Your parents must have known your future downfall, or did you name yourself after your dependence? Well, until you tell us we'll just have to assume the worst. // He is dependent on his drugs, constantly.
I could take you on, despite our similarities--you lack ponderosity! // Both are shire/draft breeds. He is a heavy set character.
I like that song that is named after you. There are no lyrics to get stuck in my head, so I give an A+ to I-doser. // I-doser is a reference to his drug habits.