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11-13-2013, 07:58 PM
There is nothing quite like the feeling of loneliness. Bitterness and mounds of emotional pain bury me. Its like quick sand. Once you've been trapped there is no escaping. Traveled many nights and days, years perhaps, with this frightfully sweet feeling. Being alone gives you time. To recover and think but being alone for too long drives one insane. I've began to have conversations with myself. Just like I am now. Walking through this forest with my wings folded up neatly to my sides, thinking inside about this whole state of mind. Explaining any and everything with you. You? Myself... Whoever is listening. Perhaps my mother can hear my thoughts and think down upon the remorse depressed being I've become. How unhappy she would be... I'm only searching for some peace to fill the void in me but it seems that no matter where I travel, the pain grows deeper. Sinking its teeth into my mushy heart. Sometimes when I walk on, I feel as though I am gone. As if the soul that rests inside, slinks along behind my physical body. Maybe this is the way I deal with the thoughts inside. To detach myself from this decaying body... One that used to be so joyful and full of life. The dappled dun body that walks with a careless grace. Something so unprofessional. As if losing my crown and my home really took away from me. Perhaps this is how it is to be hollow. Feeling-less and unsure. What happened to embracing happiness and hoping for the future's bright and loving days? I'll search now, in this lost forest. Under the pale moonlight. The cool crisp, refreshing air. [ooc- she is dealing with the tragedy of losing her homeland to an invasion, losing her title and crown as queen, losing loved ones including her mother. so depressed Nevaeh is looking for a new family and friends to pull her from the drowning depression.] |
