Essetia & Romul

I needed to calm down, you’re way too bold to love

“Someone’s here…” Romul urges softly.

His words don’t come as a surprise, but they are strained, if guarded even. However, I don’t let his tension or wariness impact me as I’d done too many times before. In fact, it is only natural that we’d be discovered within mere moments, as bold as our approach had certainly appeared. Yet, it was still mildly disconcerting for me because I had come under the presumption that I’d have time to prepare. Upon seeing the island drifting off in the distance, with the water’s reflection casting strange yellow waves against its shore, I had anticipated a few hours to acclimate myself to the idea of belonging there. But, our time was up and the shadows had been pushed back by the light of day- it was time to sing or lower the curtain.

When the white wolf had managed to sidle up against me, his golden eyes peering off in the unknown future, I murmured softly against his titled ear. He responded in kind with an excited yelp before settling onto his stomach, alert. It was then that the lovely tiger-mare rounded the dusty rock formation in which she’d been hidden from view. She was quite literally angelic, a vision of heavenly light, that appeared all too out of place against the desert backdrop. However, before she could press me with question or introduction, I traced a path from her white-lashed eyes toward the fragile wings perched just behind her ears. It was almost cathartic to me, to find that my father had not been the only one blessed with dysfunction, despite the lingering distrust I suffered at the mere mention of his name. The past was not something that would ever let me live without its tainted grace and this mare was just another memory, painted with a different face.

The faintest whisper of a foreign tongue tickles my ears when the mare speaks and there is something forceful in the way she greets me. I bristle slightly against the soft grin that follows before nodding slowly, noting the woman’s reluctance to give her name. It appeared unfeeling that the Diviner would lead with rank instead of proper introduction, but in allowing her the benefit of the doubt, she had no idea who I was or what I’d come for. I assumed that she required some level of respect, given her position, before welcoming conversation or anything thereof. “Indeed,” I replied vaguely. “Though, I come looking to join you more than anything,” I concluded softly, attempting to appear more pliant than defensive. However, I figured that if the Diviner had any reason to send me away, it would arise simply because I refused to bow to her rank rather than to her name. I didn’t want tension and I didn’t want discord so I supplied her with a brusque smile before adding, “I’m Essetia and this is Romul.”

The wolf lifted his eyes toward the mare at his mention and remained silent due to my anxiety and mild sense of feeling unwelcome. Yet, before I could indulge the awkward sensation born of our apprehensive meeting, another winged woman (albeit questionably injured) found her way to our company. She was more amiable than the Diviner, though perhaps a bit rough around the edges. “I wasn’t aware anything was going on?” I answered confusedly. “Are you- are you okay?” It was the least I could do considering I wished to be granted entry to the Dragon’s Throat… Now was as a good a time as any to get acquainted to those I might call… family?

Essetia & Romul

I needed to calm down, you’re way too bold to love

There is a slight pause or a single moment in which the Diviner does not know what to make of me and that in itself makes me chuckle. It is a soft sound that trills like a songbird fluttering just above the heated sands. One might call it a moment of weakness while another might peg me a nervous intruder, but I knew in my heart of hearts that it was because she feared what I might do. The Priestess certainly didn’t look the warrior part, what with her soft charisma and slightly guarded nature, and it became apparent to me that if I were to pass into the Throat I would have to put her mind at ease. However, her satin gowns shift marginally when I admit my purpose for approaching her borders and there is a sudden glow in the way she regards me, a more proper understanding that gives her comfort. I stare openly at her as the pale wings behind her ears relax, going limp at the base, and reach down to brush the white of her cheeks. She laughs at this –a most lovely crescendo- and the trace of a smile follows shortly thereafter.

I nod slightly, an indication that I somehow understand, before she proffers explanation for her strange behavior. However, her response is neither one I expect nor one I rightly admire… The invasion of the Hidden Falls has little to do with the Dragon’s Throat- and then I wonder what she knows. What information can she supply me about the loss of my home and the death of Midas? What does this Diviner hold privy that I do not?

My eyes seem to wax over and soon I am seeing the world in a hazy fog of confusion. With news of the war still so fresh on my mind, I have to know how its devastation has travelled so fast. “That is understandable,” I reply vaguely. “I guess one can’t be certain who they can trust,” I add bitterly on a short breath. While the Priestess turns to acknowledge Romul, I attempt to rein in the heat of my anger at her mention of the Falls. It’s not her fault that I have lost so much and that I bear so much weight… but I am still glad to see that she misses the subtle clenching of my jaw and the tightness in my shoulders. I do not want to make a bad first impression by any means.

When the winged girl arrived I had thought very little about her introduction, or lack thereof, but the Diviner seems to think differently of the mare. She studies her injured appendage as if it might just offend her and the bite of her tongue makes me believe that she is just as judgmental as she is kind. I cannot read her face as she responds to the other’s inquiry, but at least her answer is truthful. Nothing is going on here… at least not to my knowledge. Whatever opinion she harbored of the situation was moot anyways. I had but two things on my mind, none of which involving the wounded Pegasus.

I allow the Priestess to introduce Romul and I to the flaxen mare, as if we are incapable of doing it ourselves, and I smile as politely as my concentration will allow. However, I bring my gaze again to the Diviner (of whom I assume has no name) when she relays my intentions of “joining their family”. It’s not a lie, I tell myself, but it’s not exactly the truth either. I feel it is more of a half-thought that came from a desire to seek out security… I didn’t need another family or another set of faces to forget. I had lost the last one; I wouldn’t do it again. For a time I am content to listen distractedly to their banter, if only to plan how I might entreat the fine Priestess to tell me what she knows about the invasion.

Essetia & Romul

I needed to calm down, you’re way too bold to love

She had eyes of sooty amber. They were painted with depth and curiosity, wisdom and understanding… But what did they see when she looked at me? What could they tell from the storm that raged behind my wild eyes? What could she determine from the way Romul stood guard over the temple ruins that were me? They were all questions that kept my mind from straying too far from the Diviner and all her oddities. A priestess with tiger stripes the color of rust, threaded in the faintest traces of red –of blood- and deep brown, with peculiar wings to match… She was quite extravagant and heavily decorated for a holy servant of the Gods. But it made me wonder if they’d foreseen my plight and sent the priestess to my aid. Maybe they’d warned her of how this casualty of war would come to find her way to the Throat. Then again, I hoped she was just as blind as the rest of us… I hoped she was too ignorant to see any more than I allowed.

Of course, I could also appreciate her wit and mild indifference when it came to my unwillingness to amuse her. “Fair enough,” I replied with a grimace. The Diviner certainly appeared to be a mare who kept to her own opinions and judgements, which was quickly becoming something I’d come to characterize her by. However, I wasn’t all too enthused when she thought it smart to question where I’d come from. We’d discussed the importance of trust, but that didn’t mean that I’d give it away so freely… Of course, I didn’t need the Gods condemning me for lying to a member of their counsel. The truth was the truth no matter how much of it was shared. The priestess was lucky enough that I hadn’t openly lied to her yet.

“My story?” I questioned amusedly. “I’m not sure you’ll learn anything of significance from it,” I assured before watching her gaze dance across the sands. It took the mare a moment to consider a plan of action, but she soon invited me to join her upon the dunes that surrounded the Dragon’s Throat and I complied if only to please her. Romul took my consent to be permission to again wander ahead of the Diviner and I, and I watched as he wandered about scouting out strange scents and frequented routes leading up to the water’s edge. “Perhaps it would be best if I knew your name before telling you my story?” I pressed as we began to trail the borders of her home. “I’m sure you understand my hesitation, given we’ve only just met.” It was a statement that carried the weight of an accusation and perhaps the barbs of my defensive nature, but if I had anything at all, it was most certainly a point.

As we ambled down the shore, I watched as the sun grew faint and hazy as if nightfall would come soon enough. But it was something I would welcome after a day spent so close to the desert. I wasn’t sure if I would become accustomed to the boiling temperatures that the land entailed, but I was determined to make it… real. “I’m no one of importance really. I was born in the World’s Edge– surely you’ve heard of it? I didn’t stay there long and have only recently returned to Helovia… Romul was always quite partial to the place,” I supplied with a slight sigh. “Ever since then I’ve been content to roam where I might and sleep where I liked,” I finished curtly. The truth is what you make it and I hadn’t lied…

“What about you? What’s your story?” I questioned nonchalantly. “You said something about an invasion… Did the Dragon’s Throat participate?” I’d managed to insert enough curiosity where it applied and drew enough lines so that the Diviner might be directed away from the subtle brimming anger that threatened to overwhelm me. I hadn’t seen the invasion myself and knew only that the Edge and the Basin had come together… Had the Throat been a part of robbing me of my home in the Falls as well? These were all questions I knew the Priestess could answer.

Essetia & Romul

I needed to calm down, you’re way too bold to love

Maren: a sensible name for a sensible creature. She seemed intelligent or sharp to be more precise and yet, somehow distant as if she were living far from the present… maybe in the past somewhere or even the future, but certainly not here. I couldn’t decipher which was more accurate and honestly had no motivation to know, even if the cryptic Diviner intrigued me at times. The way that she questioned and pushed me was enough to insure that Maren was always in search of knowledge or understanding. If a puzzle was set before her, she would solve it… which made me believe that it wouldn’t be long before she uncovered exactly where I’d come from. But did it truly matter what was behind me so much as what was before me? I hadn’t proven myself an ally just yet, but I hadn’t given her any reason to think I might be the enemy. In a way Maren and I were similar… we put reality before fantasy and our dreams before all the rest. I respected her for that- or at least I respected my own assumptions on the matter. Truth was what we told one another, but truth had a different meaning for everyone.

However, she seemed perplexed by my reluctance or my uncertainty rather. Hesitation? It was a single word that meant so many things, though only small things in my mind, and yet she focused on it as if I’d whispered secrets to her that no one else knew. Perhaps I’d done just that or perhaps I was hoping she’d catch the soft dipping of my voice and the sorrow that filled its hole. Either way, I couldn’t find the words to answer her question and instead let her curiosity –still unanswered- drift easily away upon the dry, desert breeze.

“A beautiful name,” I complimented instead, despite her unwillingness to let my complexities fall by the wayside. The Diviner was anything but dense and all the twists and turns I’d suffered to divert her did little to sway her determination. It seemed to her that kin was about trust and with trust came answers to questions of every depth. Yet, she didn’t know what images she was digging up and the bones she would find were everything but straightforward. “Family is a concept that I understand well,” I stated as we walked side by side. “But also something that is more than a word that stitches us together by law,” I continued with a slight grimace. “You stand beside me and call me kin, but what is it that compels you to say that? What have I done to earn such a bond?” I asked. I turned for a moment to study her as we talked and as we shared more about ourselves than we’d ever planned to do on such a bright and sunny, autumn day. “Forgive me, it is not my intent to offend, but I am truly curious. You say so much so easily… -I can only hope for it to be true,” I finished breathlessly.

For a time I let my words take shape in her mind and for what seemed to be an eternity we were both content to memorize the dunes and the sand and all of the land that made up the borders of our home. Was there another word for such a place? Would it be our refuge more aptly or just a prison in which we inhabited of our own free will…? Either way, its concept was anything but clear now… Maren had made sure of that.

I hadn’t been expecting her to know much of the Edge and from the way she said it, it was likely I was right. However, the topic of the invasion was another mountain entirely. Her knowledge was like standing at the peak and wondering if I could jump… It was like asking myself if I would rather fight to survive or freefall into something bigger than I was. Every word that passed her pale lips was like a barb –one that splintered deep inside- and opened a fresh wound across the surface of my heart. They could have saved the Hidden Falls… they could have stopped the war. But they didn’t and here I was, still estimating the distance between myself and the ground. “I suppose every great monument must fall at some time or another,” I stated grimly. Even stone could be eroded by water.

Before I could reconcile with my emotions and before I could pity myself for what I’d lost, the Diviner found a slip in the silence in which to insert her wisdom. It’s not that I hadn’t expected a sermon of sorts, but I’d wanted to grieve and to mourn and to wallow in my hurt. I guessed it was Maren’s way of bridging the gap between us and I was grateful, I was, but still sore and still silent as she regaled me with her past. She had come from a place called Deneb, a natural wanderer from what I could tell, and discovered the hardships of life in the wilds outside Helovia. It wasn’t so much the story as the lesson it embodied that was entirely relevant. Somewhere behind those burgundy-flecked eyes, I found a sense of understanding or a shaft of light that meant she knew more than she let on. I nodded slowly at the Diviner with her strange, outlandish wings and smiled.

“Thank you,” I whispered forlornly. Thank you for seeing what others could not. “I would still love to join you…”