the Rift


A Runner?

Tamira Posts: 60
Deceased
Mare :: Equine :: 15.2 hh :: 6 (ages in Orangemoon)
RayoDeSoleil
#11
"You need no governing.
You are already ruled."
Mandrake brainwashed him and controls him.
Pass.

"Your ruler is off.
Ruler needs time."
Mandrake is offline. I was also pointing towards him relationship with her.
Fail. Whether or not the account is on- or offline doesn't really have anything to do with anything. Also, at any given time when someone is reading, Mandrake may come online; and no one would know if she was on or offline at the time the stealth was written. Also, I don't think this is a clear reference to their relationship.

"A wrangler does so, but to you he wants.
Rope you down and cage you up.
Caged? No, I broke the lock..
Hell yes you are now free.
I understand you know, but was it unnecessary to just run away...
"Boy, just get your ass over here." Muttered aloud.
All I need is a word with you, dark mangled boy.
Ladies, here the runner is.
"Dude! He don't look like one to me!" The stupid rolled and chanted."
The first letter of each line combined spells Archibald.
Pass.

""Boy, just get your ass over here." Muttered aloud.
All I need is a word with you, dark mangled boy."
He is black which is a dark color. He is a stallion which is a boy.
Fail. Ultimately, these clues in conjunction with another might have been good, but they are far too broad. There are many dark-colored stallions in Helovia. Archi, Deimos, d'Art, to name just a few. Perhaps a reference to the Foothills might have made this better.

"Ladies, here the runner is.
"Dude! He don't look like one to me!" The stupid rolled and chanted.""
Archibald is a draft horse and drafts aren't built to be runners.
Fail. While it's true that drafts aren't built to be runners, all horses DO run - if this had been a personality reference, as Archi is more likely to confront than run, it would have worked much better. However as a breed reference, it's just not clear enough for me.

"You are wrong, you'll see.
I will just place this cat behind him."
I was again referring to Mandrake controlling him, but through her big cat form.
Pass.

"We will watch him run like Nathaniel."
When you search Archibald on Google a guy named Nathaniel "Tiny" Archibald comes up.
Fail. As Boom said, I would have Googled Nathaniel, which would have been in no way connected to Archibald.

"Be warned he has rarely lost..."
I, along with most, consider him a warlord, but he lost his Jackal fight.
Pass.

Overall, I think this was a very good first attempt, but I have to FAIL this. The clues that passed were good, but there were a few that I felt were too generalized and didn't really point to anyone in particular. Next time, try to avoid all the fluff, and be sure that your clues can't apply to everyone. :3 Good try!


Messages In This Thread
A Runner? - by Angora - 01-18-2013, 04:40 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Valentine - 01-18-2013, 09:14 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Angora - 01-18-2013, 09:35 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Phaedra - 01-20-2013, 06:14 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Angora - 01-20-2013, 06:34 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Kri - 01-20-2013, 06:37 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Angora - 01-20-2013, 06:42 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Kri - 01-20-2013, 06:43 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Angora - 01-20-2013, 06:48 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Phaedra - 01-20-2013, 06:51 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Tamira - 01-20-2013, 06:58 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Sybil - 01-20-2013, 07:01 PM
RE: A Runner? - by Tamme - 01-20-2013, 07:03 PM

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