I liked the Falls, I really did. My family was there, Rhoa was there, I was still able to craft ... kind of. But some things were really frustrating and I guess it was because I was still comparing the Falls to the Throat. There were so many things that were different, like a distinct lack of leadership here, where Gaucho and Meg had always been around. I often found myself doubting my abilities to craft because I had no direction. I was scared to craft something that wasn't needed and waste my time on it. Sometimes it made me wonder if I'd made the right decision to leave the Throat, but I didn't often let myself dwell on those thoughts.

I had been feeling frustrated again and had been wondering over my decision and staying in the Falls when that happened it only made my frustration worse. So I left. I didn't have any particular destination in mind when I took off, I just flew until I got tired and didn't feel like flying anymore. When I finally landed I was near the stream that lead toward the rotunda. I'd only been there a couple of times, but the place was peaceful and quiet and that was what I wanted.

I sighed and made my way to the stream -- it was clear, cool, and refreshing after such a long flight. I drank my fill then lifted my head and looked toward the structure that was a mixture of rock, glass, metal, and fabric. Just as the first time I'd seen it I was struck with the desire to build something equally as magnificent, but this time I doubted myself. I turned my head away from it and sighed. The whole idea of leaving the Falls for the day was to relax but I was beginning to think that I had chosen the wrong place. The grove was only a little further north, and I wondered if maybe I should've gone there instead. Or the endless blue wasn't far away either. There was still plenty of daylight, I could head there and spend the day listening to the ocean and ... and thinking about the Dragon's Throat and how much I missed it.

Unbidden, I began to think about Rhoa and I wondered if he felt the same way that I did. As far as I knew he hadn't taken up any kind of job in the Falls since joining and ... and I hoped he wasn't upset with me for asking him to leave his home. I decided that I needed to talk to him the next chance I got and make sure that wasn't the case. In all honesty it was something that I was going to put off as long as I could because if he was upset about leaving the Throat I didn't want to know. I didn't want that guilt. It was bad enough that I had made him choose between me and his family. But I guess love makes you do selfish things, because I had wanted him with me. I still wanted him with me.

I should have found him before I left and asked him to come with me, I thought as I stared at the stream.

ooc://
this is terrible, but it'll get better :c

"."

Mother, make me
Make me a big tall tree
So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me

My head lifted at the sound of his voice and I found myself smiling despite all of my previous thoughts. "Not often." I admitted. "I usually do my best thinking in the grove or at the veins." I didn't need to ask why he was there, that much I could assume from what he had asked me. There was something about Rhoa that made all of my worries and dears seem trivial and silly. It made me wonder why I spent my time worrying over buildings and leaders when I had more important things that I could be thinking about. Like my future with Rhoa.

Before I could ask what he'd been thinking about he told me. My ears rotated toward him and my head tilted slightly as I listened. I didn't want to tell him what to do, though I thought he would excel at whatever he put his mind to. He had the strength to be a warrior and the fortitude to be a crafter, but I didn't know which path would make him happiest. "I just want you to be happy with whatever you choose." I murmured.

"-if I were to become a crafter again I suppose I'd be taking orders from you?"

I turned my head and nipped playfully at his neck. "I don't think I would have much to complain about if you crafted with me." It would be just like when we were working together back in the Throat. It had been fun and I'd looked forward to it because it meant that I was able to spend time with him. "There's so much that needs to be done and so little help." My worry spilled forth before I could reign it in, but I tried my best to anyway. "But, if we worked together again what do you think we should create first?" I could list off everything that needed to be done, but instead I waited for Rhoa's opinion.


"."

Mother, make me
Make me a big tall tree
So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me

"I could spend my days digging trenches and would be happy about it, so long as I could always come home to you."

I found myself smiling, though I would never wish for Rhoa to spend his days digging trenches. I knew what he meant, though. As frustrated as I was with the lack of drive to do anything within the Falls I was still happy that Rhoa was there with me. I think without him I would have lost my mind to frustration and anxiety. "I'm glad you came for me." I said and I rubbed my muzzle against the spot on his neck that I had nipped only seconds before. "And I'm glad you stayed with me." My head turned and my muzzled brushed against Rhoa's as he turned his head more toward me. "I love you." I whispered and I felt it within every fiber of myself.

Our conversation continued, once more, on the subject of crafting. Rhoa seemed to be just as lost as I was with what to do and what to build. It was a feeling that I didn't care for and I hoped that it was only a momentary lapse in action from Uncle Archi and Brisa. I nodded when he suggested something for the Earth God. "I was thinking about a temple for him." I admitted. "But something like that is too big for me to take on by myself." I sighed and sudied Rhoa's face for a moment. "I think, if we do build a temple I would like to have a statue for the Earth God there." I said. "...but also one for Hototo." I didn't think anyone would really mind considering Toto was the Earth God's son and had died to protect others. It seemed fitting to have something for him.

But I grew wearing of thinking and talking about crafting and so I stepped closer to Rhoa and pressed myself into his side. There were far more pleasant things to think about and as I stood there with him I let my mind drift. I'm not sure how my mind came to rest on the thought foals, but I could picture us -- the future us -- standing together watching our children play. I knew Rhoa already had a child, it was the thing that had drove us apart for so long, and I began to wonder if he'd want more. "Do you ever think about th e future?." I asked. "Our future?"


"."

Mother, make me
Make me a big tall tree
So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me

Rhoa was a lot more confident that I'd have help with building anything in the Falls than I was and I wished that I had that same confidence in my peers. "I don't know." I admitted uncertainly. "I've only met the other mason once." And that meeting hadn't lasted very long at all. "I just wish that I knew what to do ... or where to start. I feel useless."

It ... made me really happy when Rhoa admitted that he had thought about our future together in the Falls, though a part of me suspected that he'd really considered our future together in the Throat. I felt his muzzle press against my shoulder and listen to him say that we would spend our days crafting together and I smiled. His muzzle was at my back when he said that he thought about our foals. "I do, too." I said, and then he said he thought about making foals. I could feel my face burning because even though I'd thought about having foals I'd ... I'd never thought about making them before.

Rhoa's bite was something that was totally unexpected, but even more unexpected was that it made me pivot my butt more toward him. I turned my head to look at him over my shoulder and that smile he was giving me made me feel like butterflies were fluttering around in my chest.  I flicked my tail at his chest and found myself stepping even closer. It was ... strange, feeling the sudden urge to unite with Rhoa, to be one and possibly start a family, but I wanted the future he spoke of. I wanted to be a mother, I wanted to have foals ... but most importantly I wanted to have Rhoa's foals.

"."

Mother, make me
Make me a big tall tree
So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me

Thinking about being a mother wasn't something that was new to me. It had all started when I'd found Ryuu on the beach and had taken him in. Watching him grow - up in the point that he'd disappeared - had made me want to experience it again, but more fully. I had wanted to carry my own foal in my belly, I wanted to feel the life in there, I wanted to know that I was able to create something that wasn't just metal .. or stone, now. That want hadn't faded as the years had gone by, but with everyone disappearing one after another I'd begun to lose hope ... until Rhoa.

I didn't know why he was hesitating when I swung my hips closer to him and for a moment it was a very real concern. Had I misread him? This entire situation? Was he not ready to start a family with me? He took a step forward and I thought that maybe I was just being silly for doubting, but then he stopped again. His teeth against my flesh made me shiver and my heart beat harder in my chest and before I realized what I was doing I stepped back toward him.

I could feel his chest against me and his head rubbing against my thigh and ... he was making me feel like my blood was boiling -- like my whole body was on fire. Rhoa's question of "Are you sure" had me looking back toward him. "Of course." I wanted to say, but my voice seemed to catch in my throat and left me unable to speak. So, instead, I gave a faint nod of my head and pressed back against him.

-fade-

"."

Mother, make me
Make me a big tall tree
So I can shed my leaves and let it blow through me