It is hard to trust Zikar-Sin with this information, but he also feels a desperate desire to have the stallion believe him. Tolio could easily be tortured, killed, exiled for the words he had just spoken. Yet the deeper, darker part of him is screaming in rage. It is a child of Psyche, a creature born by anger and injustice. It tears its way out of his ribcage and up around his throat, screeching at him to let it free. It will not allow this injustice against its Lady. Tolio whimpers pitifully and clenched his eyes shut. It is so painful trying to decide between the sides of himself. Zikar-Sin momentarily fades away and he’s twitching slightly, fighting against it, but he knows he cannot win. He doesn’t succumb, but he is forced to speak. ”Don’t get me wrong…Psyche is a wonderful Lady. I am not disloyal to the Basin. I would fight for her if she so much as commanded me, do you understand?” Desperation laces his visage as he turns to Zikar-Sin. Conflicting emotions swirl in his orbs, fighting each other. ”It is like a parent being with you for your entire life, and then someone else steps in to replace them, calling themselves by the same name. It’s…it’s hard for me, Sinny…” voice breaking softly, honesty coating every tone. ”Psyche…she took me in and helped me when I was at my lowest. I support her, but I still am too loyal to Mauja. What do I do? How can I give up hope on my King? That would be the worst thing I could ever do. Yet…Psyche was the one who saved his group, who saved me. It’s…conflicting,” he managed to whimper out, feeling pathetic and weak. He had torn loyalties, it was true, but he was also bonded far stronger to Mauja than Psyche.

Tolio sucked in a breath weakly, composing himself. Blinking up at Zikar-Sin when his name was stuttered, and the look on his face nearly crushed his heart. He didn’t understand the emotion on his face and yet felt as if he had done something terribly wrong and had hurt the adorable fumbling brute in some way. Face fell momentarily, thinking he had done something wrong that he didn’t understand. At last he spoke and Tolio felt his face and chest warm at the affectionate nickname. Was it affectionate? Tolio secretly hoped so, and chided himself for thinking that. ”He is. But…maybe he’s not an ‘is’ anymore…maybe I should move on, fully support our Empress…it won’t be a massive change, she is still my Lady even if Mauja will always be my King.” Sighing and resigning himself to that. Secretly he still hoped that the icy king would return, but was starting to doubt himself. Snow was thinning yet air never stopped moving into colder temperatures. Tolio peered through the thinning snow and found himself blinking stupidly. Was that the ocean?! He turned to look at Zikar-Sin with wide, surprised eyes. ”Can we…can we not talk about this? It makes me feel conflicted.” Eyes and face working together to beg him to leave the topic they were on. Nudging his shoulder very gently against the darker expanse of Zikar-Sin’s, trotting ahead on lanky legs towards the glittering ocean that looked far different in comparison to the one that stretched around the beach in the south he visited so often. Eager to explore he turned his head towards the other stallion, smiling and giggling excitedly. ”Come on Sinny! Doesn’t it look interesting?” Secretly storing away the ‘Lio’ he’d let slip out, despite the dejected tone he’d said it in. Nobody had called him that before. Silver irises beckoned him, returning to his happy self as he encouraged the other into exploring this new stretch of sea water that so entranced him.