Learning how to play [Open Spar]

Learning how to play [Open Spar]

Isopia the Mountain That Knows Posts: 780

Dragon's Throat Apostle atk: 6.5 | def: 10 | dam: 8.0

Mare :: Tribrid :: 18hh :: 3 - is now aging slowly HP: 90 | Buff: NUMB

Hubris :: Royal Bronze Dragon :: Shock Breath & Frost Breath & Babel :: Royal Gold Dragon :: Fire Breath Odd

05-12-2016, 04:51 PM

Isopia, not the most observant mare, hardly heard Seanan coming. She was so raptured by the sound of her own hooves thundering across the ground - a sound she rarely ever heard - that the accompaniment of his own tandem beat hardly drew any response from the demigoddess. It was only once his voice called out to her that she actually started.

Her stride hitched as her death-marked face turned wildly in the wind to try and discern the issuer of the sound. Cold surprise screamed through her veins, and for a moment her flight or fight instincts were evenly matched. She continued moving forward - jerkily, more out of instinct than anything else - until Hubris' voice calmly sang in her mind.

He play too, the dragon silently said, trying to reassure Isopia. He come to play too. Isopia relaxed only a fraction. Playing was foreign enough, much less playing with someone else? Couldn't she just be alone? What drove this pale stallion across the fields towards her? The idea was so foreign and repulsive that she could barely wrap her mind around it. For someone like Isopia, the thought of seeking someone out for fun seemed nonsensical, hence her hesitation to accept Hubris' assessment of the situation.

Suddenly there was no more time to ponder. The stallion drew near, and Isopia felt herself breathe in sharply. Her mind divided between thoughts of Zero and Volterra, for those were the two who had ever really touched her. Thoughts of Zero's comforting embraces were wrapped with bloody memories of Volterra, and the association of disgust and regret that now accompanied thoughts of the ruby-eyed stallion now transferred onto Seanan as he edged closer.

Isopia flinched and her mind recoiled. In other spars - where she knew she was sparring - she might have allowed herself to collide with him, to try and do damage as he came at her. However his interruption of her playing, combined with the overlay of Volterra-feelings that she improperly allowed her mind to ascribe to him, caused all of her hard-won battle training to simply vanish.

"Nnn-" She began to say, meaning to tell him that she didn't want to play with him, but her cries were abruptly cut off. Seanan's shoulder collided with her own, even as she tried to awkwardly shuffle away. Her long legs - so elegant only moments before - now twisted beneath her, catching on one another. Iso's front hooves knocked against one another, causing an audible click as well as sending pain rushing in tingling waves up her legs, and then continued to scrape up and down her cannon bones as she tried to right herself. Perhaps it was because Seanan was so tall and slender, but where their shoulders had collided Isopia could already feel a bruise forming, due perhaps to the boniness of his shoulder. But that wasn't the worst of it. When his shoulder touched hers, her mind recoiled instantly thinking of Volterra. It made her feel dirty, and guilty, and discarded.

A whine of pain rose in her throat, but the demigoddess forced her jaw to remain tightly locked. She was nothing, if not in control of her body's outward reactions.

The demigoddess stumbled once again before she found her balance. Her shoulder bawled in pain as the lower portion of her front legs began to accompany the sensation with their own painful wails. She forced her mind to clear - forced herself to see Seanan, and not the Volterra overlay.

Hubris only chuckled from the air and whistled down towards Isopia. Play, he encouraged silently, doing a showy flip. Play will help.

Isopia turned awkwardly. The front section of her body did not want to support this movement, but did anyways. A ball of water formed behind Isopia. It took the rough form of a dragon, though it was entirely see-through and clearly just composed of liquid. With a snort, the water-dragon was thrust forward by unseen magical hands, directed right towards Seanan's face.

Am I doing it right? Isopia thought with uncharacteristic sarcasm, directed towards her dragon.

Because the air around them was so warm, the water-attack likely wouldn't be too cold. Shocking? Perhaps. It was always a little surprising when someone randomly threw water in your face, wasn't it?

Briefly Iso considered rushing at the stallion to try and have her other shoulder hit his, but decided against it. Although she had temporarily banished the 'Volterra-overlay' (as she had now come to think of it), she wasn't quite ready to willingly place herself so close to him.

For now, ranged attacks would do.

WC: 791
Attack: 1/3

This is the magic Iso used. You don't have to include stuff like this in your posts, but I always find it's nice so that your opponent knows wtf is happening :)

:: [ Magic: EarthxWater (U) | Can create shapes out of the earth or water ]
:: [ Restrictions | Can only create 2 large shapes (large horse size or smaller) or 5 smaller shapes (dog size or smaller); lasts one post in battle. ]

TEACHING NOTES.

Awesome opening post! I really like the light hearted feel I get from Seanan. You described him well enough that I have a good sense of what he looks and moves likes, without it come across forced and whatnot.

One thing that's helpful to do when you're sparring, is to take a look at your stats compared to your opponent. For instance, you have:
STR: 2.0
SPD: 8.0
AGL: 2.0
END: 8.0

And I have :

STR: 8
SPD: 5
AGL: 5
END: 4

Which basically means that you're much faster than Iso is and have way more endurance. But I'm harder hitting and more agile (turning IS hard :P). This is helpful for when you're responding to things. For instance, when I respond to you, I can objectively have Iso be like "DAYYUMMM HE FAST." rather than just relying on your description of Seanan. Things you DON'T want to do, is act like Seanan is more agile than Isopia, because we can see that he isn't. You'd get marked down on realism if you wrote something like that.
So it's always a good idea just to look at those stats, to get an idea of objectively what your opponent is like compared to you.

The biggest thing I noticed is that some of your wording was fairly declarative. When I judge, I'm fairly harsh on what counts as powerplaying. Not everyone is as strict as I am, but it's definitely good to be aware of how strongly you're writing. For instance: It was instinct that curved his path, angling to bring his swifter, lighter frame alongside hers. Saying he is now 'alongside her', is powerplay, because you're forcing Isopia to remain more or less. What if she just flies up into the air? Then he couldn't run alongside her at all. A better way to work it would just be adding 'tried': "It was instinct that curved his path, as he tried to angle his swifter, lighter frame alongside hers. Same with this sentence: Their courses were fast closing now, he was near perpendicular to her. Like I said, those are fairly minor/weak instances, but it's just better to avoid them when you can, so you aren't in the habit of writing that way.

I really like how you mentioned his attack was in front of her wings. So many people forget about pegasus' stupidly big wings! So far everything looks really good!

When the dice are rolled for you, make sure you're making realistic choices about how to take the damage. When it's rolled, you'll see something like this:

Damage: 1d6 rolled for a total of: # + 7 (Iso's damage stat).

The # can be anything from 1 - 6, with 1 being the lowest and 6 being the highest. There's no set scale, but 6 is something like a pretty serious injury - like really spraining a leg, having an open bleeding wound, etc. Whereas a 1 might just be a little shove. So don't take more damage that you're given, and try to stay consistent. So if Iso's rolls a 3 and then next round rolls a 4, the damage you take in the second post should be more than in the first.

So you rolled a 5/6. So this is almost the most damage Seanan can do. But because your damage stat is only a 2, it isn't going to break any of Iso's bones or anything (compare a character like Gaucho for instance. When he punches you, it's really going to hurt, because his damage stat is 8.

Hopefully that all makes sense!

Things to think about for your next post:
Make sure you're taking into account the differences between Seanan and Iso, in terms of breeds, physical stature, and stats; and make sure you're mentioning the environment where appropriate! Isopia is emotionally a little unstable atm, so she has a lot of things/emotions that are going through her mind. Even if Seanan isn't as 'feely' as she is right now, make sure to incorporate what he's thinking and feeling, and why he does the things he does in response, into your post!

Isopia

Abandon hope, all ye who enter here.

^{Image Credits}

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