I think I have changed.
There is a rhythm - a pulsing vertigo in my life that consumes my every breath. But it isn't so painful as it once was. My family is ... different now. Ivezho has returned, and yet he hasn't filled the void in my life that I surely thought he would. Life hasn't collapsed back into what was good and whole and right. It is merely another sort of different. Yet I am okay with it. My heart is still weary, heavy, and broken, but I am okay.
When was the last time I thought that?
I feel myself smiling - and it feels quite foreign - but I allow it. I move easily across the sands. My gaze doesn't quite connect with anything in the landscape; I am moving, but I am not looking. I just am, without thought or consequence.
I am Rhoa, and I am just going for a walk.
The warm air billows around me, cradling me in its heat and sweaty embrace. I allow that too - for these winds supporting me from my earliest days. They are like an old friend, a memory that is still so vivid. I inhale deeply, and the salty tang in the air widens my smile.
Yes. This is home.
I am glad that I am back.
My gaze sweeps right, and there, nestled like a piece of art into the landscape is Spice. Immediatel my hooves remember the feeling of running across the sands to the Endless Blue - so that Spice could swim for the first time. I remember bringing her back here, and welcoming her to my Father and into the Throat.
I remember everything, and it lightens my heart.
I don't call out to her, but I do move her direction. I have grown - I am fully a stallion now, all muscle and tight lines. I am not quite as wide and tough as my Father, Sohalia's lines have tempered his bulk nicely. My eyes focus upon her, and yet I am still silent.
What need is there to shout?
rhoa
these seconds when i'm shaking leave me shuddering for days
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