cassiopeia
Being open with myself; that is the point in which I am stuck and cannot move further.
Sometimes it's a harrowing endeavor - expressing your emotions to another. For someone who was so puzzled by them herself, Cassiopeia hated sharing her thoughts as a child. Her mind was often immersed in a bout of utter chaos and the frustration of her incommunicative nature often only made matters worse. She beheld a masterly ability to disguise her emotions, which allowed her to execute her duties as Oracle with miraculous ease and finesse, but silence could only go so far. When she found she could confide in her mother and sister, only then did her thoughts take on a sedative effect: peace. Talking can work wonders. "It's something that is learned with time." She replied in a reassuring tone of voice. Rowan seemed to be rather intelligent. Intellect, it would seem, has a sort of burdening impression. With knowledge there comes indecision and an insatiable thirst.
Cassiopeia recalled a wise man once telling her: "For in much wisdom is much vexation and he who increases knowledge likewise increases sorrow." This man was none other than her beloved father. Briefly she remembered being small, her bright eyes aglitter with admiration as she gazed so lovingly toward the man who had raised her. His dark figure was like a beacon of strength and love; of power, security and of all the unhindered affection and devotion of a father. He was the embodiment of all a fine warrior should be; she a living effigy of fragility and the unsullied beauty of youth - what a lovely contradiction.
Oh how she missed him. His words hadn't meant much to her then, but time has a way of changing things. "Simply by divulging such musings to me, you are allowing yourself to open up." She gazed down into the water and at the reflection that manifested flawlessly across its sleek surface. She seemed only half aware of the mare beside her as she was swiftly plunged into the churning waters of her mind. "However small a step it may be, every stride, no matter how meager it may seem, is progress. By sharing your thoughts and emotions with another you are easing the burden on yourself. Most often than not, those closest to you are more than willing to listen if only they know when their audience is needed."
The star breather laughed faintly at Rowan's metaphor, though only in mirthful agreement. 'A burn with no ointment.' What a befitting comparison. "I'd like to think everything is a blessing in some form, even things that may seem immediately afflictive or painful." Every moment in life provides a new lesson to be learned. Every mistake, no matter how minor, extends to us a meaningful teaching. "What you see as a conflicted blessing is only such because you allow it to be that way. You are the steward of your own thoughts. We cannot always control what ideas appear within our minds but we can push unpleasant or recurring thoughts away. You must not let them gain dominion over you." Cassiopeia was far from perfect. She too fell victim to the woes of her mind every now and again. But it is not our faulty pieces that define us - it is how we deal with the things that make us vulnerable and how we get past them.
It takes years I've yet to experience off my shoulders. "It's amazing the wonders mere talking can do." She said with a smile, then listened as Rowan spoke once again. "Rowan, I only appear that way because I have come to accept uncertainty. I am no more certain of who I am than you. I feel as though if everyone understood themselves, then life's true allure would be lost. There would be no reason to go on, I suppose. Each day I learn more about myself than I knew the last, and that makes life refreshing in a way." She did not speak any farther on the subject, instead allowing it to soak it. Tiredness was beginning to make her eyes grow heavy and therefore she decided it was time to return to her family. "If ever you seek my guidance Rowan, you need only ask. Do not hesitate. I am more than willing to help."
"For now, however, I must go. Sleep beckons me." A smile cracked across her lips. She moved a few half steps away from the lake. "Rowan, it was truly a pleasure to meet you," she averred with a dip of her head. "Until next time."
[ ooc ; Sorry if it seems a bit too abrupt at the end. I might add a few things thought wise tomorrow, but I really just wanted to get this done and posted. ]
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Give Me the Gift of Sight [Cassiopeia]
