the more people you love
the weaker you are

Romina is overwhelmed.

She skitters away from Lyanna, despite the nod of reassurance, when the pale girl comes traipsing in. They are too familiar with one another, must hail from the same herd, her scientific mind coos comfortingly, but the child wars against it, pressured by how she stands alone. A solitary Basiner, with no allies to call her own, and a distraught newcomer in the Threshold. Breaths come fast in her small throat and she wants to scream for her brother - he's nearby, he has to be nearby, he never leaves me alone I made sure of it - but she holds onto her composure with iron will. Not that she displays it well, with her convulsing throat and darting eyes betraying her. Why had she ever come her again without Kiada?

The only thing she can rely on is her logical brain, which looks at Yael's shivering bodice and clicks words straight into her mouth without thought.

"Maybe the other herds would be better for you. The Edge and the Basin are very cold, you don't seem to like it," and her words fade as preference and emotion come into play, suddenly unsure of herself with all these older mares around her. She feels foolish, and she hates feeling foolish. Her cheeks are hot all the way up to her ears and for some reason she wants to shout at them, maybe even cry with the way her tears prick hot at the back of her eyes. But she refuses to let them see it and drops her head while the rest converse. Not sure if she should turn and leave or if that was considered impolite. Holding onto her facade with white-knuckled fingers, her entire axis shattered leaving her careening into space with no idea what happened.

She's so off centered that when the younger white mare speaks her answer comes on a hot trail across her tongue, almost spat from between her teeth. "No!" It's far too hysterical and she swallows unsteadily and lifts her head high, ignoring how the flames have returned to her antlers to signify her pervasive distress. They don't know what it means. She has to tell herself that. Tries to remember her mother's cold, glacial face and imitates it as best she can. Mimicry is her strongest trait, after all. "T-Thank you but no. Mother wouldn't be happy if I did." Never call her Mama in front of others. It's a sign of weakness. She is a Lady, you must not betray her title with your sentiments, her mind croons, and it's a comfort that slightly relaxes the tension in her shoulders. Something reliable, something safe and familiar. Logic that cannot be conquered.

Again she ducks her head in silence, wanting to turn and run back into the shadows to Ru'in where she belongs. Where her world doesn't shake and her breath doesn't come fast and hard. Panic, her mind supplies, suddenly traitorous. Defenseless. Prey face to face with a predator. Fight or flight response. Elevated pulse, desire to flee, high emotional response. And she wants to cry because knowing it doesn't make it any better, any easier to deal with.

"...you?"

Tiny skull jerks at the question, registering it as being directed towards her, and she lifts her eyes enough to see the golden bird once more. "Romina," she offers softly. But it's time to go now, and she won't break any social niceties by doing so. Glances around nervously and retreats a few steps. "I-I should go. Travel safe." And she turns and walks quickly back into the woods, breath spinning out of control and breaking into a sprint the moment she fades from view. She needs to find her brother.

Romina