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05-27-2016, 09:35 PM
we heal with love,
His words still aggravated her, the request to bring her concerns to him first (as if she had been gossiping around the Edge) instead of a prize, but she forced the anger to remain deep so this painful conversation would not last any longer.
She thought back to the meeting, how much it had hurt to hear the promotion of someone else to Moon Doctor - as if she and Evangeline weren’t enough, as if he no longer trusted them to do their jobs. “I will give you that, Tembovu, but...” And here she took a steadying breath because she did not want to turn this into an argument - she did not want to fling angry words at him but speak calmly so he might actually hear her this time. “I also think it is fair for me to ask you to discuss healer matters with me before you make changes to the ranks. Or if not discuss at least let me know before - it may surprise you to learn I try to get to know the other healers and I might have an idea on who would be best suited for the rank. I’ve seen enough Moon Doctors come and go during my stay in the Edge to think it foolish to hand out the promotion freely - even to friends.” Monarchs had promoted to the doctor ranks often, but the fact that Alysanne was the only long-term Moon Doctor left must mean something against this random distribution of promotions.
Then again, the monarchs themselves never seemed to last long enough to see any patterns.
Shaking her dark head sadly, Alysanne made a move to leave - tense and afraid that he would stop her again. But before truly leaving his presence, she paused and looked back to him - that tender sadness no longer hidden behind hot fury or cold stone. “But if my input on the healers means so little that it can be ignored, perhaps it is good you promoted another Moon Doctor. I hope Tilney does well.” Could he possibly understand the contempt that she imagined he felt towards her? How little he seemed to think of her station if he would promote someone who (she believed) was still green, still new, so that he would not need to deal with her any more? These thoughts were hard for her to express outside of anger.
She didn’t want to leave the station, or the herd, but she hated what she was turning into here. Hated what she and Tembovu were bringing out in each other. At least Tembovu would have his trusted Tilney to lead the healers if she did leave.
With one last shake of her head, childishly warning off any further discussion on the matter (and shaking away the tears she could feel, tears of shame and anger and regret) she hurried away from his presence and towards the cliffs. Hopefully the wind and salt air could help clear her mind from both the conversation with her king and their goddess.
She thought back to the meeting, how much it had hurt to hear the promotion of someone else to Moon Doctor - as if she and Evangeline weren’t enough, as if he no longer trusted them to do their jobs. “I will give you that, Tembovu, but...” And here she took a steadying breath because she did not want to turn this into an argument - she did not want to fling angry words at him but speak calmly so he might actually hear her this time. “I also think it is fair for me to ask you to discuss healer matters with me before you make changes to the ranks. Or if not discuss at least let me know before - it may surprise you to learn I try to get to know the other healers and I might have an idea on who would be best suited for the rank. I’ve seen enough Moon Doctors come and go during my stay in the Edge to think it foolish to hand out the promotion freely - even to friends.” Monarchs had promoted to the doctor ranks often, but the fact that Alysanne was the only long-term Moon Doctor left must mean something against this random distribution of promotions.
Then again, the monarchs themselves never seemed to last long enough to see any patterns.
Shaking her dark head sadly, Alysanne made a move to leave - tense and afraid that he would stop her again. But before truly leaving his presence, she paused and looked back to him - that tender sadness no longer hidden behind hot fury or cold stone. “But if my input on the healers means so little that it can be ignored, perhaps it is good you promoted another Moon Doctor. I hope Tilney does well.” Could he possibly understand the contempt that she imagined he felt towards her? How little he seemed to think of her station if he would promote someone who (she believed) was still green, still new, so that he would not need to deal with her any more? These thoughts were hard for her to express outside of anger.
She didn’t want to leave the station, or the herd, but she hated what she was turning into here. Hated what she and Tembovu were bringing out in each other. At least Tembovu would have his trusted Tilney to lead the healers if she did leave.
With one last shake of her head, childishly warning off any further discussion on the matter (and shaking away the tears she could feel, tears of shame and anger and regret) she hurried away from his presence and towards the cliffs. Hopefully the wind and salt air could help clear her mind from both the conversation with her king and their goddess.
alysanne
Aly needed to get one last word in ;D
![[Image: alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png]](http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2014/348/8/6/alysanne_by_schwartze-d89se15.png) made by the lovely tamme |
