Ashamin was not afraid when Deimos approached. No, not anymore. The lord held nothing over him, and Ashamin had no obligation to obey. This was simply no longer his herd, so why bow to its lord?

If the Clovenheart knew of the battle within the steel-faced stallion he might have softened his tone, might have bowed his head anyway. He might have touched him, if only to offer him comfort. But Ashamin knew better than to brush noses with the reaper, for whatever power he held was akin to death. If Ashamin was going to live to be free, away from this place, he had to stay alive.

So he held his head high and kept himself at bay--swung his tail to rest before his companions. "Deimos," Ashamin said with a soft nod that ended in a head held high, "I'm glad to see you." And when he said this it was honest, and when he spoke his voice was lifted by unbridled tones. That was the sound of freedom, responsibility to bear the weight of so many others gone. He needed to be his own buck, stand on his own four hooves and at no one else's command.

Still, it was strange to see Deimos now and not be affected by the same reverent and submissive force that had always gripped him in their prior meetings. And it was even stranger still to see Hotaru. Pregnant.

He did not need to be a mare, or an expert on their affairs, to know that his bird was with child. He moved to her swiftly and without shame; this was no longer his herdland, but she would always be his love. He would cross whatever borders he had to to be by her side, and he'd face Deimos' rage without a shred of fear to feel her touch again. Her touch.

Her touch, once pregnant with love and now with its manifestation. His eyes grew bright and strong, threatened to brim with tears, but he hid them under the firm shutting of lids, the soft exhale of admiration. Yes, it was admiration. Admiration for her here, now, standing before him strong despite how obvious the situation before them all was. Ashamin didn't often travel with all of his things.

He reached to wrap around her but found the tender movement troublesome under the bulk of the armor, something that he wished now he could be free of. Still he was close enough to whisper words only for her: "Hotaru, don't worry. I'll never leave you." And when he said this, too, it was honest.

Ashamin looked back at Deimos but stood close to Hotaru, aiming to still press his side against hers loyally. It was time to explain some things, wasn't it?

"I apologize for not attending your last meeting, and for not being able to give you better news now. But after Thranduil challenged me and then fled, I wasn't sure if I would be welcome company at what I assumed would be his resignation party," Ashamin explained with a quiet frown, a flicker of his ears. "I'm leaving now of my own accord, and at no fault of yours. I simply need to find my own way, but I should hope that you and the herd will not fault me for it. I'd like to leave on good terms."

The Clovenheart turned to Hotaru then, to her swollen belly and precious love. Would she accept this, or turn from him? Was there anything he could do to explain, to make her understand that this was not the end or some betrayal? He spoke to both of them but really to her when he said "I would like you to know you will continue to have my loyalty. I hold this herd and those within it above all others, even still." He exhaled, tried to put together the words so maybe they could understand, and turned back to Deimos. "I will neither harm nor steal from members of the Basin while I live outside your borders. Should you need my services as a star reader or a warrior, you have them. All I ask in return is that I not be targeted by your herd and that I might be able to still visit my loved ones here and not be met with hostility."

A slow and steady swallow of air, something like a pleading look. Would Deimos take pity on this, the former haruspex? Would the reaper remember how Ashamin served him, and grant him this one request?

"The Basin was my home when I needed it most," Ashamin said then, thinking back to the weak stag he'd once been, "I will never forget that."


""

ASHAMIN