Яikyn

She answers quickly, that there exists a need to wander within herself – a notion which settles unevenly in me, the boy who had tried to follow his dam away, who ended up somewhere he had never planned to be. Ever since I have come home, there is a small part of me which looks over my shoulder, out the pathways of the Threshold, over hills and through mountains, to where that forest looms, tall and ethereal.

A need.

I don’t wish for it to grow into such a thing. I would like to think that the wanderlust I feel, the loneliness for Xynia’s no nonsense approach, and elderly Vaelenne’s gracious smile, are only wants, the grasping of an ever needy soul. To think that these feelings that try to tug me away will only deepen makes me frown.

I know nothing of retirement, as she talks of next, and yet I do understand the pressing urge to leave the confines of a cave. Even before I had struck out into the greater world of Loorien, a certain adventurous nature had drug me all across the face of Helovia, my friends in tow. Never had I been known to linger in one spot for too long, and while it may only be my youth which restlessly sends me out into the world, I cannot help but feel that it is an integral part of my being.

As if sensing the direction of my thoughts, she asks of them, the smile that had faded as I waded deep in thoughts, returns to my lips, a sparkle igniting in my golden eyes that reveals of much I enjoy that she has taken such an interest in me.

"To see, and to learn," I answer honestly, though there is more depth to the reality than that, my tenor continuing forward with the explanation of my heart’s yearning for new stretches of road, visions yet unseen, "to meet as many of our kind as I may…"

Truly, I am supposed to be in Helovia on the business of the First Gods, teaching as Vaelenne had asked of me in exchange for her kindness; thus far I have taught no one a single thing. That I have become distracted by the violent course of removing failed Gods from the face of Loorien is little excuse, especially when I think of the people of the Nightwalk, their happiness, and the great struggle that my mother and the Reaper seemed to feel within themselves, so contradictory for their aims being so similar.

"…and to teach what I might, and to learn what they have to share."

in every heart a hole