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QIAN Vs EDGE INVASION :: EDGE Rubrics

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Official
#7




A u r e l i u s

AURELIUS -- Round 2

[Realism]
+ 1| ATTACK: ramming Lace's leg as he's rearing.
- 1| Charging forward after: you should always allow your opponent full ability to defend themselves, and unfortunately that means not retreating before they can respond to your actions.
-2| ATTACK: ramming at Azzuen. You have much in this post which forces Azzuen to take the attack you have dealt at him, making it pretty strong powerplay. The recoil should come in your next post, if and when Azzuen describes the ram hitting his hock.

[Prose]
+ 1| Easy Read
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow

AURELIUS -- Round 3

[Realism]
+ 1| DEFENSE: Taking Kali's claws to his neck.
+ 1| DEFENSE: avoiding Kali's second dive and biting at her.
+ 1| DEFENSE: Allowing Azzuen's hooves to hit to the right of his spine, essentially pushing him over to minimize damage.
0 | I'm not going to count off for this because it does not effect the fight, but I wanted you to note that losing a sense does not make the others stronger. They are the same, though you may begin to realize just how much you rely on them without thinking! :)
- 1| ATTACK: ramming at Torasin's leg. I'm counting off on this for redundancy.
+ 1| ATTACK: Blind-bucking as a form of defense.

[Prose]
+ 1| Easy Read
+ 1| Emotion: being very frightened by suddenly being blinded.
0 | Flow: the beginning had some unnecessary ramble away from the action. This did not hurt/help it, but disrupted the general flow.

AURELIUS -- Round 4

[Realism]
+ 1| DEFENSE: taking Fajira's burn to his side.
+ 1| DEFENSE: taking Azzuen's magic as a massive migraine. I loved the way you described this, actually. It was very realistic and I could get a feel on how disorientated he was.
+ 1| DEFENSE: Taking the cut to the shoulder.
+ 1| ATTACK: Biting at Leander's thigh.

[Prose]
- 1| Easy Read: I was confused by the sudden burn. You should state very clearly that Fajira's fire is burning his side because it was not overtly obvious.
+ 1| Emotion: World is spinning!
+ 1| Flow

AURELIUS -- Round 5 (defense only)

[Realism]
Nothing to defend.

[Prose]
+ 1| Easy Read
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow


AURELIUS

[Bonus]
+ 1| Kept in mind injuries throughout the invasion, headache from headbutts, muscle pain, etc.

[Injuries]
- 1| Severe burn to the rump.

[Creativity]
Nothing of note.

Comments: Aurelius handled himself well in the fight. You had some problems with redundancy of your attacks, and at times using commanding language. Overall, you did great!

TOTAL
Aurelius - 14





Messages In This Thread
RE: QIAN Vs EDGE INVASION :: EDGE Rubrics - by Official - 10-05-2012, 01:44 PM

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