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P s y c h e | V a l e n t i n e
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By my verdict PSYCHE is the winner.
PSYCHE -- post 1 (attack only)
[Realism]
+ 1| Attack: horn to shoulder
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy read
VALENTINE -- post 1
[Realism]
- 1| Defense: being sliced by a horn in the first attack, when she gave you warning and she directly headed towards you is an attack that could have easily been fully avoided. The injury description was also not specific enough.
- 1| Attack: You do not explain what you are attacking with
+ 1| Attack: weight ram
[Prose]
0| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy read
PSYCHE -- post 2
[Realism]
+ 1| Defense: dodges flank attack
+ 1| Defense: dodges ram
0| Attack: feint - be sure to specify what you are attacking with, just saying you dropped your maw isn’t enough.
+ 1| Attack: bite at neck
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy read
VALENTINE -- post 2
[Realism]
+ 1| Defense: fooled by feint
0| Defense: bite grazes him – specify further the injury, is he bleeding, did it hurt, etc.
0| Attack: horn attack – this attack was confusing and I’m not sure how he is positioned relative to her or what side of her he is attacking. What does using the ground mean?
[Prose]
- 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
- 1| Easy read
PSYCHE -- post 3
[Realism]
0| Defense: scraped by horn – needs more injury description
+ 1| Attack: bucks out
+ 1| Attack: ram – unlikely she’d push him over unless he wasn’t on all four feet during the impact, horses have pretty good balance and I wouldn’t say she has the sheer weight to just knock him over, not many horses would.
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy read
VALENTINE -- post 3
[Realism]
- 1| Defense: rolling away from buck – a horse would never willingly get on the ground much less roll on the ground to evade something, they are very exposed, slow and ungraceful on the ground in this manner. It’s also not realistic timing wise he would have completely avoided the buck. Best bet int his scenario would have been having it avoid your head and it hits your neck, chest, shoulders or side.
- 1| Defense: charging at her was a good idea, but no mention of injury sustained and I don’t see how his forehand would be up but his hind end down if they hit head on.
[Prose]
- 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
- 1| Easy read
PSYCHE -- post 4
[Realism]
0 | Defense: collision – like the breath taking part but no other description of injury, there’d be lots of bruising.
+ 1| Attack: nip at haunch
+ 1| Attack: buck at shoulder
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy read
VALENTINE -- post 4
[Realism]
0 | Defense: bitten – again more description. You say flesh tore but what does that mean.
- 1| Defense: you acknowledge the buck but don’t say if it landed or not…
- 1| Attack: her face is away from him, and even more so if he turns around to kick out.
- 1| Attack: turning right even more would only lead him even further away from her shoulder.
- 1| Powerplay: “He then turned right again and landed another kick” – saying landed implies that he hit Psyche, that is her decision to make.
[Prose]
0| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
0| Easy read
PSYCHE -- post 5 (defense only)
[Realism]
+ 1| Defense: dodge head kick
+ 1| Defense: take shoulder kick
PSYCHE
[Bonus]
+ 1| Surroundings
+ 1| Health
[Injuries]
None.
[Creativity]
+ 1| I loved the rock weaving!
Comments: I love how well your incorporated her thoughts, personality and motive for everything all throughout the post, I always sensed Psyche the whole fight and felt inside her head. You did good utilizing your surroundings, but don’t forget about breed differences of similarities! You have a very good grasp on the mechanics of fighting and everything was easily understood. Your biggest thing to work on is describing your injuries better and how they will affect you throughout the fight (even if that is no effect), but otherwise you did great.
VALENTINE
[Bonus]
None.
[Injuries]
None.
[Creativity]
None.
Comments: You had some good ideas of how to tackle horse fighting, but I think perhaps you could benefit with reading old fight threads and looking at horses fighting in real life/video because some of your timing, positioning and mechanics, like balance, weren’t correct. Remember to utilize your surroundings and the breed differences between you and your opponent more during a fight. It’s also incredibly important to add emotion to the fight. A lot of your posts were incredibly short and felt very rushed, as I’ve read other posts by you and know you have greater potential, so it felt as if you weren’t completely applying yourself to this and it showed in your posts. So to improve research a bit more about how horse fighting works and be a bit more detailed and descriptive, especially with your attacks and injuries sustained as well as your emotion.
TOTAL
PSYCHE - 75
VALENTINE - 45
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(Judge Please) Preparing for Battle (Psyche)
