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G a u c h o | N o t e
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By my verdict GAUCHO is the winner.
Gaucho has been awarded one VP and has earned the battle buff Bulk. Now that you have more than two buffs, be sure to specify which you are using during spars.
GAUCHO -- post 1 (attack only)
[Realism]
+ 1| Attack: windstorm directed toward Note.
+ 1| Attack: directing his antlers toward Note's side.
+ 1| Attack: Throwing his shoulder toward Note's left shoulder.
+ 1| Attack: Bucking as he runs by toward Note's left hip.
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Ease of Read
NOTE -- post 1
[Realism]
+ 1| Injury: Not sure if this should be listed as injury, but eh. Realistic response to the windstorm.
- 1| Defense: Rearing when a much larger opponent is charging is never a smart idea. Horses are very easily unbalanced while rearing.
+ 1| Defense/Attack: kicking at Gaucho's neck to redirect his horns.
0 | Injury: no mention if the horns scrape or miss entirely specified. I am assuming this was because you did not want to powerplay your opponent, so I won't count off. You have to state it, however, for future note.
- 1| Dropped attack: no mention of Gaucho's shoulder bash.
+ 1| Defense: turning away from Gaucho's hooves.
+ 1| Attack: Biting at Gaucho's hocks. I'm really not a fan of biting at kicking legs, but if you are going to go for it anywhere, the hock is the best place.
- 1| Injury: ITS ONLY A FLESH WOUND. Ahem. I am not sure how you can bite at Gaucho's hock and have his kick just hit Note's stifle, unless Note is bent in half. Good mention of pain and injury description, but look at the anatomy!
+ 1| Attack: Lightning toward Gaucho's spine. I liked that you mentioned the background lightning to bring this about.
[Prose]
0| Emotion: very dry and mechanical.
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy Read
GAUCHO -- post 2
[Realism]
+ 1| Injury: Blood blisters on the neck from Note's hooves.
+ 1| Defense: Tail whip.
- 1| Injury: Failure to mention whether or not Note's bite lands.
- 1| Position: You do not mention turning, only "righting" Gaucho, and Note is in front of him suddenly.
+ 1| Injury: Realistic shooting of pain and numbness from the lightning. I would have liked to see his vision affected for a few moments and his movements made jerky, but I can hang.
+ 1| Attack: Sandwiching Note between mist bear and launching himself toward Note's body.
+ 1| Attack: Bear swipes out at Note's back legs.
+ 1| Attack: Biting at Note's neck.
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion
0| Flow: The first part mentions how Gaucho's attacks miss, but then you correct and say that it hits a stifle after some jumbling of words. Ultimately, this knocked the flow of your post and did not make logical sense.
+ 1| Easy Read
NOTE -- post 2
[Realism]
0| I didn't feel like counting off for this because it didn't directly affect your opponent, but there was only one bear. Be sure to read carefully!
+ 1| Injury: Gash from Gaucho's horns.
- 1| Defense: Rearing when you are being knocked into, as I stated earlier, is unwise. Note could easily be knocked over by a much larger opponent like Gaucho.
+ 1| Injury: cut from Gaucho's hooves.
+ 1| Defense: Bucking toward Gaucho to avoid the swipe of the bear and Gaucho's bite. You didn't mention aim, but in the harried situation and considering he is trying to avoid a bear swipe I find that more or less realistic.
- 1| Attack: Lunging at Gaucho's flank. This was a good enough idea for an attack, but Note had just finished bucking at Gaucho, and you make no mention of turning toward his body, so simply moving forward would be taking you -away- from him, not toward him.
+ 1| Attack: foreleg kick toward Gaucho's elbow; "as it was the only place on this huge horse he could reach at this point" was really cute. xD
+ 1| Attack: Throwing his body at Gaucho's shoulder.
- 1| Attack: biting at Gaucho's flank in this instance would be going backwards. You cannot be moving forward and backward at the same time.
[Prose]
+ 1| Emotion was better.
+ 1| Flow
+ 1| Easy Read
GAUCHO -- post 3 (defense only)
[Realism]
+ 1| Injury: Return of the lightning!
0 | Defense: Kick to the belly instead of a leg. No mention of the extent of the injury.
- 1| Injury: Disobeying the laws of physics. Momentum decreases proportionally with distance. His slam to the shoulder caused by Gaucho's stagger would therefore be less powerful, but you state it as an increase.
+ 1| Injury: Bite to the flank.
GAUCHO
[Bonus]
0 | Breed comparison: While you compare the two, at one point in this fight Gaucho is also confused by Note's speed. Since you did not have a swift buff during this time, Note would be considerably more lithe and nimble than Gaucho, so I cannot award the point.
[Injuries]
None.
[Creativity]
Nothing of note.
Comments: Review the basic laws of momentum! I don't like them being broken. Otherwise, you should a good understanding of time frames, though I have noticed in your fights that you tend to pack a lot of punch in a small amount of time. There is nothing wrong with lots of attacks, but it is typically wiser not to have your posts span such a large amount of time, as you allow your opponent more room to evade and manipulate. Be careful to be explicitly clear with movements, not just for your opponent, but for me, your lovely judge who reads these. Awesome job! Love seeing your growth.
NOTE
[Bonus]
+ 1| Breed comparison.
[Injuries]
None.
[Creativity]
+ 1| Having the lightning spur his use of his magic was pretty creative, and it also helped close the gap of his logic.
Comments: If you take anything away from this fight it is to learn horse anatomy and balance. Rearing severely unbalances horses, and doing this against a larger opponent who is throwing themselves at you will end with your character in the dirt, realistically. Be very careful about anatomy and direction of movement, as you made some very common rookie mistakes during this fight that I think can be easily avoided. Draw it out, map it out, do whatever you can to make sure you are responding accurately and realistically. Otherwise, work on emotion. The rest of this was good!
TOTAL
Gaucho - 64
Note - 61
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[COMPLETE] dressed to fight, gaucho
