and you, you knew the hand of the devil.
and you, you kept us awake with wolf’s teeth.

I waited, patiently. Willing to leave if I needed to. I didn’t want to bother him more than I felt as though I had been bothering others. But, he showed up. He walked into the opening, light filtering over him in a soft haze as I gazed at him. Offering him nothing but a small half hearted smile. I held my head a little bit lower this time, closing my eyes for mere moments as his familiar voice filled my ears – ears that trickled blood and a pain in my stomach from the horrible fights we had all been at. I remembered seeing the spotted stallion there for the ones I was in and I hoped that he hadn’t been hurt. Though, as I opened my eyes, my gaze drifting to meet his face blinking with the days renewal. I had awoken him and part of me started to feel like I should just turn and leave – but no. I made my presence known and he was here to chat with me, even though he could tell me to leave and I wouldn’t even mind.

My tail twitched back and forth as I tried to pick the right words to say. “I need advice. But I want to say that it’s not because it’s your job to do. I admire the work you do, Ashamin. But I need advice from a friend. I – I’m having troubles with the heart.” My voice was strong at first. Sure, a person whose job it is to give you advice might not give you the advice you need like a friend could. And I needed the hard truth. I needed a friend’s advice to get me through the next, well, forever. I sighed slightly to myself. Shifting my weight in a kind of awkward manner. “I’m not sure how much about my past you know as I’ve only shared it with one person, but my past has come back to haunt me and I’m not sure what my best course of action would be. You see, I met someone. And I loved him in a.. sensual way. But then I met someone else and I love – loved him more than I’ve ever felt before. I made a bad decision and both have decided to turn away from me. But I started to fix the burned bridge between the second stallion and I. But, I – I think he’s had a child with another and I’m not sure what to do.” I paused, lowering my head. Defeated.

“I just – I can’t be alone anymore, Asha.” Hushed whispers soon took over my voice that was once so strong as I figured out what to say next. Did he want to know who these creatures were? I would be more than willing to tell him. Perhaps he knew more about them than I did, but the thought reverted back to Caleb and how I needed to fix my relationship with him if anything were to come from us and I felt like I had done a great job of building it up with Tembovu. But did Caleb see that? Did he see how warmed up I had been to Temb? Would be not even be willing to take me back? Would be turn me away just as Tembovu had to have a child with another? How was I even certain that the child was his? My head swam with more and more questions until eventually I felt as though I had begun drowning. Suffocating on the overwhelming turmoil that had become my mind. A place that was once so full of solitude and meditation now replaced with darkened thoughts of how much I tend to just screw people’s lives over. Suddenly, the idea that everyone was better off without me grew more and more appealing.

"Talk?"