Megaera

Megaera did need the words. Like with her return to the throat, the weight of guilt, the crippling weight of self-doubt, could only be lifted when someone else knew, when someone else understood. She was unequivocally a social creature. If her only outlet was her own mind, every bad feeling could only circulate and build inside her until she could confess it to someone she trusted. Only in the recitation or her demons could they begin to be vanquished; absolution through confession. She had been alone once. Though surrounded by those of her father’s blood, she had been alone and for that half of her life she had been stunted. One bee cannot build a hive; one wolf is not a pack; a single soldier can vanquish no army. . As strong as the heart of the shield maiden was, she needed her tribe. Later, Meg would thank every star in the heavens, every single one of those little guiding lights that had brought her here, for she could not have made it thought this night on her own.

Gaucho stood beside her. Gaucho. For the second time she had laid her heart bare to him and the great stallion and he had not turned her away. No, he did not reject her now, but his voice broke the silence and called her blessed. Blessed! The girl quaked at that sentence from him. Her gaze was rapt upon his face and even in the low light he shined in her eyes. Father he was like to her, protector and idol. He was the voice of their God, confessor and friend.

Unbelievable it might be, that anything could have torn Meg’s gaze from Gaucho, but it was her own name in the mouth of Voodoo that broke the reverie. “I’m sorry Meg. You’re very brave” Her head turned, and black eyes looked on the grulla stallion with as much wonder as she had the dun. All the love, the devotion that was in her was doubled. Only Voodoo stood in her sight, but as far as the mare was concerned he stood there as proxy, representing the entirety of Dragon’s Throat. The friends she had made and those she had yet to meet; the ground beneath her; every tree in the Oasis. Every dune and grain of sand; The Blood Tree and the Diviner’s Fire. She belonged to them now, just as much as they were hers. The Sultan had her love, but this land had her soul.

She looked between the two and had no more words, for none could express her gratitude. It would take her lifetime, but it was the only that she could give for what she was being given. A lifetime of repayment, service, protection and love. A life’s devotion from a little warrior.

She didn’t answer when Gaucho posed his question, but followed Voodoo’s gaze to the ground. The sight of the bone puzzled her now. Minutes ago it had been everything, so huge and important, and now it was only dust fading into the sand. Hesitantly, carefully she tested herself. One black hoof reached out from where she stood to drag through the spot. Some of the fragments shifted, a few drifted below the slow sweep of sand. She felt no pain to see them go. Once, twice, three more times, Megaera disturbed the sand until every piece had sunk out of view.

Over.

Done.

Gone

And in the absence of that burdensome sight the question came back to her. Could she do it again? It was exhilarating prospect and without thought she fell inside herself. In the others’ eyes should would only stand still and straight for those few moments, eyes closed and breathing even. In her mind and heart she ran, searching for that source, that pit of glorious flame. She found it in the very center of all she was, bright and hot and beautiful. Slowly, gently, Meg tried to coax it out but when it would not come she pushed. It started to give. Even on the outside, a dim glow began to emerge above her heart, Yes! It was coming!

NO!

She had pushed too far. She had called on energy and power when there was none to be spared. With a pained cry, a muffled scream cut short like her breath ran out, the mare crumpled. Her two front knees fell to the ground and she shook violently from head to hoof. A second passed as she struggled, then succumbed to exhaustion and let herself sink all the way down to the ground. Megaera felt like she could have sobbed, could have wailed and screamed through all the emotions of the past few hours but she was so tired now. Tears made their slow way down from her eyes and down past lips the trembled with every shaking breath. For several long minutes she made no sound or motion but a few ratting breaths. “Yes… I can.” Her voice, normally so sure and strong, was a faint whisper. “It’s there, I can feel it there….But not now…I cannot do it now.”

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Tags: @[Gaucho] - @[Voodoo]

faithful like a soldier