The expanse of her cavern felt empty with Thranduil's absence. She didn't know why she'd expected him to stay, as if his visit had somehow erased the decision he'd made when he'd descended the mountain to free her from her chains. But she felt the ache of his disappearance like a physical wound that could not be sutured. It nestled right alongside the hole that Ashamin's had left, and she mourned that her sin of loving more than one man had led to the fitting fate of being abandoned by both of them. Just as she was eternally left behind by her children, who disappeared into the frost like ice particles blown away on the northern wind. Reminding her of her failures as a mother, no matter how she tried to love and encourage them. Was this revenge as well? For despising her own mother when Phaedra had done nothing wrong? 

Hotaru's head dropped listlessly to press the soft expanse of her pale muzzle across the pendant on her chest. An intertwined, unending knot. It was as warm as her chest, silent on Thranduil's end. What did he feel, on the other end of the pendant? Were her emotions projecting through the pang of ice he would feel on his chest? Would he think of her, come to her, or would he simply sigh and ignore the silent call? 

Alice was keeping watch in the front of the cavern and even she could not rip Hotaru's mind from the doubts and worries that plagued her when her citizens could not see her weakness. There was no answer she could give. Alice did not know the heart of Thranduil or Ashamin, and could not help the crumbling kingdom Hotaru reigned over. It broke her heart to see her sister so torn apart, and it hurt worse to see her face each morning with a brave face and a flawless smile, hoping for change that wouldn't come. A cycle that Alice could not break, though she would in a heartbeat if only to shatter the chain it had become around Hotaru's neck. 

Ears perked as steps approached at a fast pace, and Hotaru lifted her face listlessly. Nobody but her closest friends and advisors would seek her out in her cavern, unless it was an emergency. There was no point in summoning her frigid countenance, not when she didn't have the energy to spare. But even in her downtrodden spirits, the Valkyrie smiled to see her elder sister trailing in through the grey-bright opening of the cavern. Though Hotaru was a Lady, and Raeden was not, she still looked to the golden girl as her older sister. Perhaps she could help ease the burden from her shoulders this evening. 

Alice licked at Tin's nose while the sisters greeted each other, Hotaru offering her smiling lips towards Raeden for their own reunion. "I've missed you too Rae," she confessed softly in turn, hating the miles and miles that kept them apart at all times. But she could not ask her sister to abandon everything she knew and loved just to come to the Basin with Hotaru. Just as she knew her sister would never ask the same of her in reverse. A deep sigh rattled through her chest as Raeden - who always knew Hotaru too well, who could see past any mask the Valkyrie composed ever since they were young fillies - immediately noticed her emotional state. 

"I've stupidly fallen for two stallions, both who have abandoned me. One who I had foals with. And this herd...well, while the Edge swells to bursting, the rest of the herds suffer in turn..." and she hoped Raeden would forgive her bitter tone, because she did not blame her sister for being part of the one herd that seemed to be doing well as of late. And she'd glossed over Thranduil and Ashamin, not wanting Raeden to really pry deeper because the wound was too fresh, the hurt too present to really talk about it. But Hotaru did laugh softly, eyes warm with fondness as she regarded her sister. "We both know I'm the fighter, Rae. Wouldn't want to get your pretty coat bloody, now would we? You're the beauty and I'm the brawn." And again she tried to hide her bitterness, years of feeling inadequate next to her sister rising up, issues she'd never really dealt with. Had never been able to deal with, with how Raeden had disappeared for years on end. 

And then the next question shattered her apart, and she stared in horror at her twin, who had spent so many years unaware of the fact that their parents had been murdered. "Oh Rae...oh Gods Rae I...I didn't know that you..." her voice was choked as her throat closed tight around each word, strangling her with the weight of the knowledge she held. And though she hadn't cried for them since the night she'd discovered their bodies, tears fell anew from her mismatched eyes as she relived it all over again. "Raeden...mom and dad...they were murdered by Gaucho when he was possessed by the Moon Goddess. They died together. The God of the Earth turned them into a tree in the Steppe..." tears fell down her cheeks as she whispered this news to her twin, and though she was grateful that - unlike millions of others who had lost their loved ones - she had a monument to visit to always remember her parents, it did nothing to lessen the burden of loss in her soul. One that Raeden would now have to carry as well. And Hotaru would never have wished that on her.

So sad ;-; @Raeden stupid tag