She had been on my mind since the spar. I wondered where she had ended up since our last meeting and the inevitable conception of our child. I was so proud, so clearly elated to hear of her pregnancy and induction into the Edge. However, when the day came, I wasn’t sure how to feel. Her scent was intoxicating enough to leave a valid path into the Forest, though I wondered why she had come so far to give life. I worried that she did not feel at home with me, worried that she did not know of her feelings and perhaps she didn’t. But we had more pressing matters to attend to. I was more than eager to be at her side despite the unknowing. I didn’t even know if she wanted me at her side to witness our child come into the world. Would she have told me if she didn’t? Was it something that was decided at the last minute when she had no time left to inform me? My heart sank at the idea that I was not wanted, not deserved. With a swell of emotions I followed her from our home and into the shadows of the forest.

I did not rush immediately to her side, fear and insecurity keeping me at bay. However, from the shade did I watch her give the final push that welcomed our beautiful daughter into Helovia. My chest seemed to expand and my heart broke into a million pieces. I wanted to run to her, tell her she had done so well, and assure her that she was safe… But I could not. It had been a month since I had last seen her, a long month full of agony without her by my side. It had been a whole month since I had been able to see those beautiful eyes open into mine and my uncertainty was sure to take hold of my actions before turning me away entirely. I retreated back through the woods, my hooves seemingly made of metal and they yearned to turn back and go to her. For a time, I circled back and forth, to and fro. I searched those damn woods for something, anything that would tell me what to do.

Finally, I gave into myself. I wanted to find out what disarmed her but there was nothing I could do. This wasn’t about us anymore; this was about the tiny child that she cradled in her warm embrace upon my return. Her face was something out of a fairytale riddled in beauty powerful enough to knock me to my knees. When I finally had the nerve to emerge from the tree line, I nodded to the one I loved and then turned my gaze towards the little piece of myself that had come from two hearts to form one. “She’s beautiful Tamira.” My voice was stale and broken as if somehow I had let her down. Had I done that? Had I turned her away from me?

I stepped closer to lower my velvety muzzle to the small filly before nuzzling her sweetly, puffing softly and allowing her to see me as I saw her- family. I would not leave this child if death were upon me. I would fight through any pain in order to see her safe. It was instant, an impact that only a father and mother would know of. In that moment I knew that there was nothing more important than the wobbling little piece of paradise that rose onto new legs before me. Everything about her spoke of innocence. She was an angel much like her mother and I would never see her as anything but. However, my heart still throbbed and I wondered if tears would come after I found myself in the isolation of being denied her touch. What was it that I felt? Everything was so mixed up and thrown around.

“Essetia.” I had no doubt in my mind that the name would be more than fitting, but a curios glance was tossed upon Tamira, wondering briefly if she would like it as well. Again my voice sounded devoid of any real emotion. I didn’t want her to hear the hurt that thrived within me; I didn’t want her to mistake my love for uncertainty. But perhaps that’s what it was? Maybe I wasn’t sure what existed between us… Maybe I had lived in some fairytale for too long. I looked down into the wide eyes of my darling daughter and for the first time since I’d seen the pair, I smiled. She was quickly becoming my world, replacing whatever reservations I held about her mother. I knew that I would find faith in her love, find certainty in her existence. Everything else would come after. Of that I was sure.

Thor