I had a suspicion from the beginning that I had a bit more experience when it came to life than Caleb had. It wasn’t based off of events seen firsthand or anything else for that matter; but of age. I had been around longer, lived more years than he. However, I wasn’t fully sure. Perhaps his lust was due to his age? Or possibly because of it just being him. Though it appeared to me after the other males I had met, that few seemed to have strong restraint against me. Particularly the ones more experienced with trauma and heartbreak knew better.

Caleb was different, naïve in the fact that he didn’t feel. I never really believed him before, but I knew that the chances of him shedding a tear over me if I were lying half dead in front of him would be low. I never truly grasped that idea before now, before I attempted to let my sorrowful voice grasp his attention only to rely on my promiscuity to even get him to listen. And with that, I watched as his body language changed toward me. I watched as he grew silent, not having a single word to say aside from the fire that sparked in his eyes with the way that I spoke to him.

Then he stepped toward me, and I stepped one closer to him. That smile still playing on my lips as my eyes searched his face before I stretched out my neck; creams dancing with the colors of the symbols glowing around us, before I hoped to reach his jawline with my nose. I wasn’t sure how far I was going to go before I decided to possibly just go for it and delve in deep with him; or speak my mind. I gave in to many different situations in my life. This seemed rather small in the grand scheme of things; but I couldn’t help but remember seeing Temb’s broken face as he walked away from me in the fields all while I held that deeply seducing smile upon my lips and in my eyes.

I wouldn’t let that idea ruin the possibility of telling Caleb the truth. Both because I didn’t want to deal with the statue of a feathered beast glaring at me around every corner, and because I didn’t want to have to constantly think of Tembovu every time I was with him. Though I was beginning to learn that beggars can’t be choosers. “Caleb, love.” I spoke in a hushed silk tone. “Listen to me.” I muttered under my breath, allowing each exhale to graze across his neck. Perhaps now he would listen.




Rexanna