AURELIA

I am just another failure. Perhaps the biggest failure. I've made my mark, but it's a scar that the horses I've damaged will never forget. I want to go hide. I want to sulk, cry, scream, and die. I can't. Not yet. I need to save Shilva. I need her to live. She's become part of me, and if she dies there will be an void in my heart that just gets deeper and deeper. I know why Mauja is hidden behind walls now. Perhaps he doesn't want to look like me, crazy. Perhaps sanity is hiding your feelings. Perhaps it is letting no one inside.

The glass border is just ahead, and I bound towards it. Freedom. I'll be free now. I'll leave Cheveyo, Resplendence, Alysanne, Kaj, Quilyan, the Lesbians (Ktulu and Lakota), Brisa, and everyone else behind. I admit it, I'm happiest to be leaving Kahlua. How the hell did she beat me? I still feel the sting of my own burns on hmy hindquarter, and it doesn't fail to remind me that I've just lost my home. I've just left the only place I've ever loved. The only place I've ever felt peaceful. The only place I've ever had friends. I guess now I can start over. Learn to be normal. I can learn to hide my emotions and become more appealing to everyone. I can put up a fake front of happiness. No one will know I want to die. No one will ever know I'm sad. They'll think I'm happy, and this is perfectly fine now. I can accept it.

I dance around the glass shards and take off, out of the World's Edge. I take off out of my old home. I leave them behind. I don't invite them to come with me, because they wouldn't want to. I'm the villain here. The villain always looses. I guess I should've studied the fairy tales my mom used to tell me. The perfectly happy Queen always wins, not the pyromaniac.


I've galloped a while now, but I've only made it to Thistle Meadow. Sweat beads off of my ivory coat. It's a struggle galloping across this meadow with the sun overheating my back, making me sweat that much more. I can't help but obsessively think about Kahlua. She's like an angel. If I ever see her again, I'm not going to be able to look her in the eye. I'll start to cry. I don't want to cry anymore, but the tears that are still rolling down my cheeks can't be stopped. Can I please just run away? Can I please just jump into the lava at the Heart? I'm so not fucking special. I wish I was special, but I'm a creep-- a weirdo. What am I even doing here? I don't belong here. Everyone knows that. I'm a mare named Kill, not Aurelia. I'm not an angel. I'm a devil. I don't float around like a beautiful feather. I'm more like a grenade. A grenade that explodes over and over again.

The river comes up in my view and I increase my pace until I reach it. I slide to a halt once I do reach it. My head drops to the beautiful blue water. My lips move around in the cool blue water as I suck up water to my stomach. It quenches my thirst. My head eventually rises again and the liquid drips off of my kissers. I wade forward, my hooves sloshing around in the water. I know I can't get off task, so I pick up my gallop and continue to head for the Dragon's Throat. The tears stop falling from my aching eyes, but my cheeks are stained now.


I stop at the borders. My previously wet cheeks are dry now. I seem normal, but I'm not. I'm nervous. "Africa! Healers!" My voice is loud. The urgency in my voice is extremely obvious. Will they gallop to me and try to heal me? I unfurl my wing and put Shilva's body in the red sand. My muzzle drops to her limp body. My lips caressing her scales. I don't want her to die. Can they heal her? They better come and start healing her, not me. My burns and bruises may look bad, but they don't hurt half as much as loosing Shilva would hurt.

"Talking"
ooc:; i was going to do third person so no one knows exactly what aurelia is thinking, buuuut she's hard to write like that <33 okay, so instead of making a thread in all these different locations, I decided to just write on long post about her galloping over here. The first part, she is leaving the edge, then she takes a break in the thistle meadow, and ends up at the throat borders.