At first, the sign of the ghost had warmed her, cooled her worries and calmed her, eased her cream face into one of her lovely, warm smiles that seemed to glow from the very bottom of her heart, seemed to make the air hot around her with her adoration and care. So relieved she was her eyes skipped over the rage in the pale ghost’s eyes. So when the unicorn spoke, crass and uncaring, she froze. Her mouth literally hung open for a moment, the smile slowing sliding off her care, dropping onto the cold ground and shattering there. With every word her hopes, sincere as could be, were crushed, alongside her heart. Nothing could’ve prepared her for the cold, hard, and furious words aimed at her.
Tor could never recall not being cared for. What had she done for this mare so wrong? Yes, she had been irresponsible. She had been a fool. But to talk to selfishness to her? She had left for family! Was that truly so wrong? Here she came, back, and yes she had been an idiot for promising the Edge shallow oaths. Maybe she was in the wrong the whole time… but the Edge had treated her kindly enough. It was unusual for Tor to raise her voice, and even more unusual for her to feel a burning sensation in her gut. Anger. No, it was not unusual to feel anger- it was unusual to reciprocate the feeling to another. Perhaps, Tor thought in the clouded areas between fury and tears, it was just the rain making her eyes mist. Mostly, she had screwed herself, she was well aware. There was little for her but family now. Here she was, trying to make amends… and she had been refused, cast back away.
For a long moment she stood, dripping, cold, and yet heated inside, uncertain whether to cast away the rage or begin what would surely become a yelling match.
Then the pearl mare spoke.
“Ophelia, I have wronged you. I have broken our friendship. But I do not believe that, if you do. I think of you as sister- I love you as family. Families argue. Sometimes, families split and families do not visit each other any longer. But they are still herd!” Tor’s voice was surprisingly calm, despite the chaos she felt inside herself, growing and growing stronger with passing moments. One might think it even bordered on cool. She inhaled, and continued on- “I am a fool and an idiot. I am irresponsible and have many faults. I – make – mistakes. Would you abandon Ktulu if she rejoined a herd? Would you shun her and not forgive her? I know she would not be such a damn idiot in the beginning- but don’t you understand how sorry I am?” Another pause as the mare collected her thoughts. “I am a simpleton, sometimes- most of the time- but I beg of you to reconsider, to put this behind you. Search my memories and you will find I was searching for you the whole of Frostfall. Search and you will find in the company of my family I missed you like a unicorn speared me through the heart. Search and you will find I never stopped thinking of you.” Now the mare was building steam, rushing on forward, the words coming out of her like a torrent.
“I – will – not – leave. Not until we figure this out. I will not let you leave, in a hundred years if that’s what it takes. You know I am often promising too many things. No longer. Give me this chance Ophelia, to prove myself. I will do anything for you. I am a healer, and you know the Gray needs a healer. Please.” Let her understand! Gods above and below! It would be hard, very hard, to gain the trust of the Gray again. But she would, if she could. If not… she awaited life as an outcast. No more promises to break, no more traitorous moves. Peace and quiet, loyalty to only family. Whoever that family might be.
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