I really wish now that I hadn't came out here, so that maybe some part of my image of him would still be pristine. But no. He's a gutless coward. The woman speaks, but I don't hear her. I only hear him. "I'm sorry." He's sorry for being a big disappointment to me? He's sorry for that shitty apology for being my father? He's sorry for fucking mother and conceiving me? Glacial eyes return the steady gaze as he speaks once more. "I.. was not expecting to see you out here," Of course not, just like I wasn't expecting to see you here either. Just like I wasn't expecting to have the dreams of you shattered into billions of pieces.
However, I watch him. What did mother see in him? What did she see in him that day that they met on the beach? Certainly not this. No, mother wouldn't have taken a bite of this boring mass. He must have had fire that day. So where was that fire now? A grim smile tugs at my lips. "I forgive you." My words are soft, with an underlying sadness in them. I feel shrunken now, like I had been scolded, yet no scolding had taken place. I wanted to run, and cry. To feel sorry for myself and for the father that would never be there. Would this be the only time I would meet him? More than likely. I glance at this black woman who has been silent, before asking one last question of my so called father. "Where is the fire, father? Where is your fire?" The question is sad, full of pity for him, full of the turmoil I was feeling inside. I look at the black mare, my eyes trailing over her. I just wish I could turn off a switch for my feelings. Then maybe I wouldn't feel so shitty. "I'm sorry, miss. You seem to have been caught in an awkward spot, Hm?" I say, sarcasm lining my voice. I wonder what might have happened had I not come upon them. Had I been a few minuets faster.
"talk talk talk talk "
Tagged;; @[Mauja] @[Chernobyl]
Words;; 360 words
Notes;;
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[O] he watched a falling star at the edge of the world;
