It hurt to hear the crack of his voice, to know he was hurting as much as she to remember that horrible night. She regretted a lot of things, in fact she regretted most of the choices in her life. But that was a scenario she wished fervently to take back. Lakota hated that she'd hurt him, and she winced before continuing on. It hurt to remember, clearly it hurt the both of them. But all the pain was washed away with that simple, age-old nickname. Her frail shoulder slumped, as if all the tension had been dissolved and she was left weary and unsure what to do. She looked to him once more for guidance, only for shame to turn aside her gaze. Of course Leo hadn't loved her less when Hana was born, they'd just split the time they shared together. The intensity with which he loved her had never faded.
"Of course not...I'm so sorry, fratello," she murmured. But it was hard for her to accept, because Rasta was not her blood. She was a random mare, who had come and taken her brother away to an entirely different herd, until there was no time left for them to split. Until he had faded away, chosen Rasta over Lakota. Or so she had considered it. Whether or not she was in the right place to consider such a thing was debatable, but Lakota had learned that she needed to be more in-tune with her emotions. As much as she considered them a weakness, it promoted a more open relationship with her brother. And for that, she would do anything, no matter how uncomfortable.
Unable to withhold a snort of bitterness she smiled wryly. "I wasn't attractive anyways," she quipped, unable to help it. Only for her to frown at his continuing explanation. "I would have understood. Kept your contact with her minimal. Or so I like to think. Nothing, not even a mate, would come before you fratello." Whether or not it would have happened, well...it was in the past.
"I know. Fool is what I do, apparently..." she murmured, though her smile was tentatively warm. Hopeful. Their private language, their ties to the past she'd rather forget in any other term, was what sealed the deal in the end. Stepping closer, she chanced the ability to be near to him, just once more. "Where...where is she? I suppose...I suppose I should do my best to get over this. Stop being such a fool?" As much as she would despise having to apologize to Rasta, much less get to know her as more than just a name and face, Lakota owed her brother at least that.
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[P] when the world gets loud, I get louder
