CANEO
Realism [+4]
I was dying when I read you had dressed poor Caneo up as a princess! I just wish I could have better inferred that from your post, rather than your summary. You wrote about the costume, but I only had puzzle pieces of what it was from the post’s body. However you consistently employed the costume in each post, even having it block Caneo’s vision in the first, which was excellent!

You have a strong eye for fighting with great and very realistic responses to attacks and defenses. You have great timing and movement, mentioned surroundings a bit and breed even further. I really enjoyed how much you employed your injury throughout the fight, although I think you took too much damage in your first post given that the damage was 3/6. A completely lame leg such as you described would be more fitting of a 6 damage, least of all that and a bitten spine. However you took excellent damage in your last post.

Overall, fantastic realism!


Emotion [+2.5]
I haven’t read Caneo until now and this thread made me fall in love with him. You brought him to life in each post, giving motive and feeling to every event that occurred. Loved it.


Prose [+5]
You have some truly beautiful writing. I really enjoyed the imagery you employed and the wonderful flow all throughout.


Readability [+3]
Readable all throughout. Especially good in that first post with describing your attacks.


Finally tally: 43+(14.5*2)= 72 HP


KAJ
Realism [+3]
I really loved Kaj’s costume, I thought it was adorable <3 I’d also liked to have gotten a better feel of what all the costume entailed from your post than your summary. I learned some things from the post, but didn’t get the whole picture from it. I also saw you utilizing the costume too much to your benefit, and not to your disadvantage. A costume that’s bulky like that, especially with a mask, would definitely have hindered you throughout the fight. I also consider the costumes to be like what you’d pick up to wear from a halloween store, fabrics, plastic, foam, etc. not metal which gives you dagger hooves - if you’re ever unsure about the limits of your costumes, please feel free to ask us and we’ll be happy to let you know!

You had great attacks and defenses, and I really liked Kaj considering some of his past fighting experiences during this battle. There was some mention of surroundings and a good reference to Caneo’s breed/stat differences and height differences all throughout which was awesome. Your injuries were well described, although I think you took too much damage with the fracture in your first post. I generally shy away from fractured/broken bones in general, and even then only with the max damage (6), which although in that post it was a 5 damage, still didn’t need to be so severe. Even with a 6 damage though, injured bones have a place only if extremely realistic, which in this case I didn’t think it was. Caneo is a lighter breed, which you mentioned several times, so he shouldn’t have had the strength. Now he was aiming near your wing area, but he did not directly aim at it, you targeted it there, so again the fracture just didn’t seem necessary, and it didn’t seem to come into play enough in your next post to sustain the drama of such a severe wound. I thought you took excellent damage in your last post though.

Overall, great job with the attacks and breed references!


Emotion [+2.5]
Kaj could be felt throughout your posts, particularly in your last one as he struggled with his pride at falling to a younger, less experienced fighter, which I loved seeing.


Prose [+2.5]
You have some lovely writing and metaphors, but it felt choppy and blocky in some places, and was definitely rushed in your second post which took away from the overall effect.


Readability [+2.5]
Your posts were very readable, just a couple missed commas and sometimes some weird tense interchanges in your first post.


Finally tally: 45+(10.5*2)= 66 HP

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Kaj still continues to round 2 due to having the highest judged score among the non victorious fighters!