It is agony to see his darling girl's face crumpled and struck through with pain, and be incapable of touching and consoling her. Kaj has learned, since they discovered Aleta's revulsion of touch and contact, that comfort and love can be expressed in so many ways aside from the physical. But he was a creature of touch, himself. It was difficult to restrain himself sometimes, when all he wanted to do was let Aleta know that the world was not always so full of physical pain. That a gentle touch could bring comfort and serenity instead of a fire along her nerve endings. And as her expression screwed up and she began to sob, Kaj knew he would never in his life understand a deeper pain than what it felt like to see his baby girl crying her heart out, unable to draw her into his embrace or wipe away her tears. His own sprang forth, silent things that depicted his torture. 

Her words tumbled out, shattered and uncoordinated, and Kaj felt the knife twist deeper in his aching heart. He had suspected Sohalia had returned to the Throat, and he was not so blind or desperately hopeful to think Aleta would not be impacted by her absence. He had tried. Gods, he had tried to be enough for Aleta. It was not fair to either of them, but Kaj had done as much as he conceivably could to fill the void Sohalia would inevitably leave in Aleta's life by living so far away. But Kaj was only so big, and he could not fill both the space of a father and a mother, no matter how he tried. No matter how he always would try, for the sake of his daughter. But knowing that Sohalia had another family, maybe even a mate, children and siblings both he and Aleta had never known about...it hurt Kaj as much as it must hurt Aleta. 

Why had she never told them? They could have explained this to Aleta together, spared her the pain of having gone on a journey and finding out entirely on her own. They could have kept her from feeling abandoned, replaced. And he despairs, because his loyalty is to his daughter above anything else. Everyone else. And he wants to be upset with Sohalia, but he can't muster the anger when he feels just as abandoned. They had never loved each other, not in the way that most mates loved each other. But they had been friends. Confidants. They had understood one another, and yet...

His own tears blur his vision, because he can't fix this. This is beyond his power, and his heart swells with vibrant grief that he could not spare his beloved daughter this realization. 

"Oh Aleta," he whispers, brow drawn tight with pain. He doesn't know what to say. He wants to say that he's there for her, even if Sohalia never returns, but as an adult - as her father - he cannot willingly turn her against her mother like that. Neither deserve that, and yet his own emotions make this part of parenting so difficult. "Aleta I...I know your mother may not live here any longer, and she may have a mate and other children in the Throat. But that does not mean she doesn't love you anymore, my angel," he said softly, breathing warm air across her forelock, tousling the pale strands in a sad attempt at trying to comfort her when he could not even touch her. 

"It's okay to be angry, and to be upset. She should have told us. But even if I had another daughter, would I not still love you?" The Aurelight tried to catch her eyes, his own expression a sad form of sincerity. "I will always be here for you, my love. No matter what you decide to do. You don't have to get to know your other siblings, or see your mother for a while if you need time to think. But she loves you, Aleta. Sometimes we just...make mistakes, and hide away from saying the truth because we're scared." Kaj didn't know what else he could conceivably say to his daughter to make this better, without making her feel like he was siding against her somehow.