My body is shaky, my breath near as shaky as I hold back childish sobs. I already knew my love was being rejected, and it was no use hiding it now. My eyes deepened as I am hit with this realization. My muscles tense and relax with each shaking breath I take in, my lungs in pain as the salty scent inches up my nostrils. My knees click and clatter as I stare into her battered yet beautiful face, losing myself in her endless beauty. My leafy green pools sweep over her tangled golden mane, admiring the glittering strands of gold.

"They are useless, and they can stay where they are meant to be."

A solemn yet serious look crosses my gentle features as I stare at Ru, inhaling deeply before gently shaking my head. "Oh Ru, tears are not useless. You know they aren't useless, don't you?" I simply take in a long, shaky breath before letting the rest of my words ring. "The sole reason we cry is to release what pain, anger, fear, and regret we've been bottling up for too long." I close my lips, which twitch uncontrollably as I remember my time after mother died. I had wept for hours, days, on end. All because I knew just why she died, because she had me.

It was my fault my family crumbled, my father slaughtered, my mother sinking into deep depression. I was nothing to them now, just a poor boy they failed to raise to be a tough, rough fighter like my father. That's what they had been planning anyway.... turning me into a monstrous demon for an army to follow into war. That's what mother's equine mate had wanted to happen to me. Turn me into a slave, a monster forever trapped in chains, forced to kill upon sight. A shiver runs down my spine, knowing that killing another was against the way I work. I mean, I could barely bring myself to attack Ru, much less kill a horse.

Guilt and regret, fear and pain, all flooded from my heart as I stare at Ru, my skin producing oceans of sweat. My heart feels as heavy as a stone as I feel Ru's muzzle touch my cheek just as I pull away, speaking before I should think. Ru's soft, understanding eyes turn to solid silver as she gazes at me, speaking with a fierce tone. I knew it was going to happen. I suddenly feel the need to slam my head against a tree and wail at how stupid I was. I inhale, nodding my head. "I understand. I got lost... spoke before I thought." Breathe in, go on. "I'm sorry." I watch her turn away, beginning to stride away from me. I was torn, wondering if I should follow her or stand and watch her body fade away into the dark.

I do not think, I follow my heart. It leads me forward, my legs moving as I keep a steady gait, moving after Hotaru. I swipe my mind clean of this happening, the slate clean. But I knew that some day in the near future, the thought would resurface and I would be reminded of my childish desires.

My desires to hold a lasting love. One that wouldn't be destroyed by the hands of men, or by the hands of Gods.

"Talk"