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Lie to me
please, so
I can live
my own,
for you
Do you remember any of it?
How could he not?
The pain?
Of course. Of course, it was everything. It had been and maybe it always would be.
Your...
Death?
Yes. It had been everything he'd ever wanted and more. And now he was awake and alive and he knew only because Tiamat was telling him so, pleading that he stay that way. Becoming a silken figure, joining himself with death's great white cloak, had been heaven. This life had to be hell by comparison. And yet...
Don't ever let that change, ok?
He smiled softly, pressing his body against hers with tender warmth. "Of course I won't, Tiamat. "
A gentle sigh, the softest resignation. "I'm not going anywhere."
Not because I don't want to, Tiamat. But because of you, of this herd and the creatures in it that somehow care for me. Because I could not go without causing pain--and because I would live an immortal life of suffering before I made another soul here cry.
He was blessed. He was blessed to walk this earth still when he had thought so many times of leaving it, when perhaps he did not deserve to still stand for those thoughts and that ungratefulness.
He remembered but he would not speak of it. If he did, would she catch the wistfulness in Ashamin's tone? The longing? Blessed but cursed, wishing for any chance to knit himself back into an eternal expanse of cloth, of souls, of heaven, he feared that he would betray himself. No, he could not speak of it.
Lochan knew. That was enough, that was already one more soul than he wished to hurt that was in pain. Lochan knew and Lochan could not forget, not something like that.
"And you?" he asked, striving to press his nose to hers, wishing the rough pitted horn he bore could be gone, wishing nothing would separate them. "Can you promise me the same?"
His heart was a tentative drum, his white-rimmed eyes were betraying his pain despite his best attempts to hide it. He was earnest, when he asked her. Ashamin the Haruspex neded to know:
Can you promise me this lie that we all tell each other in life, this lie of eternal standing beside each other so no one has to admit that someday, somehow, they will succumb to an end?
ashamin & lochan
@Tiamat (I suck)
See Ashamin's profile for more information about Lochan, Rakt, and his various items.
All magic and force allowed, barring death and permanent injury.
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