mastermind. Mares turned their heated gaze to nobler stallions, ones who would become leaders, and he was summarily ignored. Not that he was complaining. He enjoyed solitude.
The stallion listened to her speak, explain why she thought she needed to be there to fight. Not giving up was…honorable, he supposed. He did not agree. When Psyche was losing the war against the Dragon’s Throat, he had turned his back on his enemy and walked away, not finding the fight worth his time when his leader had failed so completely. There was no use in fighting anymore. The battle was lost. Why waste the energy?
Shared pride? Shared sadness? Why? Why did she want to share the emotions of anyone else, and why would she want to be there to lose? None of that made sense, and to Ulrik, it never would. The notion of family was lost to him, except with Torleik. Torleik was blood. Cousin. Relative. He couldn't escape Torleik even if he wanted to, but Essetia wanted to make a choice to lose a battle just to be with those bonded for temporary reasons? Nonsense.
“A greater purpose does not necessarily mean a group purpose,” he replied solemnly. “Why would you want to feel their sadness when that would make you sad? Why would you go into a battle knowing you were going to lose? Would it not have been better to yield and save everyone the pain?” He asked sternly. Had the battle for the Edge so long ago been a heavily tilted battle, he may not have fought. But, the numbers were nearly equal, and the Qian had only won by a hair. So, he had participated for as long as he could – until Mirage wiped him out completely with her fat, scaled ass.
The stallion sighed, understanding her desire to know. Perhaps he should have warned her then – that made sense to him, and he nodded in agreement. “You should have been warned – I agree. I was not thinking at the time about anything except Midas’ body,” he grumbled, black lips curling down into a frown. He shrugged slightly at her accusation, having not considered that before. Ulrik was not afraid of what she would have done or what lengths she would have gone to – in fact he would have welcomed the challenge. Honestly, the thought never really crossed his mind. Though, he did not exactly want to tell her that, no.
“Wars are either won or lost. I fought with the rest of my kin bravely, but when three herds collide against you and the very goddess you served turns her back, my heart does not matter anymore. At some point, no matter how much you give a shit, the world will crush you with numbers or lack of skill. Both defined the loss of your herd, but for us… we were unlucky.” The conversation shifted, and his ears tilted back warily, narrowing his hooded gaze over vibrant, bronze eyes, seeing the way she stepped forward. What world was she wanting to show him? Death? Revenge? He was not so sure that he could trust her so quickly after all he had done.
She may be a curiosity, a strange little cacophony of emotion and spirit, and where she acted, he purposefully did not. Essetia was a fighter and he was a player, and there was a big difference. Fighters punched and kicked until their knuckles and toes bled, only stopping when dragged off the field. Players watched and waited, taking victories where they could be taken and weighing the outcome of the rest. He would guess that his way was smarter, and he strove for intelligence in all things.
Dumbfounded, he tilted his ears forward, as if trying to listen since he was sure he did not hear her correctly. Forgiven? Ulrik blinked, trying to understand why she would do that. Yes, that was one of his goals in all of this, but he did not expect it to actually happen. The stallion watched her approach still, wondering why she had gone from hating him to wanting to be close – not that he minded, she smelled nice. He tilted his head to the side and lifted one side of his mouth in a wry smile. “I do not understand you,” he said, the words almost humorous as they left his lips.
He could nearly forget that she was an equine. She had intelligence that surpassed the common rabble of all species, and that blinded him completely. "What is it exactly you want to show me?"
Didn't they say that only love will win in the end
Conversations were much like circles. No matter how many times one made the roundabout, they always ended up in much the same place. Our ideals clashed, our personalities repelled one another, and at the very best of times, we could almost tolerate each other. I was too flippant and hopeful for him to understand and he was too calculating and logical for me to understand… Yet, we chased the other’s tail in circles, looking to stop them from leaving or forgetting how we’d ended up here together. The whole of Helovia was so large and so promising that it seemed silly for Ulrik and I to waste another moment indulging the endless banter, but again I was here… chasing another hopeless dream.
Even after I’d shared all of my senseless half-thoughts and my many vapid opinions on life and family and personal development (though one could hardly call it such), I paused to gage the great stallion’s reaction. It had been many days since I’d last studied the bronze tribal markings that dipped along his shoulder or the tip of the small horn that peeked out from beneath his wild and unruly forelock. If I were to strip him of his titled in the Basin and his part in the, now obvious, invasion… who would he be? Who would Ulrik the Engineer be to me?
As I contemplated the idea, I listened quietly to the man who had once taken me captive as he told of purpose and the wrongfulness of shared emotion. Of course he didn’t believe in honoring the familial concepts that I’d been raised to value… He’d been raised differently. In fact, it was almost comical just how different we were. Ulrik had been almost frighteningly serious since the first day I’d met him in the Meadow, despite my ability to coerce a chuckle or two from him in a moment of forgetfulness. Maybe we got along because we were always forgetting who we were to each other and perhaps that’s just because we didn’t care. We were pleasantly opposites. “I don’t want to feel sadness… I want to share it so that I might be able to understand it and heal it. That’s what I was taught… I learned to be there for others and that in return, they would be there for me. It’s a fairly simple concept that someone from my past believed in. I’m not saying that it’s entirely right or that it’s entirely beneficial… but that’s what I know. He also taught me that when things get hard, yielding saves no one… especially not yourself. The guilt I would have felt for intentionally leaving them to fend for themselves while I spent my days resting, eating, and doing whatever I pleased… Well, it just sounds awful. There’s nothing else to it really… and in all honesty, I’m done talking about it,” I concluded.
I did not snap at the Engineer, but simply put the topic to rest. We could face-off for the rest of the day if we wanted, but it didn’t solve anything. Our differences of opinion were too vast to overcome. Besides, I wasn’t going back to the Falls… It was invaded. As far as I was concerned now, I belonged to no one… no group mentality to speak of. At least Ulrik would be satisfied with that.
The quiet fields all around us had stopped to stare at the spectacle we’d become and it was almost embarrassing how long we’d been at this; there were only so many times we could bump heads before we developed a bruise. Ulrik sighed, exasperated by my constant attempts to make him understand and I returned the gesture in kind. This was obviously going nowhere. Of course, he had a way of lighting a fire under my ass that burned long after his words singed the hair. Midas’ body… how many times could I get angry with him for that? Was ten acceptable? It was time that I tried to walk the high road, but boy did he make that increasingly hard. I grumbled in response to his admission and Romul followed suit, making sure that Ulrik understood just how touchy the subject yet remained.
When I turned to smirk at the wolf, I was again lulled by the lilt of the Engineer’s foreign accent. For a moment I tried to decipher its origin, but what would a girl born in Helovia know of foreigners? Perhaps that’s where the stallion had developed his sense of unfeeling or at least his analytical tendency to debauch every mystery known to… horse.
Which led me to the question of whether or not I was just another mystery that he had set his mind to solve… Surely I was less complex than the psychotic bitches in the Basin… I’d encountered some of them in my time there and they were certainly a little hotheaded. Though, I guess I was too.
Somehow, I’d managed to close the distance between us by a few feet and I did try to maintain some level of sense in doing so, but it was increasingly hard to determine exactly what I was after. Was I trying to accentuate my points, whatever they were? Or was I just… curious to see what it was like to be near him? I couldn’t image Ulrik allowing someone to test him as I did now, but I guess the answers to my questions were also written all over his face. However, shell-shock was not something I’d become familiar with over the years, even if it did look good on him, and of course he had to amplify that confusion by stating what all men thought about women. He didn’t understand me. I almost laughed and who could blame me? It was such an age-old opinion about women… Men couldn’t wrap their heads around us- and honestly, I think sometimes we couldn’t wrap our heads around ourselves.
Of course, to accompany that idea, men were also quite literal, which put them at a disadvantage. The laughter that I’d been holding in upon unsettling the great Engineer finally broke free and I couldn’t contain the almost girlish squeal that followed. “It’s nothing tangible oh-wise-one, I just want to show you that I’m not completely out of my mind,” I stated with an awkward, yet passible wink. “You said before that I don’t know you, but I’d like to… which also means that you’d get to know me.” Was that something that he wanted? Would he agree that I wasn’t utterly insane? Or would he think I’d just jumped off the crazy train and landed in his unfortunate lap.
Credits: Whit & Tamme are too fab | Image by Image
@[Ulrik] -- omg, direction in a post? Did Linds finally manage to get her thoughts together?
◄ Please tag Essetia in all replies! ◄ Force permitted, but no maiming or killing ◄ Pixel @ SongsOfInfinity
Ulrik was not bothered by time or the conversation. It make be making a circle, but all spirals were still circles. Though achieving similar shape, the velocity changed, sending the object ever closer to the center. Perhaps they were getting closer and closer to the matter at the middle, but he honestly had no idea. For once, sharing so many words was not an issue – not something that was dragging him down into discomfort and irritation, so he was not rushing to end it any time soon. Still, she seemed exhausted, so held back, taking a moment to listen.
He still did not agree. She did not either. Why would she want to share the sadness? Why would she need to understand and heal it? Sadness was not a bad emotion, and sometimes it needed to heal over time - not without meddlesome intervention. Essetia’s head seemed full of fanciful ideas and dramatic notions about the heart that he simply did not feel and would never feel, but that was part of what made her such a curiosity. She treated these intangible emotions as if they were concrete. How?
The stallion could agree to the last part though, and he nodded. “I left my… brethren to fend for themselves, but I did it out of disagreement. I was not forced,” he said, speaking of his past – back when he was still a yearling. “I can understand how that would make you feel guilty, and… I am sorry that you had to feel that way.” Apologies were rare, and trying to understand how she felt was even moreso. He was a creature hunting like a wolf to crash through naïve notions of the world, but she was so articulate and clear. Her argument was shockingly valid.
Apparently she was still upset about Midas, but he had no idea why. Ulrik did not kill him, and it was clearly apparent why he was nervous about returning the body. Emotions had this stupid way of clouding reality. Wouldn’t she understand that he did not want to take claim for a death when it was not caused by him?
His velvet black lips set into a grim line, and he waited patiently as she approached, closing the distance. Ulrik raised a thick, black brow and watched as she let out a girlish squeal. The Engineer almost visibly cringed, and he flattened his ears out to the side, squinting his bronze eyes against the pitch of her noise. What was that for? What could he possibly have done to deserve that?
Apparently that must have been some sort of noise of excitement and humor, and he carefully uncrinkled his expression, raising a curious brow. She sarcastically called him a “wise-one”, and he snorted. He supposed he was being a bit holier-than-thou, and he exhaled, looking back toward her with a self-deprecating smile.
Her next words were a complete surprise, and he blinked dumbly a few times. Absently, he wondered if she was getting at something, but she was in a vulnerable state. He didn’t anticipate that she was being manipulative. Ulrik smiled a bit, a weirdly honest smile that sat funny on his usually stoic face. “I can’t promise that I will be interesting, or that you will like what you see,” he prefaced. “But, if you want to get to know me, I will be honest.”
“And, I would like to get to know you too. Question for question?” he suggested, taking a bold step forward and clearing some space between them. He stood tall, neck lifted as he looked down at her strange, pale eyes from beneath his thick, black lashes.
Didn't they say that only love will win in the end
Our conversation felt more like disconnect than understanding, or like two waves pressing against one another until someone collapsed in the monsoon of our discord. It didn’t matter how much light I tried to shed or how many stars I tried to hang from the sky- Ulrik was not taken by my ideas of grandeur, and really, that was just fine. We certainly didn’t have to agree to exist or to converse or to simply part ways, but there was a glimmer of hope that I foolishly gripped to my heart that just would not be extinguished. I supposed there was some small piece of my soul that believed there was something bigger hidden beneath the crude layers of logic that Ulrik lived by…. But, I wanted more than anything to know if he kept dreams or desired the sweet tang of a fantasy or two. Did he ever just let go, or was he always so formal- so hard and regal?
Sure, he attempted to sympathize with me by sharing tales of disapproval in his past -tales likely fitted with black, silken lies- or how sorry he was sorry that I felt so useless. Yet, it mattered little when comparing our situations- I felt that I was needed and he was not. I wanted to regale him with only more argument to support my opposition, but what good would it do now? We’d reached an obvious impasse and no amount of logic on my part could sway a man so set in his ways. It was best to ride out the tide and move forward, forget that these words were ever even mentioned. They wouldn’t be remembered anyhow… “Well thank you,” I murmured reluctantly. Though you still don’t understand, not truly.
But, I would have to forgive him his inability to grasp the storm I presented; after all, we were nothing alike. I couldn’t be angry that Ulrik was a man made more of stone than flesh or that his eyes ticked like clockwork, always studying, always calculating something unseen. Even now as I peered up at him from beneath thick, dark lashes, his mind was working to provide a conclusion to all loose ends that hung limply from my open lips. I baffled him with my theories and vice versa, but the alternative was also a truth that I had a hard time swallowing. Of course deep rooted resentment for him still stemmed from his successful attempt to keep from my position in the Falls, but there was something else thriving just beneath the ash. The ember was still too small to be seen and yet it was a thought planted, a curiosity stoked.
Even as I watched his lips part, smoothing into an almost brusque smile, I could not help but stare. He was indeed a fascinating creature at the very least and one that was quite easy on the eyes- even I could not deny my appreciation of the man. Though, such fascination appeared almost unrequited… almost. I’d pressed my hand with a bit of light flirtation (though I could not say it was all that convincing) and the way the Engineer received my sentiments tugged a soft smile from my velvet lips. He claimed modesty in regards to personality and inner workings, which was not an unfamiliar reaction as I’d come to learn, but at least he’d agreed. I wondered if he knew that I already found him to be interesting, intriguing actually. He was like the answer to a problem that was just as the tip of my tongue, but one that evaded me time and time again. I was so focused on finding the answer that I didn’t care how close I came to, or how hard I pressed, Ulrik even if I hadn’t expected him to challenge me in return.
Yet, I was not backing down, no matter how tempting those bronzed eyes appeared or how muscular he- Was he trying to distract me? Surely he didn’t believe me easily swayed? “Question for question then,” I responded fluidly. But what had I to ask? It was clear that I knew very little of Ulrik and his life, but I knew some things, such as his passion for crafting machines… I also knew of his independence and his ability to solve problems logically and accurately. Perhaps I knew more than I’d ever want to confess, despite our rocky beginnings. “You first,” I urged. I was hoping that he would open the floor for our discussion because I feared where my own incentives might lead.
Credits: Whit & Tamme are too fab | Image by Image
@[Ulrik]
◄ Please tag Essetia in all replies! ◄ Force permitted, but no maiming or killing ◄ Pixel @ SongsOfInfinity
The thanks she gave sounded perfunctory, and he couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad thing that it was spoken at all. He wouldn’t exactly call himself regal or hard, but he was stuck beneath crude layers of logic. Wild mane that hung in tangles and vibrant, mad eyes were not typical among royalty, and the rolling of his massive, muscular shoulders and lifted neck was not from pride. In a way, he was posturing, making himself seem bigger than his size, and that had a reason. Though he was rather tall and heavy for Helovia, he grew up having to demand to be heard with a group of much larger men. Often, that was only achieved by shoving his body into small spaces and getting close into another’s space.
It was a tactic he used to intimidate, though he wouldn’t be able to tell you that in so many words. He was not actively thinking it when he moved, the actions having become second nature after so many years.
He was a mechanic. A creature of metal. He was a survivor and watcher, someone who rarely spoke but observed from the shadows. Ulrik spoke very little of his past, finding that most did not give a damn, and he was not exactly invested in anyone else. Now, he had blood relatives in Helovia, and he was closer to them than even they knew. Still, he did not engage, preferring to watch from beneath the hydraulic legs of his sentinels to feel close to those his heart claimed he cared for. The life was distant, sad to some, perhaps, but he was content with the way things where. That was why Midas’ death disrupted him so.
That stallion dying had shaken up his life, and he hated him for it – regardless of the fact the paint was dead. Maybe that was selfish, but the blind rage he felt that things had changed, without his permission, was uncontrollable. The fear he felt that his perch of anonymity was breached, crippling. Unfortunately, Essetia had been caught in that crossfire, but her presence had been reason to his madness and anger to his apathy. She had saved him from a foolish decision, and whether or not he would ever admit that, he was grateful.
If Essetia found him half as interesting as he found her, then he would be complimented. Something about her was downright unnatural, abnormal, and that was not a bad thing. She was like evolution, something greater than what was before – almost like a whole new species. He barely noticed that she did not have a horn upon her brow because she challenged him at every step, met him word for word and used a keen intellect to back up her emotions as if they were as logical as his analyses. Strange, strange creature.
And, she agreed to this question for question. Why? Nearly everyone had a motive, but for some reason, he got the feeling that she was swept away in the same storm he was, lost in seas of white and bronze. He stepped forward, and she still did not move. Interesting. She pawned his game off on him, and he smirked. He had a thousand questions to ask, and now he had to settle on just one. The stallion grunted in thought, jerking his head to the side to indicate that they should walk.
They had lingered here long enough. “Are you from Helovia?” he asked – a simple, easy first question.
God knows what is hiding in this world of little consequence
Behind the tears, inside the lies
A thousand slowly dying sunsets</style>
I had come to see Ulrik in an ever-changing light, with each day bringing new information to the surface in fragments of non-importance. It felt as though I was a puppet and he the puppeteer more than capable of stringing me up just enough to flap my lips while he pursed his own. As I considered the many things I’d told him of myself and how little I actually knew of him I felt a bit foolish, like a naive young girl unable to determine the motives of a more experienced lover. However, I lacked faith in whatever intimate knowledge the Engineer might have, given how much the stallion cherished his machines. I liked to believe him a mysterious creature with many secrets to hide and no reason in which to share them, but perhaps I’d been painting him in the wrong shades of grey and Ulrik was simpler than I’d come to imagine. Even then, as I watched him in the faint glow of the coming eve, I pictured him a brutish man with a loud bark and an even nastier bite… But somehow that seemed to fit Romul more than the man that Ulrik appeared to be.
As if I’d acquired a nervous tick, I found my stare directed away from the Engineer toward the field beyond. The grasses were still thick and green despite the coming of winter and I wondered what they might look like once the snow blanketed the mountain tops. I wouldn’t attempt the treacherous climb during FrostFall with the threat of backsliding down the mountain path due to an unseen patch of ice, but it certainly didn’t keep me from imagining the quiet beauty of such a place robed in white.
Romul too took delight in my musings by sending me pale images of the white capped plains. Of course they were not without my presence from one frame to the next. However, I only saw myself in ways that the wolf had come to see me. At times I glimpsed myself from behind and at others I saw only my shoulder and side… and yet each time he seemed to capture only a figment of what I naturally assumed myself to look like. He’d crafted me in too beautiful a light to be believable, but the emotion he shared in doing so made me smile absently to myself.
When again I found my attention returned to the Engineer I was surprised to find that he had succumbed to a sort of reverie as well. Since I couldn’t determine what went on inside his complex mind, I settled for trying to trace the lines of his face to pass the time. He was an increasingly handsome animal, perhaps a fine ale if one needed comparison. So often a good lager could be bitter at first, but the more you drank, the more it tasted of honeyed hops. Aside from that, being completely intoxicated often helped the matter.
However, all parallels aside, I was curious to know what kind of inquiries Ulrik had up his sleeve. I contemplated the many things a man of his caliber might want to know and still nothing came to mind. In truth, what else did he need to know? He had learned of my rank in the Falls, had seen firsthand my quick temper, and had even experienced the intense pleasure of seeing me ugly cry. It was a wonder he hadn’t avoided me from that day hence…
With the heat of embarrassment making my throat tight, I tried to distract myself by returning to my earlier study of the Engineer, but instead found the faint traces of a crude smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. There wasn’t much space between us now, but just enough to put my heart at ease, and when he motioned for me to follow his lead I was surprised to find that I wanted to. It could have been solely out of curiosity for the man or just a mindless reaction given I was so recently his captive. But it felt somewhat natural… even if I didn’t want to figure out why. Yet, when he proposed his very first question, I found myself coming to a slight pause at his side and backpedaling through my emotions. It was only a mere moment of indecision that forced me to reconsider his offer, but what would it hurt? What could Ulrik do with the information I revealed? It’s not like I was protecting anyone but myself. “Yes, I was born in the World’s Edge,” I answered loosely and without room for doubt.
I couldn’t find it within myself to admit my parents nor did I think it would matter, given my father’s short and unsuccessful reign. But it was my turn now and I planned on using it well… Forget knowing where Ulrik came from –he was here now— I wanted to know something deeper. “Now… I guess it’s my turn and I know we’ve discussed a great deal about racism in the Basin, but what about you? Did you join the Basin because of you aversion to other species?” To me?
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