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the Rift

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Lace the Silverthorn Posts: 459

Deceased atk: 5 | def: 9 | dam: 5.5

Stallion :: Equine :: 15.3 hh :: 14 HP: 65 | Buff: NOVICE

Fajira :: Plain White Dragon :: Fire Breath Chan

#11

09-10-2012, 04:43 AM

LACE

Who, in his mind,
has not probed the dark water?

Her reply was unexpected. It made made him hesitate, mouth opening to retort... But no sharp words came to mind, nothing that held enough truth to want to slip over the tongue. Lace took a step back with a confused look, for a moment completely forgetting about the dragon that was Mirage and the fact that he should be fearful and cautious. Was it really true, that he didn't care why she was there? He wanted to say yes, the entire self defense mechanism that worked to keep her out wished to throw it in her face, rub it in that he had no interest in her and that he couldn't care less where she was and why she pretended to care. But even now it seemed that he couldn't lie so easily. Because it was a lie. For some reason that he couldn't discern in this chaotic state of mind, Mirage's presence was important, and even more important was the reason why she had chosen to appear just here, at this very moment. What she wanted from him, why she had chosen to interest herself in just him, of all strangers that surely had to pass through the Threshold.

It wasn't something he was willing to admit to himself however, so instead he struggled to find something else to say, something that would make her quiet, push her away and make the mare give up on him. The silence was building up quickly between them, accented by the whipping wind, the thunder and the never ending roar of the thrashing ocean. He had to think of something fast, before it was too late and anything he said would taste of untruth and weakness...
Why don't you just lie to her then?
He frowned and discarded the thought, almost unconsciously repulsed by the thought of lying.
You lie to yourself, so what's the difference?

Lace turned his head and watched with puzzled expression as the little White landed in the sand before him, exactly in the middle between himself and Mirage. What was she doing? Her small frame exuded indifference as she pawed at the sand, digging away the dry upper layers until she had made herself a small burrow. Her inner voice was dry and down-to-earth, as if she was commenting on the state of her claws rather than the roller coaster of his mind. He hadn't noticed the communication between her and Akaith, too occupied with his own state of mind to pay any heed to the bonded; she carefully hid the memory of the advice within the nooks of her own mind that always remained private to him, and made sure to close off the doubts she had about the method. She wanted to help him, but his pain had always been hers as well, and to purposely go poking his wounds was excruciating for her. Still she did so, because she trusted the golden queen that had become her friend and beloved playmate, and she knew that the black-and-gold didn't want to harm her bonded.

I don't lie to myself Lace protested, surprised and confused by the sudden conversation. They never argued much, and never about something like this; he was more puzzled than angry though, frowning and shifting the weight between his feet as he tried to understand what she was trying to accomplish.
You do she insisted and fixated pale, misty gray eyes upon him with an intensity that made Mirage's eyes seem mild and pleasant. Lace recoiled another step, as if trying to ward off the words that resounded in his mind. Unwelcome. Painful.
You keep telling yourself how you deserve any pain that comes to you, how despicable and dishonest you are. You keep going on and on about something that is long behind you, chewing it like tasty meat.
How could I allow myself to ever forget about it? he tried to defend himself, ears folding backward at the tone with which she spoke.
Who says you should? she retorted. Remembering and wallowing is not the same.
I don't wallow!
Then why aren't you running with other four legs already?
I have no interest in..
Why sad when they leave you behind after saying no? Why not run with them, play with them, talk to them and let them rely on you, when it's what you want more than anything..
"Because I don't want to betray anyone ever again!" he spewed out, desperately trying to finish the sentence before she cut him off yet again; not realizing that the cry had been made out loud until he could hear the agonizing tone of his own voice.

He could have hit himself. Instead he swirled around to look at the large golden dragon that hid the mare he had met, cold sweat breaking out at the thought that she would have heard him. But instead of a ferocious predator clad in scale and claw his eyes landed upon the small, soft form of the black mare, resting in the sand with shadows dancing around her, thrown long behind her by the flickering light of the fire. Fire? When had she.. and what about the dragon? What was going on here!? A feeling of desperation urged the grulla to turn around and run away, far from the eyes of the three dragons that pierced him like spears, as if they were digging around in his soul in search for.. for something. But before he had the chance to run the words of the mare landed upon his turned back, wrapped around his legs and made him halt. Again he felt the unreal tiredness wash over him and made the steely sides heave in a deep sigh.

What he wanted from her? It was something he had never even thought about. Did he even wish for anything? But even as the thought crossed his mind he realized what it was he wanted, what he feared and what he was running from. It was the same thing, really.

"What I want from you, huh.." he mumbled, barely audible over the storm. "Then will you judge me, Mirage? Will you listen to me and tell me how to pay for my sins?" He turned and looked at her across the dune, suspecting but not entirely sure of whether she had picked up on his outburst from before. She must have an inkling of what it was that weighed on him now, must be trying to piece the puzzle together in her mind. The mare was so intelligent, so clever with words. But would she realize the details, and the importance it had to him? Would she be able to comprehend his agony, or was he going to be waved off as being silly for resting on something trivial? For some reason he doubted it.

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