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Breakdown.

Kaj had hit his limit, the load which he could safely hold upon his shoulders. Even mountains were capable of crumbling into the sea, Gods capable of tears, of faults. His exhaustion was something he could no longer hide from his family, despite the valiant efforts he took to conceal his nightly terrors from their awareness. It was one of the blessed advantages to sleeping in solitude, where nobody was aware that said 'sleeping' did not transpire. He did not bother anyone when he awoke with a choked yell captured in his sea-glass throat, visible to all who could have been bothered to care to see how pitifully obvious it was that his nights were not spent in peace. His patrols had ramped up, their numbers spiking as he gave Protectors more and more patrols off, taking their spots if only to keep himself awake along the path. His knees ached, his hooves more so, but the pain kept him lucid against the insanity of his lack of sleep.

His heart was far more worn and battered in the process.

Fighting with Kahlua had taken his heart and smashed it upon the ground, leaving Kaj slinking back to retrieve it after he'd walked away from her in his fury, his regret. Losing the two brothers he'd always depended on the most, forcing down his secrets, his emotions regarding the fight and everything he'd lost - Resplendence had been too fragile in the aftermath of Quilyan's abandonment, he couldn't have gone to her. Losing Evangeline to Thor, who had reacted to him with anger, with prejudice and jealousy. Yet another who Kaj had let down, another failure to add to his ever-growing list. Then the Goddess, losing Archibald to the sorrow of his losses, helpless to aid him in his recovery. Unsure he would even welcome the Storm Bringer's advances when all the buckskin did was bring about further damage.

Then Destrier and Quilyan had waltzed back into the Edge, never deeming to seek out Kaj, never caring enough to spare him of the horrors he still faced. So he carried on, ever weaker, wondering whether it was appropriate for him to cry. His father, the bastard, had never allowed him that kind of release. It was something shameful, to be scorned, for a stallion to cry. Kaj had no doubt it was the truth, but he desired so deeply to just let it all go.

How he'd ended up at the medic's tent was beyond him, but his eyes were swimming with black dots. Vengeance for his ever-evasion of the sleep his body so needed. The king stumbled, making a racket even as he tried to be quiet. His soul yearned for the only companion he had left, broken heart piercing all his internal organs as the shards jostled about with his wandering steps.

"Zus!" he cried, voice broken with the promise of tears that he couldn't shed. Knees buckled and he swayed, lurching into the nearest tree to prop himself up. Praying to all the Gods that existed above that Resplendence was near, that she was where he'd thought she'd be. "Aardbei, alsjeblieft! Ik heb je nodig!" There was no way she could understand what he was saying, aside from the nicknames he so often used for her. But the cries were plaintive, and he hoped that she would come running, because he needed her. He was so broken, so ruined. She was supposed to be a doctor, right? Surely she could fix him?

@[Resplendence]