you're gone and
i gotta stay high
— all the time

the name he whispers, it's etched into her mind, a prominent name she will try to remember for him. the title falls from his lips before the wind takes it, carrying it far away from her, letting it escape in a whim. to this stag she makes a promise, a promise whispered through closed mouths, that she will help this man find his ophelia. she does not know his name and he does not know hers, but that does not keep her from giving him a promise that she will keep. somewhere deep down her old self begins to crawl out from the wreckage, fractured but not shattered. she lets loose a smile as she gazes up at this stud she's laid herself down beside, this alabaster stranger that she already shares a connection with even though words from their lips are merely swept away and unheard. in this time she wants to lean forward and murmur to him that she will find his lost ophelia, but she knows her words will merely be swept away in the relentless winds.

icy crown pierces the sky, regal frosted skull raised up, blue eyes sweeping over her. timidly she meets that gaze, body trembling not because she was cold, but because she was afraid. bringing her fragile hind legs towards her stomach, she tried to keep herself calm. under the winds she wants nothing more than to bring herself closer to this mysterious man and hide away from the strong gale that whips their manes about. his head falls, forced down by the storm, like a mother not wanting her child to witness the horrors of the world it pushes down the beast's head. she feels her own head sink lower, nearly meeting the white on black flesh of this stallion. her heart stops then and there as her muzzle hovers above the moist skin of this stranger, who really wasn't a stranger but a friend, one made through their actions rather than their hushed words. if he doesn't move, her nose is likely to bump into his shoulder as she struggles to move her head away from his surface.

there in the silence she finds herself drowning, sinking slowly into the dark waters they had fallen into together. she's reaching her head up to gasp for air that she did not need, that she could not have. she wanted nothing more than to thrash about to bring herself to the surface, find her hooves beneath solid earth, but instead she keeps calm, loosening her tense figure. as the violet light of the magma falls over her, the rain washing away her sorrows, she closes her eyes, letting the world become dark and empty, all except the brilliantly white, scarred and broken man that lays before her. she wants to rest her head against his body as she finds this peace, hands woven of serene, beautiful light wrap around her, keeping her safe.

for just a heart beat she forgets where she is, and in a panic her eyes fluttering open with crystalline lashes catching falling drops. she sees the dirtied man before her with his bleached locks clinging to a muscular neck, a crowned brow and ears tipped in midnight. she sweeps her gaze over him, finally taking in the details of his glory. a muscular body marred with scars, black skin revealed as the scars dance along his hide. a horn of ice rising from his brow with eyes that match. crimson staining his alabaster skin, making her cringe as she recalls her own blood pouring out, staining her golden coat, painting her body into a gruesome sunset, wracked in spams upon the ground as her life slipped away.

she shakes and shivers at these thoughts, scraping her side against the stone and letting herself slip along the wet ground. she does not fear getting another inch closer to the stallion, as for some reason she has found herself looming over this fear, no longer controlled by it. she was tired of letting it control her, taking advantage of her innocent mind. she had finally proved herself to be dominant over this beast of fear, no longer would she cower in the shadows when a stallion approaches, she would step into the light and let the world see her figure illuminated in rays of light. she would finally become the fallen angel that she was.