He cared. Sasha, who didn’t care for anyone but his brother had made a little room for her. She was not wounded by him outright saying that no one compared to Kostya – she knew it to be true. It had never been a competition and it never would be (after all, she’d lose).

Whatever the depth of his feelings for her, they were there and she felt reassured because of it. The idea that she was scaring him off, with her too-honest, too-caring mannerisms, had been one she had been wrestling with for quite some time. At least that could leave her alone now.

How could she continue to feel sad in the face of those gentle kisses?

When he mentioned how he would have brought her with them, she looked over to him again “That’s exactly why I would uproot our family. For my ‘moody bastard’ of a mate,” The harsh words are foreign on her tongue and she could not even get them out without a light laugh – she reached out to tug at his mane in a playful manner at the ‘bastard’ part – before brushing her muzzle on his cheek and growing serious again. “Sasha, you’re part of my life and part of my family. I would have gone with you – Arty would’ve too. Iona would follow in her own time, like she always does.” He would not have even had to ask – all he would have done was come to say goodbye to her and she would have brought it up.

Just as she had moved away moments ago, she moved closer again. “Nocturne became home in part because of you.” Of course, Iona and Arty had a part to play. In that dreadful, speculative situation – she would choose her blood before him, as he would choose his over her. Perhaps that was part of why this worked, because there were others that they cherished more than they cherished each other.

But still. “If I could bring you nothing more than a moment of happiness every day, I would follow you forever so that I could be there – so that I could do that.” And of course, simply being around him made her happy so that part took care of itself.

Well most of the time. Though she did not blame him for her sadness today – it was all her and her troublesome thoughts, raising her hopes a little too high in comparison to his intentions.

“I would have wanted to leave anyway. Nocturne wasn’t safe.” Eventually she would have brought up the idea – rather loving the idea that her son could grow up somewhere without the threat of demons and all their terrible powers. Well mostly terrible, anyway. She wanted her family to be safe and if taking them away from Nocturne was how they could achieve that, she would do it. “Before we arrived there, Iona and I wandered too. It would have been easy to move on again.” There had been no attachment to the physical land, just those she had met while there.

His response was not unexpected. “No you wouldn’t. You could, though.” He wouldn’t ask but in reality she wouldn’t need him to. She’d still wait. It was foolish, certainly, but it did not feel foolish to her. She would search and she would wait, filled to the brim with hope at finding him again.

After all, for whatever reason he had chosen her. He allowed himself to care for her and unlike him, Aly did not have the courage to ask why. Perhaps there was no reason at all. Either way, she could not brush that aside. So she would wait.

“Maybe next time,” Oh because of course there’d be a next time, “you could maybe think about at least saying goodbye? If only so I won’t worry after you.” As much as the topic of goodbyes weighed on her, she smiled then and nudged him gently with her wings. “As much.”