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10-03-2013, 11:54 AM
 calmness is the cradle of power You were the first one to leave me but you were far from the last one. After you left Hototo followed you and it hurt, but at least I got to tell him goodbye and make him promise to come see me even if he didn't. He was busy, I understand, so its no big deal. But you just left. You left without telling me goodbye. I had thought we were closer than that. I had thought that you were my sister-cousin-bestfriend. I guess it wouldn't be the first time I found out I was wrong. But anyways. Momma left, too, but I got to tell her goodbye. I could have left to go with her if I wanted to, but I decided to stay in the Foothills in case you decided to come back, but you never did. At least I still had Bear hanging around so it made the separation from Momma a little easier. I was angry with you for a long time after you disappeared, I'll admit. Being angry was easier than being sad, but eventually the anger fades and the sadness hits you squarely in the chest and makes every breath painful. The sadness never completely goes away, it just kind of fades so it doesn't hurt so much to live without someone you love, but its still there. You're still there, always in the back of my mind. I always wondered what you were up to. If you'd gotten your horn stuck in anymore trees. How tall you'd gotten. If you'd even remember me when you saw me. I've grown up a lot since you left, Ros. I'm not a baby anymore. I've gotten taller, my hair's gotten longer, but its still tipped with gold. My horn's grown longer and stronger over the months. The markings on my shoulders have gotten darker and are more prominent. And my wings feel like they've tripled in size, though I still haven't learned how to fly yet. I still walk or run wherever I want to go or wherever my legs happen to take me. This time they took me to the dark forest and I recognized Momma's smell right away. Momma and Bear. I missed them, but I knew where they were and I knew that I could see them whenever I wanted so it didn't hurt so much. Not like it hurt when you disappeared. I drifted through the forest, just looking at the trees, amazed at how tall they were. I don't know how far I had gone into the forest when I finally smelled you. I thought my mind was playing tricks on me because why, after months, did I smell you? That old ache in my heart that came from missing you felt like it doubled. I can honestly say that I felt like crying and began wanting nothing more than to run from the forest and never look back. But my legs wouldn't listen to me. They kept carrying me through the trees, around them, under branches, through bushes and briar patches. Then I saw you and they stopped. I stood staring at you as you grazed, feeling like the minutes were both dragging by and speeding past. I was scared to blink. Scared that if I did you would suddenly be gone and I'd be left hurting again. My mouth opened and closed and I swallowed and continued to stare. I don't know how much time passed before I finally spoke. "Ros." It was the first time I said your name since you left. @[Roskuld]  |
aud pixel!
