d'Artagnan was not by any means prepared for Kou's reaction, conflicts were rare in their relationship and even then they were nothing large scale, even his dishonesty with the Moon Goddess was nothing quite compared to this. It seemed he was now passed the point of return as her ears slid back and her expression contorted into something that truly frightened the shade. He had always known he was a failure to her, for some reason, it was even worse when she confronted him. The more her voice became angered the more his blood boiled and the bile rose, a clever horse would now be on his knees begging for forgiveness, but d'Artagnan was never and could never be described as 'normal'. Bloodied ears mirrored his Nurse and fell back, his mismatched eyes becoming hard with the sound of his heart thundering loud in his mind. He hated fighting with her. The words she threw at him were like whip lashes, a once simmering fire now out of control, but he allowed himself a brief moment to take relief that both his sons were indeed alive and well.

"I had no idea you'd been captured, by the time I did Psyche was marching us the full breadth of Helovia to fight the Throat rats." He paused, choosing to skirt around the fact he had lost too a mere baby in combat, he didn't need another thing for her to throw at him. Swallowing, he finally got to the hard part "when we made it back to the Basin I renounced my rank and came looking for you... So here we are." His voice was hard, his lips pressed together now in a grim line, he had absolutely no idea how she was going to take the new information in. He was no longer Time Mender, he had no herd and the only title he had was the one he'd earned through notoriety. He could no longer protect them in the confines of a safe place, he was an outcast with no solid home. The reason for him leaving the Basin was of his own wishes too, he had never taken her or their children into consideration and for that, he was guilty.

"I also thought marching straight into the Worlds Edge would only worsen your situation. Don't think I didn't want to... I did after all kill one of their members" he added quietly, even the Nightshade knew he couldn't take on a whole herd by himself and if they used Kou or his sons against him, he'd of lost there and then. They'd have him as a prisoner too, though for d'Artagnan's crimes against them, he was more likely to be put down than be kept. It was a situation where for once he had thought about it, perhaps he had been wrong, maybe Kou would have preferred him to fight and die trying to get them back than wait like a coward.

Right now, nobody hated the former Time Mender as much as he did himself.

He watched her carefully, the expression across her face enough to strike him like a real physical blow. "When did you start looking at me like that?"