Phae found it fitting that her companion bore the same white wings as the mare who had enabled her quest in the first place. Without Sohalia's kindness and willingness to trust her heart to a mare she scarcely knew, Stella would not be an actuality. More and more Phae found herself wondering about Sohalia, about Sohalia and Note specifically. They seemed to have gotten off on the right foot when last Phae saw them, a few weeks ago. But after Note's initial impression on her, she was concerned. He seemed....guarded. Jaded maybe, she didn't know. She also didn't know why she cared. Is this truly what friendship felt like? Phae did not have friends, boyfriends maybe, but never slumber party, braid each other's hair and gossip friends. Then again, Sohalia didn't seem like a gossiper...Frowning, Phae considered whether or not she actually could forge a friendship with someone, if she didn't even know what the term really entailed.

The wind felt reassuring and comforting beneath her wings, as she glided in the direction of the Throat. She wasn't feeling 100%, although Tor had healed her wings, and the gash on her leg from her spar with Aisha was healing nicely as well. The cause of her discomfort was not something she believed could be remedied by a healer, then again 'remedied' was probably entirely the wrong way to even categorize it. Looking uncertainly to Stella, Phae sighed. I hope Sohalia and I are friends. It would be good to talk about this... She mentally projected. Stella, still annoyed with her bonded over the events of a few days ago, said and projected nothing.

Nearing the Throat, Phae slowed down considerably, landing with each on the dry blood-stained terrain. Being a spy, it always interested her to visit the herd lands, just to see what was going on. And if anyone asked, well, she was just here looking for her friend. Maybe a friendship would be advantageous? Phae thought, but quickly dismissed the idea. Something inside her told her that friendships ought not to be built on false pretences. Phae was find with having fake friendships, if they suited her purpose, but in her heart she knew that she needed the bond between her and Sohalia to be real, if she was going to tell her secret. Picking up a light trot, Phae moved deeper into the Throat, hoping to catch a glimpse of the white mare against the red rock.

There was a time that Phae would have felt an anxious panic at being surrounded by so many pegasi. For all her life, Phae had been a flighty creature. She had flirted with men only to win their affections, so that they might protect as one would some shiny gem, or other precious item. Her only defense was to flee - and her abilities in that arena were almost unmatched. She was built for speed, and her life had relied on her God's given abilities more than once. But now?When had she changed? She felt no fear here, only a cool confidence. That must be the Grey's influence on her, surely. Even saying that she was a part of a mercenary group made her feel confident and untouchable. Or perhaps it was the spar she had recently won? Or, perhaps it was Stella...Her life had real purpose - a band, for they weren't quite a herd, and were too cold and distant to be considered a family, and a companion, to look after. She no longer needed to flirt with men for protection, but found that she still liked to do so.

As she moved, a stark figured moved out in the sands before her. While Phae presumed the Throat had many white pegasi amongst them, she recognized Sohalia for who she was, almost instantly. It was almost like looking in a mirror, really. They had similar body structures and were of a similar height.Had Phae been born with one more cream gene, they could nearly have been twins. An excited apprehension grasped Phae as the two neared. This was not like flirting at all...Phae did not know how to act around a mare, not really. I was just thinking about you! Frowning, Phae tilted her head inquisitively, coming to a halt before Sohalia. That was almost precisely what Levi had said, when she had come looking for him as well. "Oh?" She inquired uncertainly, hoping Sohalia's thoughts of her wouldn't end as dramatically as Levi's had.

High above, Stella circled. She was clearly still upset with Phae about being shushed and told to leave that evening in the Grove. But what took place there, was no place for a chick. No place for anyone except for her and Tolio....Still, Stella did not appreciate Phae's need for privacy, nor the fact that she had mentally barred her companion from searching her mind to see what had happened. Stella would not stray from her companion, but nor would she come down and be polite either. She was full of childish arrogance and entitlement, traits that Phae did not appreciate. Better get used to it... her mind warned her condescendingly.

Phae felt the blood drain out of her face, and had to focus steadily to keep her knees from trembling. She needed advice..to talk...maybe just to tell someone! From high above, Stella her tongue angrily, implying that Phae could talk to her, and not this other mare. Shaking her head, the sooty mare sent reassuring thoughts towards the bird, who sent nothing in return. "Uhm.." Phae began tentativley, "Is there somewhere we can talk? I..." But she couldn't finish. All she managed was a helpless look towards the white mare, hoping in some way she would understand.

...an ear to a friend. The magic word, friend.

It had been presumptuous of Phae to assume that they were friends, but perhaps she was not as misguided as she had originally believed. Or perhaps Sohalia was merely a friend and an ear to all who needed it? Still, the sooty mare was in no position to be choosy - there was literally no other that she could call upon. Levi, Apollo, Tolio, were all no's. Ktulu, Ophelia, Tor? Maybe Tor...But she hadn't seen the healer around. No, Sohalia was quite simply all she had.

As Sohalia indicated the way in which they ought to go, and began to move, Phae noticed her bi-coloured gaze land upon Stella for a moment. You ass. Phae thought harshly, mentally chastising herself. She hadn't even said hello, hadn't even asked about Note; some friend I am. Forcing her self to smile at the observance of her anxiety, she tossed her head as if it was nothing. "Do I? I don't mean to." Looking towards the sky at the sulking chick, Phae smiled adoringly. "That little ball of sass up there is Stella. Which reminds me...How are you and Note?" Genuine sincerity crept into her voice, as she inquired about the fair mare's wellbeing.

She would gladly break the neutral-position of The Grey and the Throat to teach Note a lesson, if he needed one. She felt instinctively the desire to protect Sohalia or perhaps it was simply the desire to ensure that she had not made a mistake, by introducing the two. Part of her felt responsible now for Sohalia's love life - a laughable concept given her current situation. But even still, she wished to see no harm, or heartbreak befall the stunning white pegasus. As she waited for a response, she felt her body bristle slightly, as she remembered her first meeting with Note. Had he simply struck her the wrong way? Or was there more to it..?

Feeling Phae's bubbling anger, Stella chirped uncertainly from the skies, letting her small body fall from the air. She neatly extended her wings halting her descent a few inches above Phae's back, landing neatly on her wither. The small black and white chick peered out from behind Phae's sandy cream mane at the dazzling white pegasus. Her bright orangey-yellow face was white with interest. From Phae's mind, she understood that this mare was the reason they were together. During her time with the God of the Earth, she understood that her soon-to-be-bonded was on a quest. It was only now that Stella could put a face to that concept. As much as she wanted to go to the white mare, Stella stayed still and silent on Phae's back. She couldn't pinpoint in what direction her bonded's emotions were directed, and didn't want to instigate anything.

Phae felt her protective surge begin to wane as Sohalia spoke adoringly of Note. She heard the pride in her voice as she spoke, and idly Phae wondered what that was like. She had some idea, of course. She had the Grey, Stella...Tolio? her mind suggested. But no, that wasn't quite right. It was as if Phae had pieces of a life that Sohalia was living in full. Would she trade what she had, to be in the white mare's place? She wasn't so sure...Given the drama with Levi that day in the Fields, and again here in the Throat, she wasn't sure if she could handle being tied down.

Phae smiled awkwardly as Sohalia's eyes met hers, in thanks. Typically her looks were full of mischief, or were cast flirtatiously. In all honesty, she didn't quite know how to react to such a genuine stare. Blinking, she fumbled for words, but found none. Breaking their eye contact, she shook her head, trying to rid herself of this feeling of awkwardness. "It isn't like I didn't get anything out of it" She quipped, trying to play down Sohalia's obvious sincerity. Phae sighed with relief as Sohalia directed her attention to the bird, hiding on her back. Sensing Phae's anger had dissipated, Stella trilled happily at Sohalia's comment. She turned her beak upwards, demonstrated the feathers which had begun to protrude from the back of her head, characteristic of her species. Apparently the little bird had inherited her bonded's flirtious and showy nature. Pleased to have been recognized, Stella curled up on Phae's wither, surrounding herself in a tangle of mane.

But you wanted to talk? Phae looked around, grateful that Sohalia had picked up on her implied desire for psudo-secrecy on this matter. She flicked her tail, rolling the thoughts around her mind, as if trying to get a feel for how she wanted to proceed. "I..." But she couldn't go on. Swallowing hard, she could feel a heated blush return to her cheeks, as the events of her night with Tolio unfolded in her mind. Words could simply not explain her feelings towards the situation - they simply weren't enough. Perhaps, it was that Phae herself didn't understand what she felt fully enough to explain. Regardless, there was one concrete piece of information that she did know. Meeting Sohalia's bi-coloured gaze, she took a deep breath. "I think I'm pregnant" She admitted, her voice low and unsure. Quickly, she glanced around, to ensure that no one was around to hear. Satisfied that they were still alone, she focused on the white mare once again, her eyes full of worry and uncertainty.

[OOC: Silly work. Preventing me from posting. How RUDE. :)]

Should she have mentioned it at all? Even as the words left her mouth she was uncertain as to what resolution she was hoping for. Did she want comfort? Advice? Slowly she realized that if Sohalia and Levi were in the same herd...perhaps the mare's alliences would be stronger to her herd-mate, than to a tentative friend? Would Sohalia tell Levi of her transgressions? And then what? Levi would be...well. Actually, what would he be? There was still so much unresolved between the two - his behavior in the fields with Pluto, and then again in the Throat. His behaviour had become more and more erratic around her, to the point where he was so anxious to impress her, that he actually ended up wounding her with his magic. And for what? Did he not see her for what she truly was? He had hinted at wanting to speak with her, and it would not be the first time a stallion had prefaced a moonlight conversation with her that way. Did he love her? Was that it? Phae thought it likely - but evenmoreso, she thought he simply believed he loved her. He didn't even know her at all. You don't know Tolio at all.. a small voice in the back of her mind reminded her. And that was true as well. Could Levi love her the instantaneous way she had loved the cinnamon stallion?

What a mess.

Phae listened as Sohalia stuttered through a clearly-surprised congratulation. Were congratulations in order? She wasn't so sure. "..who the father is?" She heard Sohalia ask. At this, she couldn't help the smile that parted her lips. Tolio...my love. Only, after that night, she found that she was no longer in love with him; though she did love him completely. It was as if the physicality of their night together in the Grove drained all lust from their bodies, leaving only an airy adoration, and unbreakable bond. "His name is Tolio, a stallion of the Basin. He is...well, gay." She admitted, a small laugh escaping her. It really did sound amusing out loud. "He was my bestfriend and then...then we got into an argument. A fight, really, after Leander injured me. It was all because of a mare called Faelene. We didn't see each other for weeks and then when we did..." She paused, exhaling as she remembered. How they had fought. There was a time during those harsh exchanges that Phae thought they were over and done with for good. "But...then something changed between us. Blossomed, and..." She shrugged helplessly, unable to vocalize it. They had gone from screaming at each other to embracing and then finally....

Again her gaze met Sohalia's with confusion and uncertainty. She had never wanted a foal...this was not...not her, not the life she wanted. But she would not regret the night spent with Tolio. It had changed something deep within her; shown her the truest form of herself, and allowed her to share that with him. And only him...

"We aren't...together" She clarified, wincing slightly as she said so. What would Sohalia think of her? It wasn't as if they just had a one night stand...but then again, that was precisely what it was. But it...it was more complicated than that. As Sohalia mentions the Grey, a new wave of anxiety washes over the sooty mare. The Grey! She hadn't even considered that - nor had she considered the racist home that her foal's father lived in. How would the Grey handle her pregnancy? Would she be cast out? If so, where would she go? It wasn't as though she could stay with Tolio, and from their previous conversations, she wasn't so sure he would leave the Basin, given his former allegiance to Mauja. "I....never even thought about it"

Her head dipped low with guilt from the weight of the situation. What would she do? And how would she tell Tolio? What would he think...? Obviously there was a chance that Phae would get pregnant but...well, in all honesty, since she had never been pregnant before, she simply assumed that given the amount of...er...indisgressions she had had in the past, that she simply wasn't fertile. And that was okay with her. "Tolio...he doesn't know. No one does. You're the first." Looking up, she again forced a smile, but an obvious one this time. The situation was a mess, and she knew it.

Hey...It's going to be okay As Phae felt Sohalia's soft muzzle grace her shoulder, everything suddenly became real. I'm pregnant. With Tolio's foal.

Her passion for him had swelled until she could stand it no longer. She had gone to him then, that night in the Grove, feeling absolutely no resistance on his part. Her love for him burned hot and bright, but as he satisfied her need to him, it seemed to quell the flame as well. It still burned within her, but in a much different way. A softer way. She adored the cinnamon stallion, and would always love him. But as the morning's light fell upon them, the realization that they were not meant to stay as lovers was obvious. But now that she was pregnant, the emotional bond between them was further strengthened by this physical connection; the life growing inside of her.

The idea of having created something that was part of both of them, was a beautiful thing. But thinking of it as a foal, was different. Thinking of it as something to be cared and natured for - to endure its adolescence and drama...That was something she wasn't entirely excited about. Phae...do you want a foal? Thinking on this for a moment, Phae realized how truly selfish their act had been. Would they make good parents? Certainly Tolio would but...her? She was no mother - no nurturer or teacher. But nor could she stand the idea of giving up, or doing wrong by something that they created. She shook her head sadly for a moment, looking hopeless and lost. "I never wanted one before, no. But now? Well, it isn't as though there's anything I can do about it."

Phae glanced around, half expecting Levi to show up at any minute. He had a knack for running into her at all ends of Helovia, and this was his herd land, after all. Seeing no one nearing the border, she sighed thankfully. Maybe she could simply hide away, deep in the Deep Forest? She would much rather be suddenly spotted with a foal, than to have others see her with her belly swollen and round. But there was still the question of The Grey. She had worked so hard to try and earn Ktulu's respect...stealing an amulet, sparring, proving her worth as a spy. Phae, not knowing that Ktu herself had offspring of her own, assumed the dark mare would frown on her behaviour, and cast her out.

it seemed like there was something between you and Levi, once

Oh Levi… She thought with a small and sad smile. He had been talking with Sohalia of her? They were in the same herd after all…Or was Sohalia simply this inquisitive all the time? So many unknowns about her new friend, and yet here she was, telling this mare her darkest secrets. Why stop now? "He's been…strange towards me lately." She began, with a frown. "When we first met, it was all fun in games. He seemed enamoured by me as-" Phae noted the way she spoke with a certain amount of pride, as she began to describe how Levi had become enamoured by her, as most men did. Shamefully, she cleared her throat and continued on, her voice much more even and boast-less. "Uhm. I mean, I think he developed a crush on me. I didn't mean to lead him on - I thought he understand that it was all in good fun…He seemed to.." Again her voice trailed off as she looked at Sohalia. So pure. With her herd, and her Note…How could Phae ever explain her flirtatious nature to such a mare?Still, it wasn't as if Sohalia was blind to her actions? Again, swallowing hard, she forcer herself to continue. "..to understand that my intentions, while…flirtatious, were platonic. But…he did grow on me.." She said, smiling fondly. "And then…then we ran into each other, in the fields, and encountered another mare. Levi did something…he…awoke something inside of me, something that desired to know him better. Had this other mare not been around, I would have openly shared my feelings, and do you know what he did?" She asked with an incredulous and bitter laugh. "I knew full well that he had feelings for me - or was beginning to, and that weasel practically threw himself at another mare, right in front of me." Her words were short, and edgy now. "In the long run, I suppose i'm glad it happened. Maybe I read him wrong, and I never interested him anyways. But if I did, the fact that he would touch another mare the way he did, especially with me standing right there?" She shook her head, her nostrils flaring. "Unacceptable.

Her tail snapped with agitation as she remembered that day. She was sure that Levi only meant to make her jealous, and possibly fight for his attention…she was sure that while things were light, he enjoyed having Phae flirt-fight another mare for him. But using her emotions like that? So carelessly?With a small laugh, she raised her eyes to Sohalia's. "Perhaps that is more than your question was asking..There might have been something there once. And i'm sure if and when he finds out that i'm with foal, he'll think he lost me to another stallion. But it was all him, and his arrogance and his games. Besides, he doesn't even know me Sohalia. Sure we run into each other often but…what does that add up to?"

"Hide? In the woods maybe?" Phae replied with a laugh, though there was a certain seriousness there as well. Could she simple hide away? Disappear? It would certainly make things easier. Less questions, perhaps. But of course, there was the question of Tolio. "I suppose I'll tell Tolio and see….see what he thinks? I don't even know what he'll say about all of this."

Phae considered Sohalia's offer to assist her with a solemn appreciation. From the beginning the white mare had been nothing by welcoming and trusting, first with Phae's quest, then with meeting Note. Note… Narrowing her eyes, she looked at Sohalia mischievously. "…You and Note weren't planning on have any foals anytime soon…were you?" She asked hopefully. Hey, if Sohalia could ask about her past with Levi, surely her current love wasn't off the table? And foals? Given their current conversation wasn't a stretch. Then again, what did Phae know of the boundaries and limitations of friendship? This was all just as new to her as pregnancy was. Although suddenly, as she found herself in the midst of both, maybe it wasn't too bad? Mares had foals all the time…It wasn't as if anything drastic would have to change, she'd simply to have reel herself in for a time, that's all. And if she had someone to share the pregnancy with, well, that might make it even better. Of course she wouldn't say that aloud. Even though Sohalia had offered to aid the sooty mare in whatever way she could, bringing a life into the world simply to ease Phae's pregnancy was not something even one as manipulative as Phae, would ask for. At least not in those words.

[ooc: Replying in the reverse order to what Soh said]

Noticing Sohalia's innocent uncomfortableness and the blush which coloured her cheeks at the mention of being with Note, Phae couldn't help but smile. She had been with many stallions during her time pre-Helovia, but never had it been like it was with Tolio...She had felt much like Sohalia would feel her first time - excited, nervous, beautiful...Reiterating the gesture that Phae had learned from the snowy mare, she extended her muzzle, softly brushing the side of Soh's shoulder. "The time will come, when the time comes." She said softly, no longer pressing or even hinting that Soh should have a foal with her.

Phae laughed and tossed her head at the thought of Sohalia and herself boldly marching into the Basin to find Tolio. What trouble that would cause for everyone - Surely Tolio would be thrown out, if ever it came to light that he had non-unicorn offspring, and a fight might break out between the Throat and the Basin due to Sohalia's part in it but....Oh Gods..! Phae thought with a sudden wave of panic. She had never even considered how the foal might actually turn out! Eyes widening in alarm she looked to Sohalia, a glowing uncertainty in her eyes.

"The foal! If I'm a pegasus and he's a unicorn...what will the foal be?" Surely Sohalia could see the problem that she was facing? If it was a pegasus, like her, Tolio would almost certainly be forced to leave the Basin...or worse, perhaps. Would he be branded as a traitor? Would their child pay the price for their choices? It seemed there was no winning...If the child was a Unicorn, that would be optimal for Tolio - it could even live in the Basin with him, its lineage unknown, using the Basin for safety until it was older. But if it was a Unicorn....It will never know the skies... She thought sadly. A pegasus child on the other hand, would be forced to live with her, she supposed. In the Grey. With a sigh, she realized that she ought to find Ktu or Ophelia as soon as possible. If she needed to find a new affiliation, she would rather do so before her belly had fully filled with life.