It was spring now. The last time I saw the Rotunda it was covered in a blanket of white. Thankfully the chill and crisp edge of the air was gone and replaced with the smell of sweet flowers blooming in the distance. I made my way near the water’s edge, stepping in and covering my gold dusted pelt. It felt nice, wading in the chill of the water from the mountains. It was almost surreal as the weather grew into spring after such a harsh winter. I almost missed it, the darkness and closeness of the snow. I didn’t miss the ice covering the ponds and lakes though. The hot springs seemed to be too warm for me too, especially in the dead of Frostfall.
 
Coating myself in a casing of the water, I swam gingerly to the structure just off the edge. The same structure I had explored before meeting Rohan. He was such an interesting creature, and suddenly I began to wonder to myself where he had gone. Either way, I pulled myself up into the building. The stained glass painting different colors on my darkened coat, before I shook out some of the water that soaked up in my fur like a sponge.

When it came to thoughts and emotions, I felt quite numb. Everything that had happened to me within the last season left me that way. I began to try and forget anything that happened and anything that would potentially happen. I began to wonder if I could get away with meeting new people again. I wouldn’t be such a huge flirt as I had been before; no. I was too broken for that. Now was the time where I needed to admit to others the true person I was. I was a genuine mistake in every aspect of my life. And it was just now beginning to catch up to me.
 
Stretching out my legs, my joints ached with the constant walking I took up to clear my thoughts. It never really worked, I was almost always stuck in this rut. I couldn’t keep my mind away from Caleb and Tembovu, no matter how hard I tried and no matter what it was I did. I had hoped this walk would keep me from thinking of them. It hadn’t worked, and here I was standing in the middle of the stone structure, a being covered in a variety of colors on my cream and golden pelt, lost in thought.
 




Rexanna

A sigh had just been exhaled before blue eyes danced around the Rotunda a bit more. I couldn’t help but to try and look upon something beautiful to try to grasp my mind back from the depths. It didn’t seem to take much before I felt frustrated with myself. Head lowered, eyes now shut and dappled with the colors of the rainbow. I could hear the birds above me, chatting with each other and going on with their lives. It was such a strange idea, the fact that others were living their lives while mine was inevitably falling apart with me sitting in the middle doing my best to glue them back in place.

It would never be the same and I knew I needed to come to terms with that. A broken mirror pieced back together will never be what it was before. The sooner I learned that, the better off I was. However, as I wallowed in my own self pity, a voice rung out to me. “Hello Miss. I am Ilios I hope it’s okay that I’m intruding.” My eyes darted up and my ears flickered with slight embarrassment. Nodding to him, I lifted my head slightly and regained as much composure as I could before clearing my throat.

“Yes. However, you’re not intruding, friend.” I spoke out to him and offered him a small smile. He seemed as though he arrived with good intentions, dipping his head to me. I did the same to him, then spent a few moments observing the creature that had seemed to appear out of thin air. Had I really been in that much thought? Surprisingly, he was the same size as me roughly which was rare for me. His neck held a slight arch to it that made him look regal in a way and I couldn’t help but watch him curiously. His head seemed hefty, however his coloring was what distracted me more. He was quite green in a way with a base of an almost silvery complexion. He was paired with wings and a horn and I couldn’t help but to do my best from refraining of thinking of Caleb.

Then I realized I had been rude and not introduced myself. “Hello, Ilios. I am Rexanna. It’s a pleasure.” I said calmly, smiling lightly to him before taking a few steps toward him to close the gap between us two. The movements allowing the chain attached to my horn to dance to and fro. The stained glass rippling and moving with different shapes as I approached him. “What brings you here, if I may ask?” I nodded to him lightly. Small talk, good thinking. Maybe he wouldn’t ask me why I was so down looking. That’d save a lot of embarrassment for me.





Rexanna

Watching the hybrid stag before me, I couldn’t help but to notice him almost puff up as I gazed upon him. He seemed aged, weathered, but still looked handsome in a wise way. I began to wonder what kind of things he had seen in his lifetime, however long it had been. His appearance seemed to suggest that he had been through many things and her curiosity struck deep within her at the thought of perhaps he lived elsewhere before stumbling across this land known as Helovia much like she had. A history elsewhere to easily erase with nobody knowing what the past had. I nodded softly to him with a smile as he spoke to me. I dipped my head lightly before his next set of words hit her ears.

‘I was hoping to find out more about myself here.’ The words echoed in my ears for a few moments as he paused. I found it rather funny, considering that was exactly what I was here for as well. Except, as he continued, I wasn’t born there. Perhaps my story would have been much different if I had been, and then I began to wonder what kind of life someone has had living in this land all their time. Had they not wondered what was out there aside from this place? Surely some had to have been curious. Perhaps the others had left and never returned? That was a possibility. Especially for these creatures with wings.

Brought back to reality, ears perked to him as he asked what I was doing here. I couldn’t help but to emit a small laugh before shaking my head at my sudden outburst. “Ah, I’m here for similar reasons. I wasn’t born here, however, but it seems like quite the beautiful place to gather one’s thoughts.” I said softly, locking my eyes with his silver orbs. “You must feel lucky, being born in such a beautiful land.” I said softly before dropping my gaze. I had heard that I had been born in the desert. A dusty birth during a small wind storm that nearly caked my creamy coat into a chestnut. What a way to be born.

I glanced up to take another look at the stained glass that cascaded colorful streams of light. The movement making the colors glint off my golden horn accompanied by that single chain. Blue eyes striking as they stood with a black background of the eye liner that ran down my face. I allowed my gaze to dance back to Ilios, taking a glance at his wings once more. It was times like these that I wished I had wings. Two appendages that could carry me into the sky and let my feelings and worry sit back in the dirt of the earth. I wasn’t that lucky, however. I was stuck feeling these terrible pains of heartache with every step. The only thing I could do is try my best to keep going despite the searing pain. As far as I was concerned, I was doing a fairly good job at it.




Rexanna

I couldn’t help but to smile at the male. He seemed so genuinely kind and caring as he beamed his smile to me. The aura he let off was just such a welcoming feeling that I really hadn’t felt in quite a long time. His words then hit my ears and I nodded along with him. It was a confusing place; but wonderful in many ways. I was granted a home so quickly that it was almost unreal. However, I felt as though I proved myself again and again. I worked for the things that I had, honestly. However, I didn’t work hard in my relationships so it seemed. And that was my downfall for the moment. The downfall of destroying all hopes of love from both parties. Why was I such a mess?

My ears flicked away from him for a moment as I got lost in my thoughts. Perking back to him as I heard my name. I shifted slightly uncomfortable. Should I tell a perfect stranger that I was a lying whore? Or do I just ignore it and tell him I’m not interested? Being of the sneak class, I felt as if I shouldn’t have anything to do with letting others know my business. Especially someone that smelt nothing like an outcast. Perhaps a homeland? It was a scent I was unfamiliar with.

I caught his eye for a moment after he spoke; a slight uncomfort sitting in the bottom of my stomach. ‘You can touch them if you’d like, I won’t mind.’ Ah, so he had seen that I had been staring into the colorful plumes that lined his extra appendages. I smiled to him but shook my head lightly to signal that I wouldn’t want to creep him out by staring at them and wishing to feel them. The thought kind of made me laugh quietly. I wondered what impression I had on this stag if he wanted me to touch his feathers. However, before I could say anything, he approached me with a teal feather in his lips; setting it on the ground before me before his striking gaze caught mine once more. My expression a bit of surprise and slightly a bit of confusion.

I smiled to him, a genuine one right back. “Thank you Ilios. That’s truly kind of you.” I said softly before lowering my head and picking up the little teal feather and reaching around to place it somewhere in my mane where I wouldn’t lose it on the travel home. What a sentimental gift from such a stranger. Though perhaps it meant that he wouldn’t be much of a stranger at all anymore. Turning my aqua orbs back to meet his, I dipped my head lightly to him, thanking him once more. “I wish I had something to give you back, but alas I’m quite plain.” A small giggle escaped my chest. “I’m sorry for staring at your wings. Sometimes I wish I had a pair to escape things with.” And that’s when I paused.

I realized I had let him in on a little secret already. The fact I needed to escape things often? Great job. I shifted my weight again before exhaling a small sigh. “I don’t want to burden you with my issues, friend.” I offered him a small smile. Still trying to figure out what I could perhaps give him in exchange, but nothing came to mind. I was still processing the word he spoke earlier of the Throat. Was that the 4th herd I hadn’t ever heard of? I wondered what it was like.

“I have a question for you though. Didn’t pulling that feather out hurt?” I said softly with a small laugh. “If you’re ever in need as well to talk or anything, you have a friend in the Basin. Though I have nothing to give in return unfortunately.” I said softly; jumping from topic to topic in an uncertainty of what to do at this point. I had a slight feeling that I should tell him and perhaps he would help with advice? Or it could backfire in my face. Though at this point I felt desperate.




Rexanna