"Where brilliance is good and madness is better..."
Helovia Info
Helovia opened in February 2012! We are an active fantasy equine RPG
Where once the world narrowed into naught but gray dust and desolation, the gods called for life. Wielding the elements of fire and light, dark and wind, earth and water, spark and time, they have created Helovia. The realm is set within the mythical globe of Loorien, a planet rich with all variety of creatures and blessed with all manner of magic. Originally populated by nomadic, tribal characters, they've since grown into massive empires saturated with culture and history. Separated into four distinct segments of Helovia, called "The Regions," each band of horse strong enough and capable enough, took up the power and responsibility of leadership. Unicorns, old, wise and mysterious, took to the north, hidden in forests of mists and shadows and rarely making themselves known beyond their cliffs of the World's Edge. Equines, vast, organized and militaristic, split into two, one group went north to the Windtossed Foothills and the other group went south to the Dragon's Throat. Pegasus remained nomadic, making their homes in various parts of The Wilds in a migratory manner. For many generations, the land was peaceful and calm, but peace was never the way of the gods. With a clash of argument, war and bloodshed massacred Helovia, and in the aftermath, the realm was eerily quiet. Now, as newcomers sweep into this land, they are met with the lingering bitterness of the gods and the struggle to reclaim what was lost. Nothing remains safe or certain while sorcerers and soldiers alike brood and bide their time for revenge, honor and glory.
Site Wide Plots
Kaos :: The Beginning of the End ☼ - 6/2017 - Kaos placed Helovia in a time-bubble for a short period of time, but the Helovian gods are fighting back. But Kaos is powerful- far more powerful than anyone thought. This may be the beginning of the end of Helovia as we know it.
Kisamoa :: A New Kind of Kaos ☼ - 3/2017 - Kisamoa asks Helovians to help him restore the Spectral Marsh. Which side will you choose?
Invasions :: All Out War ☼ - 5/2/16 - New layout and the brand new invasion rules are up! Thank you for your patience and we look forward to getting started with this new adventure.
The Rift :: Gods Do Die ☼ - 8/2015 - Helovia Gods are saving the Rift from corrupt gods! Can Helovians band together against these foreign deities?
The Literal Ship ☼ - 2/8/15 - Oh no! You have to pair up for Valentine's day!
Sky Island :: Murder ☼ - 10/25/14 - Vesta has been found dead on the island, and the gods have called to you to solve the murder!
Sky Island :: Peace ☼ - 7/7/14 - An island has appeared in the sky! Clouds carry Helovians from the Veins to the sky.
Restoration :: We Welcome the Dawn ☼ - 9/21/13 - The sun has finally risen on this day, giving the land new light, but the Time God and the Sun God have yet to be seen.
Endless Night :: Broken Magic Plot ☼ - 8/30/13 - The earth god has returned and is walking across Helovia to heal the land. Every area can now be considered lush and prosperous, but the sun has still not risen.
☼ - 7/19/13 - The moon has risen in the sky, heralding the return of the Goddess of the moon. Lamp trees which light the paths have grown brighter, moon flowers which grow in dark places have begun to grow and prosper and the world is brighter, filled with a new hope.
Endless Night :: Dead Magic Plot ☼ - 6/22/13 - The gods of Helovia, in order to protect the world, have disappeared into the rift, leaving the world sunless, moonless and magic-less in their absence. Only the herdlands have a source of light, but lamp-trees with glowing leaves and branches sporadically line the popular roads and paths from place to place.
Doppleganger Plot ☼ - 6/20/13 - The God of Time is still struggling to close the rift though which the dopplegangers have come. He has requested that his brothers and sister assist in closing this hole, but without knowing why it opened, the task is proving difficult. Magic still remains faulty and hard to control, but the herdlands continue to be places of refuge for those who are fortunate enough to call these lands home.
ORANGEMOON cools off the lands with a a viscious force. Colder than normal, a sign of things to come during Frostfall, Helovia is bathed in a rich tropical lushness - albiet a cold one. The coastlines of the Dragon's Throat are pelted constantly by tidal waves, and the desert climate is humid but chilly. Ice begins to form early in the Aurora Basin leaving the winding trails slick and dangerous. The mists of the World's Edge coat everything in a glistening crystalline shine which encourages mould to grow everywhere. The Spectral Marsh is the only area which remains fertile, blissfully temperature and lush.
Cotm
Character of the Month for
June, 2017
WEAVER, Corporal of the Aurora Basin, is a relatively recent addition to Helovia and has taken it by storm. Branded with the seal of Death on her chest, intrigue and interest follow both her past and present. Though she is assuredly beautiful, her sometimes sharp personality reveals that there is more to this uni-peg hybrid than meets the eye. Proving herself able on the battlefield in the Basin’s warrior ranks, we can’t wait to see her test her mettle against the looming Kaos happenings! Congratulations!
Helovia RPG was created by Tamme and Blu and coded by Tamme also known as Schwartze. All coding, palettes and imagery are copyrighted to the website and are not for use outside of Helovia. Thank you to our ServerMaster for hosting Helovia. A special thanks goes to Neo for all of her coding help and fixing Tamme's errors, Boom, for her loyal service and creation of the Time God, and to Ali for her consistent contributions and dedication.
Sometimes this thing happens where all things come together, by chance or fate or whatever, to swirl around and create a perfect storm of ASS that rages all up inside your head and your chest and it’s the worst fucking thing, man. I mean, I guess I don’t really need to explain that’s what was happening to me now do I? Why the fuck would I be bringing it up if it wasn’t relevant?
Dude no screaming at audience.
Shut the fuck up Cheek I don’t feel like hearing it.
That’s fair.
I’m sorry bro.
Eh, whatever.
We cool?
Ye.
Well at least that’s one thing I didn’t screw up.
Not like I was actually screwing anything up yet. I was doing what I was supposed to be doing, dragging along Kis down the Dragon’s Throat, where Ma had told me she would be. For the first time I knew exactly where I would be able to find her (yeah, that’s a bitter thought out of nowhere, whaddup) and I had a legit excuse to bother her peace of mind with a request from another person. Being useful ‘n shit, because as it turns out Kis needed a little extra prodding to keep from being a homicidal maniac. Did I know what was happening? No, I don’t, except she wanted to kill a dude for some reason and she wanted to forget his ass. And by forget I mean wipe that bastard out of her mind completely by magical bullshit means.
I figured Ma would be a perfect candidate for that kind of thing. Since her superpower was memory I bet that she would know a thing or two about the shit. Not to mention she was someone I knew who had actually had her memory erased before (which was a sharp jab in my side every time I thought about it), and I dunno it just seemed perfect that she lived in the land of the god that had done that to her in the first place. The irony was beautiful, goddammit (and it was another jab in my side, there we go, that makes two so far).
Did I have a right to be butthurt by this request? I mean, nah,not if it kept her calm and cool like the righteous asshole she’s supposed to be and back to normal and brought her peace of mind besides. But my heart tugged at the thought of it, anyway; that someone could be so wronged, so affected by a hatred or something they felt for another person that it would be better for their health and wellbeing if they just...if they just forgot about them all together to save themselves from the trauma of it. And that was the thirdish-fourthish jab because I didn’t know how to stack it up in my head like that, to view it straight with a clear eye. It was just there, a feeling I didn’t know how to deal with, and all it did was piss me off and make me silent and moody and angry as we made our way south, down to where the hot went over the fall and the winter months, down where fucking sand reigned supreme and was already making its way to its favorite little cozy spots directly in and around my asshole. Who the fuck thought sand was a good idea. Jeez. (That’s uh...that’s a fifth jab, I guess.)
We came up on the coast and there it was, not too far away in the gold of a setting sun: the isle of the Dragon’s Throat, because I dunno someone decided that making it an island would’ve been the coolest shit (honestly they’re not wrong). But I had forgotten it was like this and that there wasn’t a bridge so when we came upon the gentle waves breaking on the beach, I furrowed my brow and blurted, “Awgh fuck.” Finally breaking the silence, my temper not helped at all by Chico soaring above me on soft owl’s wings, chittering the laughter I had booming in my head because I have an understanding, compassionate asshat of a companion. The final jab.
Quit Hollerin' "Why God?", he ain't got shit to do with it.
Isopia couldn't even really remember much of their conversation on the way over. Her brain had been stunned into silence. The only reprieve from which had been a maddening buzzing in the depths of her brain-stem when she tried to articulate anything about what had happened. It felt like an unresolved blur. She didn't feel any better, but nor did she feel worse. If anything she just felt numb, as if the unchangeable reality of her past actions had finally sunk in.
It was all real. It had all happened. And it wasn't going away.
He wasn't going away.
So when Ros had suggested that visiting her Mother was a potential solution, Isopia was all ears. Given that she hadn't made some obtuse remark about Ros coming from a parent as beautiful and graceful as Ophelia was, should have been an obvious indicator of just how far gone her mind really was. She didn't even argue at the promise of having her memories removed, she was that desperate.
It was only really as they halted at the border, interrupting what had been a monotonous journey so far, that some sort of intelligence snapped back into Isopia's golden gaze. "What?" She asked flatly, her voice sounding like it was coming from under 10 layers of felt. Her wings had already unfurled slightly, catching the warm sea breeze that rushed to greet them from the ocean. Isopia had been to the Throat many times, and she couldn't discern an immediate reason for their pause. Pegasi - and hybrids thereof - were always welcome in the Throat, and as a daughter of one of their members, Ros's invitation seemed especially open. Now that her mind was thinking slightly less sluggishly, Isopia realized she had never seen any indicate that Ros even had wings, but the thought hadn't really seemed to pose a problem. She was a tribrid, as they all were. So she didn't have wings. Neither did the God of Time (or at least in the few instances Isopia had seen him, he wasn't sporting them). She assumed that Ros could just ... teleport across, or maybe the wings were invisible.
She was a demi-goddess. She had to be able to fly, right?
"What?" Isopia asked again, for the first time in her life possibly, she sounded impatient. And why shouldn't she be? The panacea for all that she had endured was just across the channel. She was closer than she had been in months to finally curing herself of her sins.
10-17-2016, 10:11 PM (This post was last modified: 10-17-2016, 10:12 PM by Roskuld.)
She was talking to me and I was ignoring her because pissed.
I was just standing there staring at the water gently lapping the shore line, glaring at it like it owed me money. Chico dipped down from the sky on soundless wings, a feather-light shadow resting on my back, shuffling his big clumsy owl feet as he squawwwed the laughter that was already booming in my head. Okay. Alright buddy. This ain’t fucking helping.
Did I have wings? I mean okay yeah sure, I had them, I’d always had them from the moment I was born. Not that I knew it all the time; when I was a baby they were so natural they were basically invisible. Like...how was I supposed to know that there were things on my back that were special enough for flight? Why would I unless I needed to fly?
And when would I ever need to do that? I could haul ass just fine on my own two feet.
Except one day Chico’s ass hatched for me and at one point he zpsnked into something that flew and then after that he was hounding me all the time to do it with him. Like...not outright hounding, just sneaky shit like offhand thoughts here and sly words there, along with an aerial loop-de-loop or whatever to spice it up and try and sell the concept to me. But...like...whatever dude sit your ass down I ain’t go time for that kind of foolishness. I’d been alive for so long and I ain’t never come across a situation where I needed my wings and I told his ass that if I ever did then he could rub it in all he wanted to and I’d just have to grit my teeth and take it and I dunno, learn how to fly I guess.
Welp, he was reaping his spoils. And I didn’t have a right to be mad. Now I had to fly.
Except I was mad and it was made worse by Kis being there witnessing this and having the nerve to act all impatient with me. Like--bitch I’ll slap the brown off her face fucking with me like that. I was the one trying to be helpful and take her to see Ma and get her shit fixed. She didn’t need to slip so easily back in her both-taller-and-holier-than-thou attitude about my shortcomings. That was a pun I wasn’t trying to make and it’s only making me even more annoyed and it’s getting harder to focus on the topic at hand. I’m having a hard time.
I ground my teeth because she needed an answer and I was trying and failing to come up with a good one. “I--”Have a cramp in my ass. But that didn’t even sound smooth. “I’m--”Taking a break. But that sounded like some weak shit and I was too proud to stammer it out. “I’m...uh…”Failing at coming up with something to say. I snorted then, because I was too bloated with red-hot air to even attempt a good lie, and if I didn’t let some of it out I’d probably explode. “I can’t--fly,” finally came the words, blustery and indignant, my eyes cast away from her and off towards the horizon that was so agonizingly out of reach by running.
Quit Hollerin' "Why God?", he ain't got shit to do with it.
Isopia listened with a sense of annoyed disbelief. Out of all of her cousins, she thought that Ros was likely the most learned. Was that because she was significantly older than Aithniel, and not as a naive as Mesec? Possibly. But despite Ros's foul mouth and consistent bad temper, Isopia had rarely seen her caught off gaurd in a way that made the earthen girl thing that her stouter family member was an idiot.
At least until now.
Isopia's top and bottom teeth found one another, and clenched down causing the muscles in her jaw to ripple. "You should learn." She replied flatly, probably falling right back into the perceptions that Ros had of her as pompous and condescending. But what of it? She had wings didn't she? And even if not, she did have the ability to fly (Ros had said that she couldn't fly, not that it was impossible for her to fly, which she surely would have done if she wasn't even capable of it). What else was there to say other than that she should learn?
"The Throat has ..." Isopia paused. It wasn't really a bridge, even though it acted like one. "A thing. Over there. We'll need someone with a key to activate it, but then it will take you to the other side." Isopia knew from past experience that the Throat seemed always to have guardians or warriors, or whatever they were called, lurking around the borders. The fact that they hadn't been greeted yet was actually quite surprising. The demi-goddess had no doubt that if they lingered near where the 'bridge' began, that someone would come and see to them.
"Come on." Isopia said, turning her mountainous body away from Ros and moving towards where she had motioned earlier. There was a tinge of desperateness in her voice, as if every second that they delayed somehow diminished the likelihood of this plan failing.
Or maybe it was that she literally couldn't stand to hold these memories anymore.
10-18-2016, 10:41 AM (This post was last modified: 10-20-2016, 11:25 PM by Odd.
Edit Reason: Tag
)
Ophelia felt... calm in a way that was not necessarily good. The feeling was complacency, and that particular emotion bred laziness, corruption and a softness she could not afford. Her two children were running around wildly in the Throat, and she stayed close to her family. That did not mean that she often wished for times when she manipulated the world, bending kings to her will with a silver tongue and mind like a steel trap. It had been too long since she vied for power and knew everything about everyone.
Secrets waited for her, itching for her to recover them, and even Tinek seemed a bit bored. He rarely stayed around her anymore, even though their souls were bonded. The silver dragon was focused on living his own life, siring children and participating in wild dragon hierarchy. Phi knew that if she needed him, he would come without question, but what need did she have of a dragon protector if she did nothing worth protecting?
Her expression was torn as she looked over her shoulder to Torleik and her two children, but she quickly turned away and wandered through the desert toward where she knew the bridge to be. Unfortunately, she was still lacking a key. That seemed to be moot, however since she followed another out earlier that day. Getting back in might be a challenge, but she would find someone eventually.
Much to her surprise, she stumbled upon her daughter and another she recognized from the fights against the rift gods. Ophelia tilted her head to the side curiously and approached without hesitation. They seemed to be waiting for access, but that was something she could not give - unfortunately. Her key had gone to Gaucho, and he had... well... he had passed. Phi knew she needed to get herself and her family out of there, but she needed to scout first.
The world could have moved on in her absence, and she would never know.
"Greetings," she said quietly, a smile on her lips that did not quite reach her curious eyes.
"Roskuld," she murmured, warmth filling her expression and voice for that single word.
"What can I do for you? Unfortunately I do not have access to the bridge. I only followed someone out this morning."
Undertow has come to take me. Guided by the blazing sun. Look at everything around us. Look at everything we've done.
Please. Anyone. I don't think I can save myself. I'm drowning.
Alright, serious question: why haven't you come up with a nickname for Isopia yet? You manage to delegate them to all your other friends- why not to the only one who actively doesn't want to go by her real name? You really need to get on that, because right now you look like an idiot, clearing your throat and stammering as you struggle to work around the fact that the thing you call your best friend is the thing you must never say aloud, if you want to avoid upsetting her. And you want to avoid upsetting her, you really do- especially now, after all that's happened, because it's obvious something is wrong. Even though you've just come upon the gathering you can tell that things are tense. It's the way Isopia stands, the way she moves, the lines of her face. You know your friend well, and you know that something isn't right (though when's the last things were right, for her?).
So you slide in, a blue bodyguard, unafraid to interrupt whatever mini-meeting is going on if it means you can set Isopia at ease. The stout mare you're sure you know, from somewhere, sometime, but the tall white one isn't someone you recognize. They're all taller, and you're a molehill among mountains, but that doesn't stop you from striding up with a bright (if uncertain) grin and a carefully shifting gaze. What they're all doing at the Throat is beyond you. You assume none of them live here, because the bridge isn't active and you know Isopia does not. Maybe that's the problem! Maybe they can't get in, and that's the source of the conflict, and not something deeper and having to do with you know what.
Wouldn't that be nice?
"What're you doin' here, uh... Pushta?" It's the only name that springs to your mind, the one given by the whale that gave your friend hers. There's a genuine concern in your usually cheerful voice, a question deeper than the one you ask. Are you okay? What's wrong? The tip of your wing brushes against hers, and you let your gaze shift between the strangers, that lopsided smile still on your face. "If you're tryin' to get in, I have a key," you offer helpfully, reaching down to pull at the amulet around your neck. Please let that be all this is. Please let it be easy.
You don't want to deal with hard right now.
Zèklè
Sigh no more, no more
One foot in sea, one on shore
I rolled my eyes before I could stop myself. “Yer-Sher-Leeeern,” I breathed in the barest possible whisper, my voice a sing-song mockery of Kis’ know-it-all attitude. It was the last fucking thing I needed at that moment because Chico was already rubbing salt on the wound and all my patience had been worn down miles ago. But at the very least, I guess a return to this bullshit from her--something I expected to come out of her mouth--and none of the silent, pained brooding that had been the norm since she walked away from killin’ a dude was a sign that, at the very least, something was beginning to heal.
And I was unprepared at how…glad I was for it.
I mean, still pissed obviously. Just….ugh fuck off.
She started talking nonsense about some bridge (I mean, hell, I knew about the bridge, I just forgot about it, whatever) and turned away from me, I guess in order to go look for it. Telling me to come on in the process. Bitch, I thought I was the one who was taking us here, the fuck? She turned away from me and I immediately stuck my tongue out at her, my eyes wide and my face pulled in an exaggerated grimace.
“Uh--” I stammered, my face clearing up in a second, “Oh.”
Cuz there was Ma.
Of course.
She wasn’t too close to us yet but she would’ve been near enough to see the noble, mature expression on my face. I mean, she was already greeting us, greeting me, like she was genuinely happy to see me. And I could’ve been agitated about yet another thing (looking like an idiot in front of my Moms ‘n stuff) but at that moment I was so caught off guard by the warmth of Ma’s pale presence that it melted the edge off my attitude. “Hey, Ma,” I said, and it came out a little sheepishly and I couldn’t stop a tiny smile from curving my jaw, “S’good to see you.”
I felt a zpsnk! and the weight on my back grew heavier as Chico switched to his beastly body, clutching at my wither as I felt him gaze at Ma intensely. I didn’t realize--Chico hadn’t ever met Ma before, had he? At least not face-to-face like this (remember, the last time I had seen Ma he’d been way too busy taking a shit). He’d seen her before, of course, in the form of my memories and dreams and nightmares that I had occasionally. And I don’t know if this was a sweet or a sour moment for Cheek, cuz he certainly didn’t know what he was feeling, but there was definitely a thing inside there.
*What can I do for you? Unfortunately I do not have access to the bridge. I only followed someone out this morning.*
I stepped forward, coming closer to Ma even as Chico crouched low against my neck, his eyes never leaving her. “Actually, you were the one we were coming to see,” I started, knowing I was gonna be missing an important introduction and hating myself for it but I could actually feel Kis about ready to explode and I thought (and Chico agreed with me) that we should get business out the way before someone committed actual murder.
“This...this is Kis,” I said, my eyes darting to the tall, brown drink of over-priced, sanctimonious asshole water who had dragged me I had brought here, “and she’s been having some...uh…issues with some memories. And I guess, since I know you have some…experience with that kind of stuff--” I tried not to let it sound bitter, I swear I did, “--that you could maybe help her with it?” I didn’t elaborate on the troubles she was having, cuz that wasn’t my business to throw out there. Hell, I didn’t even mention that she was another demigod, because that’s not the kind of shit I’d want someone to share without my blessing. I mean...I dunno. I shrugged a little bit. “Could you give her some options or whatever to make it--”
But then we were interrupted by a short what the fuck coming over and bouncing all up in our space out of nowhere. I stopped myself short, my whole head and eyes turning straight to the newcomer with a lazer-tight gaze, wondering to myself what even the hell a Pushta was.
Quit Hollerin' "Why God?", he ain't got shit to do with it.
Ophelia's arrival stopped Isopia before she could get very far - but it was far enough that she didn't hear the words whispered under Ros's breath, nor see the scowl and silly-face made at her retreating backside. She recognized the pale mare almost immediately - who hadn't heard of Ophelia? The mare ascended by the sun? It constantly surprised her that such an elegant creature could have given birth to Roskuld, but that was genetics for you.
Isopia dipped her quad-horned skull in greeting, spinning on her long legs to face Roskuld once again, as it became clear that they wouldn't have to cross the bridge after all. They had luck on their side it seemed, and the one they had been searching for had come to them. Ros echoed these thoughts, and again, Iso dipped her skull, this time in agreement.
Isopia could feel herself bristle slightly as Ros called her Kis. She felt both stunned by the comment, and weirdly wounded, as if hearing the affectionate name Volterra had dubbed her with coming from her cousin's mouth was meant to be some sort of slight. It felt like lemon juice in a paper cut.
Before Ros could finish, Zero arrived. Isopia couldn't recall a time in the past when she hadn't wanted to see him, and even now, with her sanity on the line, she was still relieved to see his exuberant form joining their group. Still stifled a smile at the name he called her, though it warmed the cockles of her heart in a way she hadn't thought was possible, given her current situation.
"I am called The Mountain that Knows." She clarified to Ophelia, though it was possible that the mare already knew that. Isopia was no where near as well known as the Aramanthine, but her lengthy monicker often proceeded her, even so.
Looking to Zero, Isopia offered a smile so weighted down by sadness, that her head drooped slightly. He knew what she had done ... But not what had just transpired. If Ros was to believed, she had nearly killed not only Volterra, but his dragons as well. It was all still a blur in her mind, and despite the progress she had made these past few seasons, it was no longer a weight that she could endure. "No, we don't need the key. We needed the Aramathine. And now she is here."
Turning to regard Ophelia again, Isopia's gaze kept finding itself drawn to her red eye, rather than the blue. "Yes-" She agreed, motioning towards Roskuld. "I have memories that I can no longer endure. She tells me that you can remove them-" Isopia swallowed. Admitting her mistakes was something she was poor at at the best of times. But having to do so in front of a complete stranger, her cousin and biggest critic, and her best friend?
But perhaps that was the price that was owed to even have the opportunity to speak her case. "I would pay any price you could offer to remove these memories from my mind." She concluded, her voice stern and unwavering.
She wanted to cast a look at Zero, but forbade herself. Isopia assumed that the boy would disagree with this decision. Something told her that Zero would demand that she hold onto what she had done so that she would never make such a mistake again, or because it was only fair to remember the bad things you had done, or something like that. Her mind wanted to accuse him of not knowing what it was like, but of course there were things she knew had happened to him which were worthy of forgetting - and even more things that she didn't.
Ophelia felt her own soul warm when Roskuld regarded her so openly. A smile turned up her lips with happiness, glad that she and her daughter had found positive, common ground on which to stand. More importantly, Phi was grateful that she was given an opportunity to atone for her past sins and do right by the brilliant and unique girl she could call her offspring. "Seeing you always brightens my day," she murmured softly in response. Compared to her reputation, such open affection and love most likely looked strange - but she didn't care.
Love was power. What did she have to fear with a full heart?
A companion - some creature she didn't know - popped up on her daughter's shoulders, and she grinned. "Oh look! How handsome," she said, taking a small step forward. "Greetings, Roskuld's guardian," she said, bowing her head slightly to the obviously powerful and devoted companion. As if summoned by this meeting, Tinek spiraled down and landed on Ophelia's hip, waving his talons in the air as a 'hello'.
The lighthearted meeting quickly evolved into a more serious one, and she furrowed her brows. Her smile was swiftly replaced with a frown when Roskuld spoke of her magic and all she could do was not once to acknowledge that she could help. There were no words for the disappointment she interpreted from Roskuld nor the nervousness she felt at someone coming to her to have them tampered with or removed. It wasn't as if she didn't understand, but she had chosen to live with the pain and a broken heart - even when the Sun god had given her a fresh start as a gift.
Phi nodded again toward the much larger, hybrid mare. She instantly recognized the child from the rift wars and wondered at her lineage. The hues and her relationship to Roskuld made her wonder if this could be another half-god.
They were interrupted then by a pegasus stallion with one wing, but her focus was entirely narrowed on the girl wanting her memories removed. For the mare to be willing to pay any price to have them removed meant that she had given this much thought, and Phi had been sought out for this purpose. "I can do what you ask," she said quietly. "But I will not accept payment. I know what it's like to forget, and I have suffered the consequences. Be it good or bad, you will pay in some way for your choices. We all do."
Ophelia's tone was gentle but serious. She was not attempting to dissuade "the Mountain" but instead offering what she knew on the matter like a teacher. The choice from here on out belonged to the girl, and she deserved all the information first.
Knowing there were prying ears and eyes, she used another gift and chose to speak directly into the other mare's mind. "Hello dear," she said warmly, offering a small wink of her red eye to corroborate the voice. "You can tell me or show me what you want removed, but I cannot bring memories back. Whatever secrets you wish to keep are safe with me. Are you ready?"
Undertow has come to take me. Guided by the blazing sun. Look at everything around us. Look at everything we've done.
Please. Anyone. I don't think I can save myself. I'm drowning.
If Ophelia's statement was meant to serve as a warning, or possibly a deterrent, it had the opposite effect. If anything, her words reassured Isopia. She did want to have to pay for the consequences of her actions, but retaining her memories weren't doing that ... they were just breaking her, slowly but surely, weighing down every step with no reprieve in sight.
Isopia nodded, before either Roskuld or Zero might say something to try and further dissuade her from this choice. It was the reason that she was here, and now that they had finally arrived, Isopia's mind could see no other option than to take the gift offered by the Aramanthine.
As Ophelia invaded her mind, Isopia tensed dramatically for a moment. Her nostrils flared, and despite the wink of reassurance the pale mare offered, her golden eyes remained large for a moment. Only as Hubris patted her neck slightly, did she relax. Of course, Isopia thought to herself, How else would she see the memories and take them, if not for being in my mind?
Closing her eyes, Isopia focused on the memories that she would have the pale former-queen take. Isopia felt self-conscious and mentally naked in a way that she had never experienced before. In any other situation, she likely would have shut down and evaded this sort of intimacy with another, but the demi-goddess knew that in this instance, there was simply no other option.
If she wanted to be rid of her past, she had to share it with one more soul. Just one more, and then it would be done.
Images of she as a child, meeting Volterra for the first time bloomed in her mind. His name of his dragon ... they had met again, and had help put out the beginnings of a wildfire (her wings against his body as they lay exhausted in the dirt). She thought of their conversations as they both grew (moving into her clearing. Using their magic to create the hot-tub that still stood there). The memories blurred faster now as Isopia concentrated (brief conversations. secret smiles.), trying to diligently ensure she retrieved every ounce of him in her mind, but also to hurry through the process as quickly as possible. Finally she came to the heart of it (they stood on a mountain. Their bodies touched for the first time and then ...) Isopia could feel her cheeks flushed as the memory of their coupling played out in her mind, clear and strong. And then, (pregnancy. joy. meeting Volterra's many children. dispair. Learning he had been with Aithniel as well. The spar with Ashamin. The loss of life. The stillbirth. The burial in her clearing.) and finally, (the two pegasus twins who had disrupted the grave and stolen the bones).
"Take all of it." She mentally pleaded to Ophelia. "I'd not remember that I knew him at all."
If the mare could take her memories, then she would take her love and grief as well. And that would be good.
They ignore you. All the women and their serious business- you're a fly to them. They don't even blink as you try to ascertain what's going on, don't give you the courtesy of treating you as an interloper, just go on as though you weren't there, continuing whatever bizarre ritual they're engaging in. The short one talks about memories, the white one talks about the price, and Isopia... Isopia talks about forgetting, and your heart leaps into your throat as denial and disbelief fill your mouth.
How is this a good idea?
But they're all on board, and before you can do anything, before you can speak, can look at her and beg her to reconsider, Isopia is nodding and there's a strange, silent seriousness, a degree of eye contact that cuts you out and leaves you lonely and bewildered, your sunbeam eyes turning to Roskuld for any sort of help. Why? you want to ask, to know. Why would she forget the baby she'd loved, even if it came with pain? What could be worth it- how could it be worth it, to lose a part of herself?
Poor, naive Zero- you know nothing of pain, of endurance, of the weight it can place on a soul. Who are you to judge Isopia, when everything you lose inevitably comes back? How can you judge, when the most you've endured is a couple of scratches and a season of heartbreak? Some nightmares of teeth and tongues in the dark? You can't- and you know this, so you hunker down and bite your tongue, waiting for Isopia to escape her reverie, to see what will come of this latest piece of strangeness to fall into your life.
Staring at your hooves, you spot a piece of malachite laying on the ground and bend, unthinking, to pick it up. You reach back and grab a strip of titanium from your silver side- if you cannot stop this, maybe you can remember for her, be the keeper of your loved ones' secrets when they become too great for your friends to bear.
Zèklè
Sigh no more, no more
One foot in sea, one on shore
Chico stared at Ma with wide eyes, and there was a buzz from interest in him that neither of us really anticipated--I guess part of him expected to hate her. But here he was on my neck, steadily leaning towards her, reaching almost, taking in her scent and her pale appearance, those dual-colored eyes that vaguely, vaguely reminded him of me. I smiled; I probably should’ve offered Chico’s name for him. But that’s not why we were here and pretty soon the two women got down to business.
I knew it too because of the way they fell silent; there was still an air to them that suggested communication (the eyes, the tenseness of Kis’ shoulders) but I figured all of that would be done mentally. I wondered for a sec how it would play out; like an alabaster comb going through tangled, blackened, matted brain-hair, catching the cockleburrs as it passed, leaving it smooth and neat, as it should be.
The short guy was throwing looks, seeming confused (just fucking leave already, jeez), but I didn’t have the heart to catch his eye. I didn’t have the heart for a lot of things at that moment; you can pass a deep, deep sadness for anger only for so long, and I could feel things inside me shutting down, unable to bare the thought of this process. Someone throwing a whole piece of their life away, of their history because it hurt them so bad. I wasn’t sure who was in the wrong; I wasn’t sure who was in the right. But I knew a dude and he was in love, and the feeling of the one being forgotten was scraping too close to my soul in ways I couldn’t reconcile.
I turned away from all of them--actually, fuck it, I walked off away from where memories were being destroyed and one small boy (lol) watched on with confusion. I walked over to the shore that had defeated me, looked over at the waves and wondered, once again, why I was still there. I did my part; I got Kis to Ma so she could do the thing. It ain’t like Kis was crippled, either. And even if she was, she’d certainly be fine in a few minutes and free to go her own way once all of this was over.
Things would go back to normal--I could see it now. She’d go back to being insufferable, cold, and better than everyone, especially now that her most human moment was willingly thrown to the wayside. It hit me in that moment, watching the Dragon’s Throat waters and trying to work up a rage again: I wasn’t sure if I was in the right.
I would’ve fucking loved to leave at that moment--but agh, Ma was here and I missed her, and Chico wanted to meet her fully. So. Guess I should stick around for the moment.
Quit Hollerin' "Why God?", he ain't got shit to do with it.
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