I didn't have to wait long for Cera, i never did. He was wonderful like that; I called for him and he was there. He breathed my name and before the last syllable fell from his lips I was already greedily burying myself in his feathers. i let his scent and his warmth wash over me and chase away all the anxiety that and heaviness that I'd carried with me all the way from the Threshold. "I'm sorry." I whispered against Cera's flesh. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, really i didn't. I didn't pay attention to where I was going and then I was gone and I didn't mean to leave without telling you and I'm sorry!" I was babbling and as I babled the anxiety and the heaviness came back, but this time it brought guilt with it because I knew I would be leaving Cera again. For the longest time we were all we had, it was us against the world and I was making things different. I was putting the distance back that had been there when our father had been alive. "You know I love you, right?"

When Gaucho arrived I pulled myself away from my brother and turned to face him. Before I even realized what I was doing I was rushing rushing to him. Gaucho had been biggest father figure I'd had in my life, and I was trying to bury myself against him in an effort to hide from my issues. The two of them would definitely be the hardest to walk away from and it made me have more doubts about leaving, but I wanted to get to know Murtagh better. I wanted to actually be his sister and teach him like Cera had taught me and I couldn't do that from the Throat or anywhere else besides the Falls. "And I love you, too." I murmured before pulling myself away from Gaucho, too.

"I uhm... I called for you both because... I was in the Threshold and Unc- Archibald asked me to go live in the Falls..." I had been looking down at the ground, but as my voice trailed I lifted my gaze to Cera first then to Gaucho. "My mom is there... and I have a little brother..." My eyes trailed back to Cera and I stared at him. He, if anyone, would understand how it felt being separated from a sibling that you cared about. We had spent our entire childhood miles and miles apart because of our parents. I had an opportunity to reconnect with my mother and to spend time with and love my little brother and it wasn't something that I could just pass up. The more I thought about it and justified it to myself the more it seemed that I'd made my decision, but it didn't make telling Cera and Gaucho and saying goodbye any easier.

"So... I guess I just wanted to tell you both goodbye." I frowned at the words then pressed on. "And... and that this isn't an easy decision because you're my family, too, and I love you both so much." I couldn't leave again and not say anything to them. They both deserved better than that. "I understand if you're upset with me... and I'm sorry." I murmured because I didn't know what else to say.

"."

in your heart you know what you must do
you've only got yourself to answer to
don't let fear of falling hold you down
your spirits flying high above the clouds