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02-15-2013, 12:55 AM
 I shook from the weight of a sudden blow to my heart. The world spun mercilessly around me before settling into a deadpanned silence. Breath had been robbed from my chest and words were soon to follow. I merely stared at my brother, wondering how he knew this, how he could have waited so long to tell me. The anger that raged inside was gruesome. He had had a million chances to find me, to tell me of her passing and yet he hadn’t. I strained a furious gaze upon him, choosing instead to remain silent. He had as much time in the world to tell me and only now did he find it so important. He had wasted as much on time spent with Angora, surely fucking her brains out with this brewing in the back of his mind. Was it a heavy burden to carry around news of death? Or did he find it easily forgotten in moments when fucking pleasure overwhelmed?
I turned from him, my eyes burning both from tears and anger. But the maddening sense of distrust won out over all. “How could you?” My voice cracked from the lump in my throat before I could break through the barriers of my own self-destruction to spit upon his selfish attempt to spare me. “You’ve had plenty of time to find me, to tell me of this tragedy and yet, here you stand, months of living in and learning to call Helovia your home, without a fucking word.” I cringed at the hardened sound of my voice, never used within these borders, never used to express emotion and certainly not used to reprimand my own fucking brother for not telling me that my mother had died- DIED. Did age really matter now that he had pressed the misery of death into my palms to be counted as some shitty version of small talk? I fumed before throwing my neck up and outwards, a display that I knew he would find disheartening. I was pissed beyond belief and I would be dammed if he walked away unscathed. Brotherly love... what bullshit. I affixed him with a glare now, both guarded and hateful, filling to the brim with tears unshed. “You selfish little fuck. Did it not dawn on you that this was something that should have been taken care of before you took that time to lie with Angora? I’ve spent years wondering, hoping that she would find me again. But no, it was you who found me, who disrespected me and used my hospitality against me. Was it jealousy that pushed you to disarm me like this? I could only imagine it true, now that I’ve risen above you, claimed happiness for my own. Maybe one day you will understand the meaning of family, but it’s obvious that even the Gods don’t believe your time is now.” I had used rumination to land my final blow. I had heard through the trees that his child had been born still, no breath to speak of from brand new lungs. I stood before him, bristling with rage and wondering how exactly I had been able to use that cheap shot against him. It was not my nature to hurt and destroy, but he had perfected his aim and gone straight to my heart. “A family keeps nothing from one another as I’ve found in my time here, but you Loki, have kept much from me. We are family no longer.” |
