the Rift


Painful Expectations | Zikar-Sin

Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#1


T o l i o
more than meets the eye




Tolio was surely dying.

It felt like it. Even if no wounds appeared on the crimson canvas of his body, he felt as if he were withering away in the worst possible way. Lost. Flailing helplessly for the surface, because he surely had to be drowning. The only reason he hadn't completely broken was because the stronger side of him, the one he hid quite well, refused to let him. As he affectionately called it in comparison to his 'bunny' side, his 'lion' side was rather proud and wild and refused to let him stay down for long. Even as he wandered about in a daze, something intense kept him on his hooves. Forced every new breath and step. Tolio felt like he was a lost colt at times, and other an unruly being that was stronger than to be brought to his knees by a mare that manipulated him. So yes, with all the conflicting thoughts inside, Tolio definitely felt lost and floundering. Not to mention the dark and twisted creation that Psyche had made, turning him against himself. Both sides of his original being fought against this strange new being that held all of Tolio's thoughts. Essentially it was Tolio, but the stallion felt sick whenever he came close to realizing that Psyche had taken the dark and bitter parts of him and turned it into a perfect little racist soldier.

The Steppe had been his sanctuary. Away from the warmth the Time God had set up for them, it cleared his mind the best. Reminded him of better times. Of Mauja, Faelene. When days were simple, and he was merely a good soldier. He hadn't revealed his bunny side back then, choosing instead to fill himself with the warrior he knew he could be. Only Phaedra and Faelene could drive out the giggly, eccentric side of him. Today, perhaps, was a better day in comparison to the others. He didn't feel like he was going to break down, and the dark whispers from Psyche's...child had not appeared in his head. So a slight tremulous smile was on his face, hopeful that this would continue. Anything to stop him from feeling as if three different sides of him were all scrapping it out to take control.


Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#2




Yeesh.

Sometimes, it was quite easy for one to forget about the world outside of the enclosed valley. The Time God had certainly chosen a pleasant, pristine location for his children of Animosity to hide themselves from the bitter, grueling cold. However, that was the problem right there; it was indubitably pristine, the paradox being that time will march on, ever so vigilantly, without the slightest hitch and hesitation in its step-- while the Patron of this phenomenon granted a land that somehow escaped the ravages of time. The Basin never changed, save the Heavens that appeared above. It preserved its state well enough, and kept the beings within secluded and disconnected from their earth.

As such, when Sin traveled the hidden pathways that lead from the heart of the Basin, he was unexpectedly slapped with a gust of rather biting wind, quite forgetting that his home lay in the center of an interminable blizzard. Damn, it was cold. He snorted-- vaguely pleased with the foggy appearance of his breath before him-- and gave himself a bracing shiver before trekking out even further away from the Basin lands. The air here was thin and clear-- perfect conditions for thoughts to float from one's brain-pan to the next.

Sin's thoughts never died down; they were only differing degrees of turbulent. They whizzed to and fro, back and forth across the corners of his cranium, the buzz of his thoughts calming him into a pleasant lethargy of contemplation and contentment. He was happiest when he was thinking and imagining, and when he happened to spy another stallion as he traveled nowhere, the stallion was added to the list of things to be contemplated, and Sin was further driven to a state of easy contentment.

It was always impolite to stare, and Sin was a firm believer in gentlemanly etiquette, yet the from his vantage point the stallion wouldn't have been able to see Sin eyeing him the way he did. Always striving to notice and appreciate the beauty that existed in life, he noted that the stallion's vivid chestnut coat was rather pleasing to the eye, while his full and luxurious mane and tail did nothing but bolster the stud's appearance in Sin's mind. The addition of the noble ivory horn that adorned his brow cemented his grand appearance and justified Sin's liking. He was kith and kin, surely a comrade and maybe even a brother of the Basin. Sin's interest picked up; if this stallion surely was a brother, than Sin had best introduce himself. He was woefully ignorant of the roster of his own herd, and such ignorance was laughable. Sin definitely, definitely wasn't a creature of ignorance.

He approached the chestnut stallion then, holding his head high with rather unexplained pride and excitement. Sin was not one to read emotions, even his own emotions-- and as such, he was sometimes blind to the awkward, turbulent stirrings within his breast. "Hello, friend," he said evenly, as he got closer to the stallion, "Please excuse my intrusion, comrade; I'm not so familiar with these grounds as I should be and I must ask--are you of the Basin?"

As he got closer, Sin noticed the way the stallion's face was fallen and lacking in spirit. He paused, the gears in his mind working. It was obvious to many that this stallion was in great turmoil and misery, just by peaking into the poor soul's eyes-- yet Creation had withheld that sort of sight in his molding of Sin's character. As such, Sin could not see the stallion's emotional being even if he was aware of it, and so while he could see there was something off about the stallions' features, he had trouble interpreting them. Was the stallion in pain? Did he just have a fight? Sin's interest was surprising, even to himself.

"Are you....I beg your pardon, but are you well, comrade?" he hesitantly offered.



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IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#3


T o l i o
more than meets the eye




It seemed even Birdsong's influence could do little in the Steppe. It was too cold, too violent for the magic of the Earth God to touch. Perhaps it would remain that way forever, blanketed in white. Forever untouched, explored only by those thought crazy and ones who were too curious to stop themselves. For now, it was only the Basin members who dared to venture into its icy depths. After all it held fond memories for them, the home they had gone to after they were banished from their territory. Though Tolio hadn't been there for that part, it had still been the first place he'd ever lived in Helovia. These fond memories of Mauja and Faelene helped replace the ones that tore at his mind with a viciousness he couldn't keep himself from. Healed the wounds with gentle caresses of long past conversations and meetings.

Lean muscles were all that kept him moving, though he didn't trek forward. Merely shifting in place, plume flicking out at the snow idly. Tolio didn't have the bulk to survive off his own body heat, much too feminine and slim for it. Because of this he had to keep up constant movement to assure his limbs didn't fall numb. Movement over the snow had his gaze flickering away from the icy horizon, cranium tilting curiously at the stud that approached. Dark charcoal in color, with locks that spread all along his spine and a horn that Tolio had never encountered before. As he ventured closer, icy blue eyes met silver and Tolio gave a welcoming smile. His words were gentlemanly and respectful, and Tolio turned to face him better. "Hello as well," dipping crown respectfully in return to his kin. "Oh, don't worry at all! You're not intruding," giggling and smiling, deciding that if he wanted the bad memories to disappear he should extend friendship towards someone else. The Basin scent clung to the nameless man, but the ice must have dulled it on Tolio's for he asked of his allegiance. "Yes, I am of the Basin. Though I don't think I've met you...I'm Tolio. May I ask your name?" Settling back patiently with a slight smile as he asked this.

Smile dropped and sadness took over his visage when asked if he was well. If he hadn't known better, Tolio would have assumed the stallion was asking after his sanity. "I am well, friend. I have had my heart twisted by someone I saw as a sister, though she saw me as someone else. It is merely emotional pain, one I am trying not to linger on." Giving himself a finality with those words, shaking himself and straightening up with a glowing, honest smile directed towards his brother member.


Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#4





Sin noticed how the strange stallion's face transformed into something a little less bothering and abnormal as he was being spoken to. Perhaps it was the pull of loneliness that had put the undetected look of desolation on the poor chestnut stud; were he a little younger and spindly legged, Sin would have asked him if he knew where is mother was. Of course, the stallion was much older than a defenseless colt, and Sin supposed that he had no problem taking care of himself. With a slight jolt, Sin suddenly thought about Farai, thinking of how he missed her and wanted to see his darling Lady, but he forced himself back to the present to appear well-mannered and interested in the stallion. For he WAS interested.

"Tolio," Sin breathed, rolling the name off of his tongue; one might say that Tolio was a strange name, but Sin knew better-- ALL names were equally strange. "A fine title, yes of course," he nodded, "and I am called Zikar-Sin. A pleasure to meet you, sir," he said with a polite dip of his head. He lifted his eyes just in time to see the strangeness settle upon Tolio's features once more; a great dismay welled up in Sin's breast, bothered by the fact that he could not make heads or tails of Tolio's pain.

What hurt?

"I am well, friend. I have had my heart twisted by someone I saw as a sister, though she saw me as someone else. It is merely emotional pain, one I am trying not to linger on."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Sin insisted, quite sincere in his tone. It was a great indignation of being mistaken and underestimated by another; to be seen as something less of what you were on a dark night. Like a deer. Or maybe even a squirrel. Perhaps this nice young man had been met by his sister on a foggy morning, and she mistook him to be a polar bear or some other creature. The true tragedy, however, was that Sin completely missed Tolio's inference.

"If I may be so forward," Sin insisted hesitantly, taking a step toward the chestnut stallion, "but I must say it was quite foolish of her to mistake you for something you are not-- that is to say, something other than her brother. From what I see, you are her brother and nothing else--while she is your sister, forever and always. Life is full of these misunderstandings, however, so it's better to forgive and move on, and love her as a brother should love his sister, even if she sees you as different. The fog will clear eventually. She will truly see you in due time."

It would have been very deep and philosophical had the stallion not been literally thinking of fog.

Sin suddenly realized that he was speaking on such a personal subject, and that he was tamping all over it with his big, clumsy hooves. It wasn't his place; Tolio was a stranger for crying out loud! "I do apologize!" he said hastily, blinking his eyes for the first time during that encounter, "I hope you'll forgive me for prying into personal matters!"



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IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#5


T o l i o
more than meets the eye




Boyish face turned to Zikar-Sin when he rolled his name experimentally off his tongue. Tolio found everyone spoke your name differently, and was actually quite interested by that fact. Different intonations and sways to their syllables. Blinking widely at him when he said it was a fine title. Clearly surprised as he stared at him for a few moments before realizing what he was doing and glancing away. It wasn’t his fault that he’d never had somebody say that. "I…thank you," he replied, smiling softly. Laughing when Zikar-Sin called him sir, plume swishing against his legs and shaking his head while he giggled. ”Oh dear, don’t call me sir! It makes me feel so old!” Giggling softly as he tried to quell the little bubbles of laughter he was cursed with. Perhaps that curse was what also birthed him gay. It was an amusing thought. Turning his eyes to the darker stallion, mercury eyes sparkling with amusement. ”Can I call you Sinny?” Teasing but also half serious. He liked giving nicknames, it made friendships form faster and helped it stick in his brain. That and it was fun, essentially. The banter was distracting, and he found himself enjoying the brief conversation while it lasted. It was a shame that he had to breach the subject of Phaedra though, and it brought his mood down a few notches to remember everything that had transpired between them.

What surprised him, however, was Zikar-Sin’s apparent and rather sincere concern. Tolio found himself shocked once again within moments, eyes turning owlish once again. Then softening with gratitude, pleasantly surprised to find somebody who cared so much about him when they hardly knew each other past their names. After a few moments of silence Zikar-Sin stepped closer and Tolio let him, hardly even noticing the decrease in personal space. Tolio didn’t have a ‘bubble’, and didn’t mind at all. He was a rather touchy stallion, after all directly after meeting Phaedra he’d had his muzzle over her withers in a comfortable embrace. Without having any romantic feelings for her at all. He still doubted she had any for him despite Faelene alluding to such, but it made it easier to explain to Zikar-Sin. Completely oblivious to how the stallion was taking it in the first place. If he did, he would probably be amused and think he was adorable for his misunderstanding of the phrase.

Zikar-Sin never once blinked and Tolio kept their gazes locked the entirety of his speech, as if entranced by his words. Stuck in the limbo of his similarly colored irises as the words flowed through him and stuck directly onto his brain. Face softening more and more as he spoke, realizing quite suddenly that he rather liked the brute. He was forward, passionate. Almost intense as he spoke, probably why Tolio was so helpless to avoid his gaze. It was so unique, so new. Tolio was curious and excited to learn more about him, but was also deeply touched by what he had to say. When he finished Tolio was speechless in comparison to the multitude of words Zikar-Sin had spewed. No, spewed wasn’t a very good word. His speech had been eloquent, moving, touching. Spewed was a horrendous word to use in any way in comparison to Zikar-Sin. However his inability to form words must have given the cream maned stallion time to realize that he was intruding on a rather personal and sensitive topic for Tolio. In an instant he was nearly fumbling over himself to apologize, while Tolio looked on in confused amusement. It was endearing, in a way. So completely different from the composed manner he had grown used to that Tolio was nearly surprised. But he also wanted to coo at him, finding it absolutely adorable. It wasn’t particularly fitting, considering Tolio was much slimmer and at least a year younger. But he still had the urge nonetheless.

Giggles took over him once again, completely taken by the unique stag. Shaking his head slightly as he tried to stop laughing in his girly way long enough to actually speak, waving it away as he had no words to use. ”No, no! Not at all!” Finally getting the giggling under control he took a few breaths in order to stabilize himself and actually speak without seeming impaired, breathless, or simply idiotic. ”There’s nothing to forgive, silly. I wouldn’t have told you what was wrong in the first place if I hadn’t wanted to talk about it.” Smiling sweetly, sincerely. Keeping his face open to ensure that Zikar-Sin understood that he was telling the truth and was honestly unbothered by the fact that Zikar-Sin was, as he said, ‘intruding’. ”I have nothing to hide, truly. And you said all the right things. I feel much better now.” Lifting his eyes to meet Zikar-Sin’s again, showing the happiness and laughter that still glowed on his face. It was true, Zikar-Sin’s peculiar ways had successfully driven all unhappy thoughts from his mind.

Ascended Helovian

Mauja the Frozen Light Posts: 1,392
Outcast atk: 6.5 | def: 10.5 | dam: 7.5
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.2 :: 14 HP: 79.5 | Buff: HUNTER
Irma :: Snowy Owl :: Terrorize & Diego :: Eurasian Eagle-Owl :: Rage Neo
#6
It was to the snow he fled, when he needed safety — sanctuary. And now, he desperately needed it. He was not hunted, not by anything alive, but he felt haunted, by the world he had left behind. An odd dream, perhaps even shared, he could take. His own emotions, he could not, and so he had tried to not ponder them — no point in beating his heart bloody, if he wasn't sure he'd even touched minds with her at all. Maybe he was just going slightly insane, and not entirely mad. Maybe he'd manage to.. survive here, absurd as the notion was. Maybe he'd find a way out.

Then Onni had appeared.

Whatever went on here, it was driving him mad. Somehow these bits and pieces of his old life, of reality shining through into his sick nightmare, hurt so much more than being separated from them. He could take their familiar faces and unfamiliar personalities, for they kept changing all the time, so what did it matter if Psyche loved him one day and Snö didn't exist the next? It was mind-wracking as he had no stability, no clue what would happen, but he could sort of just take it in a stride and keep moving on. The world did, after all.

But these glimpses of life... They were what he wanted, what he had been forced from, but he was unable to return, no matter how close to their images he pressed himself. They tore at his heart in a way that the twisted alterations couldn't, and he'd left the Dragon's Throat ancient, now-gone forest behind and fled to the safety of the snows. Irma flew above him in the sky, keeping a sharp eye out in case Time would lurch again and spit him back into the world where the copies frolicked — right now, he was stuck in some variant of its far past, the odd tree breaking the horizon here and there a testament to that. He desperately wanted to avoid that realm of alternate selves.. better to be stuck here, where he was alone, than with the faces of his known ones paraded before him. Snorting out a plume of condensed air he kept striding through the snow, something purposeful in his step as his body worked itself warm and sweaty. He didn't care that it'd freeze on him later, he needed the movement to keep his mind off things.

And again, the boundary weakened, and the Frostheart's figure tracked a lonely path across the vast expanse of snow, not too far from the pair of stallions. He left no discernible trail in their world, the sky visible through his alabaster body — his path had no beginning, and no end.
angels, they fell first, but I'm still here

Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#7





Tolio's giggles had a more profound impact on the dappled stallion than one might realize; whether it was a part of Sin's unique, deformed mold of a person or the Gods had found it amusing to throw this odd little twist into the scheme of Reality, it was the case that Sin adored the tones of delight and despair. The reason why is a mystery-- it may have been the result of a traumatic past or perhaps it was Sin's way of relating to a sense that had been forfeit in his creation-- the sense of Emotion. It may also have to do with the parallels between the cries of agony and the laughter of happiness, as they sounded quite alike in Sin's opinion. Whatever the truth may be, Tolio's laughter rang like bell-tones within the void of Sin's breast, radiating and reverberating throughout his very core and creating a contentment so deep, he could listen to it for hours and not mind one bit.

But then the dappled stallion was really floored.

*”Can I call you Sinny?”*

It was such an unexpected question, and as such it coaxed an unexpected reaction; a memory of a tiny little striped thing wandering through the forest depths with nothing but the cry for her mother on her lips and the scent of decay about her. Sin remembered the powerful feeling he had upon seeing her, and learning her name; he remembered that all encompassing obsession for her well-being, how he wanted to keep her safe, to make her happy, to possess her. It was closest thing to love the damned soul would feel, and yet it was not; it was a twisted, corrupted travesty of the emotion, and yet it elicited the same symptoms as genuine love. For instance, it was a rare moment indeed where Sin's mind wasn't ablaze with thoughts and notions and schemes and ideas and dreams; where his consciousness wasn't trying to fill the empty void of the Question that replaced the heart he lacked. And yet here he was, standing in front of this giggling stallion, his mind completely dead. Everything was completely shut down, and Sin was drawing a blank. A voice in the innermost corner of his psyche was telling him how rude he was being to Tolio, standing there gawking at the chestnut stallion with misty eyes, but try as he might Sin couldn't get his cogs a'spinning and his jaws a' working into something coherent.

"Uh...." he stammered, his eyes alive with sincere shock and near-helplessness, "I, uh....." Sin closed his eyes and shook his head a few times, in an attempt at civil conversation and to bury his dreadful faux-pas. He found that if he didn't look at Tolio, it was easier to facilitate a response. "Yes, I suppose you may call me Sinny," he suggested, giving a weak, blind-eyed smile--

Suddenly, Sin's eyes snapped open, and his head whipped to his right, mist floating from his snorting nostrils as his icy, penetrating gaze swept the snowscape around them. It wasn't a thought or a decision that had warranted this reaction-- rather, it was an impulse, something Sin rarely acted by. Even now, as he observed the seemingly empty lands around them, Sin couldn't pinpoint exactly why he had reacted in that fashion. He tried to remember what it was-- the fading impression of a surreal sort of shiver that had wracked his spine only moments ago was fading rapidly, until Sin could no longer remember the sensation. He couldn't see anything different or shifted or out of the ordinary, and he couldn't explain why the snow seemed so dull now, supposedly having seen something pure and brilliant in its visage and nobility. An imprint of a unicorn was stamped on his memory, but as Sin investigated it, he could only see the silhouette of the Nightshade or Elizabeth-- pretty much any other unicorn he had met in his lifetime.

Sin looked at Tolio incredulously, then looked back. "Did you...?" Feel that? See that? What could have Sin asked? He wasn't even sure of the phenomenon's existence. He could have just imagined it, stressed by Tolio's sadness and the weird, unfamiliar things he was making Sin feel. A light film of panic misted over Sin's mind; he was uncomfortable with these feelings, because they weren't certain things. You couldn't contemplate them-- you couldn't figure them out. They are there to feel, not observe, and Sin isn't a stallion of feeling.

*”I have nothing to hide, truly. And you said all the right things. I feel much better now.”*

"I'm very glad to hear it," Sin said distractedly, though he was much more relieved than he let on. Tolio's happiness was a fact, an absolute; something tangible and solid within the spiderwebs of confusion in Sin's mind. And so he clung to it.

He must keep Tolio happy.



------

OOC: Sorry about late post, started this twice and lost it both times. Very angry. Still long-winded, though @.@
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IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#8


T o l i o
more than meets the eye




Over the years, Tolio had been frequently informed that he had a bit of a problem with surprising others far too often. He was eccentric, oblivious to the boundaries that people observed throughout their lives. Having had free reign his entire childhood; social norms and even small things such as personal space had no place in his brain. It had only furthered the strange looks others gave him, though his heart had weathered every comment against his sexuality. You meet one smart ass, you’ve met them all. They were surprisingly uncreative and uninventive in their insults. It merely amused him at his age. It’s not like he chased the tail of every stallion he met! Inwardly sniffing at the insult brought to mind, he drifted off into his own thoughts, though he was still half paying attention to Zikar-Sin. His shocked expression only made the giggling increase until he could hardly breathe. He was simply adorable, and Tolio was a sucker for adorable things. The shadowed brute stared at him, nearly gawking. Eyes wide and face in a comical array of surprise. Tolio merely tried to stifle the pealing tones of laughter that refused to stop, eyes sparkling with mirth. It was amusing to surprise people in such a manner, and he absolutely loved Zikar-Sin’s reaction. Blinking owlishly, he almost felt the need to coo over him. Waiting patiently with a sly smile, as if teasing him. Still soft as ever, as if physically unable to appear sinister in any way. His face was too boyish, too vibrant with emotions. Too easily read to ever appear in a fashion other than kind.

Reply came after a moment of stumbling through words that wouldn’t be completed. Even going so far as to close his handsome irises and shake crown as if to rid himself of pestering thoughts. And at last Tolio received his reply. Cheering joyfully, crimson tail swayed against his legs and pillars danced in the snow like a small child being told that they could play. Tolio had few nicknames, of them being ‘Toto’ and ‘Lio’. Not very creative, in his opinion. Then again Zikar-Sin’s name was just as hard to create nicknames out of, and Sinny was a rather popular one to be thought of. Even so, joy is cut short at a shiver that crawls up his spine like a branch drifting teasingly up his body when walking through the forest at night. Tolio instinctively knows that it is abnormal, and his core shakes with the need to get away. But he doesn’t feel fear in the present time. Something is familiar about it. Mercury eyes sweep the snow almost desperately. He doesn’t know what drives him, what tells him to look around. Why he’s desperate to find something at all. It’s like a faded memory, frayed at the edges and worn through care and time. A slip of paper folded in the back pocket of his mind. Zikar-Sin has disappeared from consciousness, and it’s then that he sees it. A flicker. Hardly enough time to register what it is. But he knows. All he needs is that brief image, and that faded little paper is suddenly brand new again. It’s a unicorn, that much is obvious and the first thing he recognizes out of the wraith. But the spots, the scars, the stature. Tolio recognizes it. Recognizes him. Even if it’s hardly discernible, even if the sky can be seen clearly through a figure not meant to be so ghost-like.

It had to be Mauja.

Before he could help it one crimson leg has taken a step towards the place where the image had appeared. Face crumpled, feeling as if he’d been struck in the chest hard enough to remove all air from his lungs. He wishes to race after that flicker of a picture, to call out like a possessed person to that stallion. Mauja. Mauja. Mauja. His mind refuses to let him believe that it’s merely a trick of the eyes, because Tolio simply has to hold on to the hope that Mauja is still alive. Still around. Mauja was his King. Psyche would never take his place, even if he’d knelt on knee to her coal form. Mauja was his ruler. If it came down to Psyche and Mauja, Tolio wouldn’t hesitate even a millisecond before stepping up to aid the FrostHeart. Tolio had sworn his very soul to that stallion, and he would not give that link over to Psyche. Not in a thousand years. Mauja had been a good, firm leader. In that moment he wishes that Mauja had remained. Hadn’t simply disappeared off the face of the planet like wind playing with the snow. He wishes that he could ask him what to do, because he took Mauja’s word as law. Beg him to lead him, tell him what to do in this mess he’d caught himself up in. It’s like his legs are tangled in barbwire, and his heart tells him that his King would have helped him out of it.

Then again, perhaps that is simply Tolio’s fierce loyalty speaking. He’d never believed so fiercely in someone before, and waited every day for their King to return.

”Mauja…”

Name slips unbidden from his maw, hardly a whisper. Full of emotion, longing and a passion that burns brighter than the fires in Helovia’s heart. His loyalty to Mauja will remain, even after he is dead. But remembering him means remembering his situation with Psyche and the creature she has created, and it hurts him all the same. Makes him wish for things that simply will never happen.

Zikar-Sin breaks him from staring off at the place where Mauja’s image appeared. Flustered he broke away and returned his gaze to the other unicorn. His incredulous words inform him that Sinny, too, saw the flicker of the ghost that had the ability to save Tolio’s sanity. ”I…yes…” whispering a bit breathlessly, eyes alive with shock. As if having truly seen a ghost. Is this just a mockery of the Gods, to dangle the image of the one Tolio needed to return before him? Was Mauja truly dead, and this was just some sort of game? Walls went up around Tolio’s already crumpled heart, refusing to allow that thought to take seed. He would always wait for Mauja, like the faithful soldier he was.

Soft, relieved smile broke through the heavy emotions on Tolio’s visage. Even more relieved is the laughter that follows. ”I’m surprised you didn’t turn tail and run! I’m afraid that most people find my happiness a bit excessive,” he admitted sheepishly, shyly. Afraid that Zikar-Sin would judge him for being such a bright soul in such a dark shadow of a herd. That he would be like the others and judge him. He feared it more than anything in the world, because he truly liked the stallion.


Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#9





The supernatural chill from moments before still shook Sin to his very core; the memory of it was a charred, faded thing, as though some sort of fire had erupted around it and burned it, blurring its features into something barely recognizable from the original. And yet it endured in Sin's mind and sense, teasing him mercilessly with some sort of knowledge and understanding that was beyond his grasp. It was unsettling, to say the least-- some would call it irritating. Sin found it downright infuriating. He ground his molars as he closed his eyes in prying thought; this was different from simple contemplation. In this instance, he was actually trying to recall something that might never have been there in the first place. He was trying to scratch his itch with a phantom limb.

*”Mauja…”*

Sin cocked an ear towards the chestnut, peering at him curiously through his spiral horn. He furrowed his brow as he contemplated Tolio; there was that serious, almost heart-broken look upon his features once more-- but there was a different element to it. It was such a subtle difference, yet somehow, though Sin couldn't relate to the hearts of other, braver stallions, he could read the tiny ebbs within their streams of passion with extreme accuracy. Sin detected no pain within his visage this time...Well, there was pain, but it was a differing sort of agony than what Sin had witness upon first visit. Then the poor stallion looked as though thorn-covered vines were tearing apart his innards and his very soul; this pain looked more desperate than anything. There was also his voice-- that tone and cadence dripping with reverence and respect as he spoke the name--for it was a name-- of a stranger. Hearing the almost wondering dedication in Tolio's voice made Sin shiver more than anything. It was a sign of greatness, for someone to be so devoted to another; Sin didn't imagine Tolio being of the slave type, to grovel about the feet and hooves of another without reason.

This "Mauja" must have been one hell of a horse.

Sin lidded his eyes, once again lost in his thread of thought. Was this "Mauja" the cause of the spectral "spasm" that Sin had felt not too long ago? It was apparent that Tolio had seen/felt it too, his stricken reaction was proof enough. Though as Sin tried to contemplate how another could induce such an effect on the two stallion's, Sin's mind once again became twisted and incomprehensible, full of nonsense and ephemeral things that weren't inherent Law. He couldn't take it. He shut his mind to the ravaging thoughts, focusing instead on Tolio's speech:

*”I’m surprised you didn’t turn tail and run! I’m afraid that most people find my happiness a bit excessive.”*

Sin looked up at Tolio-- then looked away again, filled with those same confusing sensations that had beset him earlier. He pinned his ears very briefly, annoyed with himself; what was it about this stallion that made him so tongue-tied? "No, Tolio, there is no reason for me to run," Sin insisted earnestly, trying his best and failing to make eye contact with the chestnut. He licked his lips, speaking slowly and carefully explaining, "Your happiness...it's a good thing, Tolio, there's no shame in it. I'm very glad to see your happiness. It's refreshing; there are many who hide behind masks these days. It seems it's the fashion." Sin chuckled a little at his own joke; a stray, wry thought crossed his mind, no doubt induced by his roguish feelings. It was a silly thing, honestly-- he had the desire to give a pet name to Tolio as well: "Lio". Sin didn't dare voice his thought, however, much less consider asking it, for risk of offense and-- well-- it was a thought associated with those wriggling feelings he had, and he didn't feel like facing them at the moment.

"So, er-- this Mauja," Sin said, beckoning with his body so that may start walking together; he was starting to get chilled just standing in one spot, "Tell me about him...or her," he added hastily. It was an attempt to get his mind off of those confusing things, although Sin was genuinely curious as to the identity of the Great one. As he walked, a peculiar scent came upon him; salt. His interest was stirred; was there even the possibility of a water source in this frozen wasteland? Did the sea expand this far north. Carefully angling their course for the smell of salt water, Sin walked with Tolio, listening and willing the stallion to keep happy and satisfied.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#10
 Tolio.</style>



Chill of the unnatural being, whatever it had been, faded quickly. Tolio was desperate to believe it had truly been Mauja, and therefore blocked out every whisper that tried to say otherwise. If Mauja was still alive, then he had hope. Hope was a dangerous and beautiful thing, all at once. It drove you to lengths a soul should never have to reach, but it also kept you from descending into a pit of depression and succumbing to the disease known as giving up. Hope was a devious little thing that landed softly upon hearts of innocent victims, either strengthening them or breaking down their spirit even further. Hope was what kept sweet mares with mates that would only wish them harm. It was what kept unloved foals trailing behind their families, hoping for a chance at redemption from something they quite possibly did not do. It kept you holding on, gave you a strength that would last seemingly forever. It got you through the worst of times, kept you from giving up. But it also kept you tied down, at times, to a place that would only further rot your soul. That was how Tolio felt. Hope was keeping him in the Basin, in a place where there was no love. He had believed in Mauja, in his ways. Perhaps he was not racist, but he would have done anything for the brute. Hoping for his return, for the ability to change and adapt to the Basin…that was what kept him locked so deeply in the herd. He didn’t know when he would give up, but wasn’t sure if that was the answer. Would it change, to become better? If not, and he finally left…what if Mauja returned? Tolio couldn’t stand the thought of Mauja being disappointed by his apparent lack of loyalty.

Yes, hope was a deadly thing.

It took a few moments for him to collect himself, though it seemed Zikar-Sin was just as disoriented by the appearance of some figure, some kind of ghost. Instead of lingering on philosophical thoughts he concentrated instead on the conversation. Yes, he could drown himself in that. Amicable by nature, talking with others was his specialty. He was simply born and raised to be an outgoing, boyish person. It made him a bit childish, but lately he’d noticed that it had been stamped efficiently out of him. With the troubles he had encountered, he had been unable to enjoy his fun loving, eccentric, naïve side. As if permanently stuck in the steely persona hidden deep beneath his seemingly weak exterior.

Zikar-Sin spoke then, and Tolio chided himself for again getting lost in thoughts. It was strange that he could not seem to look him in the face while they spoke, but Tolio remained smiling and encouraging so that the other stallion could see that he didn’t mind at all. Hoping to comfort him somehow. He chose his words with care, weighing them carefully and licking his lips slightly before speaking. An earnest smile softened Tolio’s face as joy and gratitude shone out of his visage. Zikar-Sin was a rare treasure in the Basin, and Tolio was almost unwilling to share him with the frigidity of the other members. He wanted Zikar-Sin and his kind, beautiful words to only be around him. If the other unicorn were ever to change, Tolio would be heartbroken. ”Thank you, Sinny. It does seem to be the latest trend, doesn’t it? I’m afraid my face isn’t suited for them, it slips off too frequently,” eyes twinkling as he giggled, playing along. Zikar-Sin made him laugh, and he liked that. Although he was finding that the movement he’d been keeping up had stilled with his appearance, and Tolio’s slim body was starting to shake to remind him that his temperature was slowly dropping.

Zikar-Sin seemed to feel the same way for he motion with his body to walk alongside him. Tolio tensed a bit and the same wistful sadness appeared briefly on his face when Mauja’s name fell from Sin’s lips. Quickly following the other man as he began to walk, though their sides were a bit close. Tolio didn’t really understand personal space. Tolio took a deep breath. Inhaled the scent of Zikar-Sin, strong and almost woody. The sharp, unforgiving cold of the snow that surrounded them, thankfully free of blizzards for the time being. And with a soft breath exhaled, letting a smile return to his face. Instead of focusing on the horrible despair he felt with Mauja’s absence, he would direct his attention to the immense pride he felt. The emotions he remembered feeling when they’d first met, how Mauja had quickly become a King he would kneel for. ”Mauja the Frostheart. He was King of this band, long before Psyche ruled. He was driven from his homelands by the Qian, and led his followers here to the Steppe.” This he had learned from Faelene, what seemed to be an entire lifetime ago. He remembered her differently, with burns keeping her from moving freely. That trek had been the very first budding of respect and admiration within him for her strength and determination. Her independence that he knew nobody could take from her. ”I was recruited by Faelene. Mauja himself came to meet me, welcome me. He welcomed me as a brother, as kin. He was proud, strong. But he was also willing to lay down and die for us, for any one single member in his herd. At least, that is the impression I got from him. He knew that withdrawing made him seem weak, but he would not have any of his subjects killed needlessly.” It had always been something Tolio admired about him, the fact that he cared more about his subjects than his pride. Tolio had come across far too many leaders who would fight until every last member fell, and then run for the hills like the cowards they were. ”He was the best leader I’ve ever known, ever seen. I would throw away my pride for him, kneel for him loyally should he return. I would quite literally die for him. Though I feel terrible saying this…this is for your ears only Sinny. But I will never accept Psyche as my Queen, not while I still have hope that he lives. I swore my very life and soul to him, to always serve him. He changed my entire life, and for that I owe it to him. He is my King, and I am his Servant. That’s how it will always be.” Voice taking on a firm, passionate tone. It was the truth, and only the truth.




Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#11





The cold was a little more bearable while the muscles moved. No snow fell from the sky, and yet as it set on the ground, frozen and packed with the tracks of many a wild creature, it still found its way into the tender frogs of Sin’s feet, burning them with the icy touch of miniscule crystal. The discomfort was lost on him. His eyes were wide and vacant saucers, as though they themselves were drinking in the tale that Tolio spun.

*”Mauja the Frostheart. He was King of this band, long before Psyche ruled. He was driven from his homelands by the Qian, and led his followers here to the Steppe…He was the best leader I’ve ever known, ever seen. I would throw away my pride for him; kneel for him loyally should he return. I would quite literally die for him.*

Tolio’s words washed over Sin as though it were a fantastic mist of enchantment, making the stallion react in many ways than one. He felt the same chill that had settled over his form mere minutes ago, though it didn’t come with the same phantom limb as before. It was a different shiver, brought on by certain events and evident facts—Sin had been right to assume this Lost King was a great man to behold, and Tolio’s fervent adoration only justified the hunch. It was actions like this “Mauja” that Sin could never fathom in his lifetime; they seemed inefficient and disadvantageous to the throne of a king; Sin had always supposed that the “throne” was that one place of perceived protection that many others would covet. Percieved because, as always, no one was safe from anything on Earth; as his studies with Myrddin had taught him, Ignorance is an absolute even in the best of minds. And yet this Mauja would throw away that inner sense of security and lay down at the feet of his subjects, breaking bread with them, marching with them to the front lines with his head held high. Sin couldn’t understand it--but the chill that ran down his spine sent shocks of respect to different parts of his psyche. He couldn’t understand it—but he could admire it.

Sin wished he could meet this awesome Frostheart, and witness that greatness firsthand….And yet.

Something else was twisting itself in Sin’s breast, something that clashed with the chill he was feeling from Tolio’s speech. It conflicted with every other confusing feeling Sin was feeling; the giddy happiness that branched from Lio’s giggles; the liking in his eyes when he beheld the stallion’s form; the swooping sensation he felt knowing that the pain was gone from the chestnut’s face and he was beginning to open up a can of genuine cheerfulness. This thing Sin was feeling—it was doubt, a curdled and disgusting pile of it, doubt and trepidation at Tolio’s passionate discourse. His doubts—and fears—were realized when the chestnut said the dreadful words:

*“Though I feel terrible saying this…this is for your ears only Sinny. But I will never accept Psyche as my Queen, not while I still have hope that he lives.”*

Treason, screamed the voice in Sin’s head, treason! It’s treason!

This was too painful to bear; the already awkward stirrings in Sin’s breast and his alarm at hearing blatant blasphemy were biting at each other, tearing their throats out and ripping their hides to shreds. Psyche was the Dark Empress; she was regent in this land and Queen of the Basin unicorns. There was no mistake on that fact. She was Queen when Sin was admitted a home in this twisted land with its twisted rules, and she remains Queen to this day. This…Mauja is nothing but a ghost and an annoying phantom in the corner of Sin’s mind. It was a colossal pressure in his lungs, and for a moment Sin’s breath hitched in his constricted throat. The Mind knew what needed to be said—but the Feelings that Sin was having was pulling them back, reeling them in and stuffing them back in his head. The Mind won out for the time being. “To…Tolio--” Sin started—and suddenly, he couldn’t speak anymore.

*“This is for your ears only Sinny.”*

He must keep Tolio happy.

Sin was surely going insane from this. If this was how normal beings lived on this gods-forsaken rock, then he suddenly understood every war he had witnessed in his short life. “He…sounds like an impressive stallion, Lio,” Sin finally said, the truth gushing out. It was so honest that he quite forgot that he totally wasn’t going to call Tolio by his made-up pet name.

It revealed too many of the confusing can of worms in his breast.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#12
 Tolio.</style>



It is hard to trust Zikar-Sin with this information, but he also feels a desperate desire to have the stallion believe him. Tolio could easily be tortured, killed, exiled for the words he had just spoken. Yet the deeper, darker part of him is screaming in rage. It is a child of Psyche, a creature born by anger and injustice. It tears its way out of his ribcage and up around his throat, screeching at him to let it free. It will not allow this injustice against its Lady. Tolio whimpers pitifully and clenched his eyes shut. It is so painful trying to decide between the sides of himself. Zikar-Sin momentarily fades away and he’s twitching slightly, fighting against it, but he knows he cannot win. He doesn’t succumb, but he is forced to speak. ”Don’t get me wrong…Psyche is a wonderful Lady. I am not disloyal to the Basin. I would fight for her if she so much as commanded me, do you understand?” Desperation laces his visage as he turns to Zikar-Sin. Conflicting emotions swirl in his orbs, fighting each other. ”It is like a parent being with you for your entire life, and then someone else steps in to replace them, calling themselves by the same name. It’s…it’s hard for me, Sinny…” voice breaking softly, honesty coating every tone. ”Psyche…she took me in and helped me when I was at my lowest. I support her, but I still am too loyal to Mauja. What do I do? How can I give up hope on my King? That would be the worst thing I could ever do. Yet…Psyche was the one who saved his group, who saved me. It’s…conflicting,” he managed to whimper out, feeling pathetic and weak. He had torn loyalties, it was true, but he was also bonded far stronger to Mauja than Psyche.

Tolio sucked in a breath weakly, composing himself. Blinking up at Zikar-Sin when his name was stuttered, and the look on his face nearly crushed his heart. He didn’t understand the emotion on his face and yet felt as if he had done something terribly wrong and had hurt the adorable fumbling brute in some way. Face fell momentarily, thinking he had done something wrong that he didn’t understand. At last he spoke and Tolio felt his face and chest warm at the affectionate nickname. Was it affectionate? Tolio secretly hoped so, and chided himself for thinking that. ”He is. But…maybe he’s not an ‘is’ anymore…maybe I should move on, fully support our Empress…it won’t be a massive change, she is still my Lady even if Mauja will always be my King.” Sighing and resigning himself to that. Secretly he still hoped that the icy king would return, but was starting to doubt himself. Snow was thinning yet air never stopped moving into colder temperatures. Tolio peered through the thinning snow and found himself blinking stupidly. Was that the ocean?! He turned to look at Zikar-Sin with wide, surprised eyes. ”Can we…can we not talk about this? It makes me feel conflicted.” Eyes and face working together to beg him to leave the topic they were on. Nudging his shoulder very gently against the darker expanse of Zikar-Sin’s, trotting ahead on lanky legs towards the glittering ocean that looked far different in comparison to the one that stretched around the beach in the south he visited so often. Eager to explore he turned his head towards the other stallion, smiling and giggling excitedly. ”Come on Sinny! Doesn’t it look interesting?” Secretly storing away the ‘Lio’ he’d let slip out, despite the dejected tone he’d said it in. Nobody had called him that before. Silver irises beckoned him, returning to his happy self as he encouraged the other into exploring this new stretch of sea water that so entranced him.




Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#13





*”Can we…can we not talk about this? It makes me feel conflicted.”*

The words washed over Sin, and he took a deep breath—before letting it fall from his lips in silent chuckles. Once it broke his lips, it didn’t stop; as the snickering left the depths of his throat, it began to grow into something larger and heartier—as a snowball might fall from the snow-capped mountain side and grow as it rolls to the foothills below, so did Sin’s laughter grow into great, side- shaking warbles of airy, genuine amusement. Sin had never laughed like that—or if he did, he had no memory of it. The weight of it was almost painful on his sides, and he could feel the prickling of tears at the sides of his eyes. And yet the sensation he felt wasn’t one of discomfort, but one of release; Sin felt as though he were walking standing on air, on top of the world and, for the moment, king of its realm. The reason was simple: What Tolio described was precisely was Sin was feeling. It was as though the chestnut stallion was begging to leave off this topic for Sin’s sake. His words on both the Dark Empress and the Ice King, the sincerity he spoke with when he said he was servant to them both—it was all so confusing, and too much for Sin to contemplate. He would think of them later, surely, but it would be a long and arduous process to contemplate-- with a jolt, Sin realized that Tolio must be in the same situation, if not that much more confusing. Sin….for once in his life, Sin understood how someone else was feeling, and the reverse was true as well. It was such a beautiful feeling bubbling up inside him, like seltzer water or tiny, bottle stars begging for release. Sin laughed because he was finally assured that he wasn’t insane.

He laughed because he didn’t feel so alone.

*”Come on Sinny! Doesn’t it look interesting?”*

Sin registered the subtle touch on his shoulder as the laughter died in his lips, thought mirth still bubbled up inside him and continued to boil as Tolio succumbed to fits of his famous giggling. The feeling was infectious; following Tolio, the dappled stallion stepped upon the beach and looked out upon the sparkling waters of the northern sea. Sin’s eyes widened as he surveyed the expanse; he had seen oceans before, sure, but he never once thought that so much water could exist so far north. Wouldn’t it freeze? Was there some sort of chemical in the make-up of the water that kept it from freezing? Or, perhaps, the water was kept at an elevated temperature at all times? And if that were true, how was it kept at a sustained temperature? Sin’s mind buzzed with these and a thousand more questions, the contemplation of science combining with Tolio’s contagious happiness and giggling placing Sin firmly within his happy place.

Hmmm…I wonder. The salt was evident in the air, and it was an ocean after all, so Sin was aware that this water was salty. But he wanted to test his hypothesis that there was a chemical keeping the ocean from freezing. He reached out with his mouth, intending to taste the liquid—but then he realized that this mystery substance might prove to be fatal if ingested. Drat. He would have to think of something else; perhaps he could test his other hypothesis that stipulated it was the waters temperature that kept it from freezing? He reached out his lips again, intending to only feel the water’s temperature-- but another idea came to mind. A wry, reckless, rash idea that was no-doubt born of the bliss from his forced ignorance.

Sin suddenly leapt forward, crashing into the water with his cloven feet. Almost immediately, Sin realized that this was an awful idea; the water singed and burned him, lashing at him wherever it touched, though Sin knew this burning was associated with the ass-cold property of the water. It certainly wasn’t temperature keeping it from freezing—but by all accounts the water should have been frozen already. Weird. Sin didn’t contemplate it for long, however; he quickly leapt out of the water back onto the frozen beach, splashing icy liquid as he went. He hadn’t exactly thought this through; he was still in the middle of the Frozen Steppe, snow lying about and a healthy wind-chill settled in the area. And now his legs, sides, chest, beard, and tail were sopping wet, only adding to the abysmally cold sensation.

Sin looked up at Tolio, then back at the ground; if he had enough body-heat left, his ear s would have blushed. He was suddenly shy—but it wasn’t because he had just flopped into the water. It was the effect Tolio had on him. “It….It’s cold,” he said somewhat stupidly; he chuckled at his own dullness.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com





Tolio Posts: 110
Deceased
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 17.3hh :: 6 Years 8 Months Buff: NOVICE
Brit
#14
 Tolio.</style>



At first, Tolio fears that Zikar-Sin is upset with him, for he is silent and still for a moment.

It is far more surprising when a rumbling laughter comes spilling forth from his lips, as if he was laughing for the entirety of his life. It encompasses him, dragging him into the exhilaration the other stallion is experiencing. His laugh is large, as if it is trying to stretch over the entirety of the steppe. Warm, bubbling. It makes Tolio suddenly very flustered, as if that laugh had slowly but surely drawn the air from his lungs. He is unable to breathe, and yet he feels warmer than he ever has being in the wintery landscape. It makes him want to laugh as well, but all he can do is sit and stare at Zikar-Sin in wonder. When he laughs, his entire face has a warmth that doesn’t come from shyness. No, it is like he is suddenly aware of how he fits his skin, and it’s so incredibly handsome that Tolio feels his face beginning to burn with embarrassment. At first he had only thought of Zikar-Sin as adorable, with how he fumbled and didn’t seem to understand social norms. Now…now he is very, very aware of the stallion’s attractiveness, and feels almost ashamed. He feels like he is defiling Zikar-Sin, as if he is some kind of pervert, which just makes his face burn brighter. Zikar-Sin is so sweet, surely he cannot reciprocate the small flutters of anxiety and nerves that appear when he hears that booming laugh.

Stop it Tolio, haven’t you hurt yourself enough?

He latches onto a distraction wholeheartedly, dragging Zikar-Sin into the topic as well. He cannot linger on such thoughts. The coal stallion followed without complaint, though Tolio felt a little guilty that the laughter did not continue. Together they gazed out across the beach, Tolio a bit more apprehensive than Zikar-Sin. He enjoyed the beach of the Endless Blue, but this ocean looked as if carved from glowing blue ice. It screamed at him that it was dangerous, and yet even he was curious. The wind was cold as it whipped off the water, slicing neatly into his skin as if he did not have one for protection. Zikar-Sin moved closer, head dipping, and a strangled worried noise slipped from the feminine stallion’s throat. ”S-Sinny I don’t think you should-“ but his words are cut short for the man is leaping forward into the water with a loud splash. Tolio made a high-pitched whine, as if he had meant to scream and it got stuck. Already wide doe eyes only made themselves larger as he stared in shock and horror at the other male. Good Gods it had to be freezing! Luckily as he started running towards the other male in a panic he jumped back out. How the hell he got so wet in such a short amount of time was beyond Tolio, but his eyes focused on the sheepish almost apologetic look on his face.

Heart nearly had a seizure of worry and he circled Zikar-Sin, making noises of distress, face crumpled. Distraught tears are working their way into his eyes and as he brushes his muzzle to Zikar-Sin’s chest he recoils at the cold temperature. ”Of course it’s cold!” He means to scold him, but it is weak with fear. Zikar-Sin had just given him the shock of his life, and he’s feeling a little unsteady. The bit is completely gone from his words, and instead he presses very close to him, head to tail, and drapes his neck over the other stallion. Pressing as near as he can get, sharing his body heat with him. It is nearly excruciating to feel the cold against his own skin, but he stays put. Slowly he feels the cold subside as his own warmth battles it, and lets out a scared shaky breath against Zikar-Sin’s flank, giggle coming out a little hysterical. ”D-Don’t ever scare me like that again!” Finally shoving the fear down and conquering it, idly grooming Zikar-Sin while they stood together. It made his heart jump in staccato beats to be so close to him, but he is also far too concerned about his health to enjoy it fully. ”Are you warming up? Should we move? Should we go to the hot springs?” And again worry is caught in his tone, weaved up inside of it intimately. He’s scared that Zikar-Sin will freeze, or that he’s not doing something right, and his mother-hen voice is coming into play, affection and worry battling it out in his every word.




Zikar-Sin Posts: 78
Hidden Account
Stallion :: Unicorn :: 16hh :: 8
M.E.
#15





At first, the whole situation was comical; Sin’s nerves were completely shot, numb as they were from the freezing cold starting to seep within his undercoat, and so he couldn’t actually feel his body as it shook violently against the bitter breeze. Tolio’s voice had acquired that charming quality he loved about it; the high-pitched, almost squeal of shout as the chestnut stallion waxed eloquent his concern for Sin. The infectious laughter that Sin had been a victim of not too long ago still infected his throat, beguiling tiny chuckles to slip out and transform into seemingly benign clouds of vapor that escaped into his beard. Deep down, somewhere, he knew this wasn’t particularly healthy; but he couldn’t stop his laughter and the amusement he felt at the absurdity of the situation. It was all so stupid! And yet refreshing in its own right, listening to Tolio’s melodic, panicked cooing and pretending as though everything was A-Okay.

But then Tolio came closer to Sin, and although his nerves hadn’t melted yet and he still couldn’t feel much, there was a peculiar sensation crawling up his spine as Tolio draped his neck across the dappled back. It wasn’t unlike the eerie chill he had felt not too long ago—the chill that had warranted the mention of the Ice King—but Sin didn’t want to think too much about that instant. It was still so confusing and unpleasant, even in retrospect, yet this feeling was different. It was as though the pit and heart of Sin’s chest had begun a slow-moving decent somewhere towards his knees, and while it was scary and unfamiliar, it wasn’t entirely disagreeable. All at once, Sin was reminded just how much he really enjoyed the stallion’s company, and was struck by his proximity. Not that he was conscious of personal bubbles and boundaries, it’s just…no one…never really gave any indication of the desire to approach Sin, to touch him, attempt to fend off the chill and warm the dappled-boy’s bones. It was working too; little by little, Sin’s body began to melt underneath Tolio’s fuss and heat, until Sin was unexpectedly slammed with cold.

Sin let his head and neck fall against Tolio’s back, clinging to the chestnut’s warmth, because holy crap it was cold. He became aware of how violently his joints and his bones were shaking, and how every breath quivered and seared the back of his throat with frost. It really was a bad idea, now that the full repercussions of the action finally hit him—but Sin didn’t regret the decision, whatever came to pass. He knew now that the northern seas were much colder than nature should allow, and so, one day, he would return and test the waters to try to determine how they could escape the proper fate of cold water.

In the meantime, it truly was too damn cold out here.

*”Are you warming up? Should we move? Should we go to the hot springs?”*

The idea was sound and logical, and Sin didn’t want any of it. Though his breath was shallow with the roots of desperation and his jerky knees were truthfully starting to worry him, Sin didn’t want to move from this spot. For one thing, the notion of movement through the icy snowdrifts while every shiver sent tendrils of tingly cold though his sinews wasn’t a very attractive thought. For another, he liked where he was at the moment; his head resting fully on Tolio’s back, breathing in his chestnuty scent and entrusting the stud with his whole cold being. It was an intoxicating experience; somewhere along the line, Sin had found something within Tolio, whether it was when he was comforting the stallion from his obvious ache or sharing in the painful confusion concerning the Ice King. Or maybe it was right at this moment in time, when they were sharing each other’s warmth, where Sin felt that spark of a connection, that tiny promise of comradeship and something more. Something earnest.

“Th-th-the sp-springs s-s-s-s-sound g-good,” Sin said with comically jittery teeth; he clamped his mouth shut quickly, not wanting Tolio to worry his head over him so much. The only movement he made, however, was to bury his head closer into Tolio’s hide, unwilling to let him go so easily. Perhaps it was because of that tiny spark of a connection he had felt; there might have been a small fear in Sin’s mind, a worry that if he left Tolio’s side, that spark would extinguish and he would be left all alone in his insanity and the cruel humor of the world and its fate.

Or maybe he was just too cold, and Tolio was so warm.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IMG Credit: ness094@deviantart.com






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