This was anything but the reaction that she had been expecting. In reality she had been expecting something more on the lines of either complete lack of attention to her story or even boredom but to have some understanding? Things never ceased to surprise her rather sheltered opinions changing them for the better. Evolution some would call it, but she rather liked to think of it as adaptation to the wonderful realm in which gave them all life. Before sun came the harsh bitterness of the wind, ice and snow which in a way described not only the seasons but also the path of life. Things would always be bad one minute before relief would dawn for a millisecond before it would return to how things had been previously or at least similar to them. Maybe this was going to be the one time she got to experience something good in her life and have it carry through until death.

The apology was unexpected but somehow brought a small smile to her features helping to draw her back towards the light again. Really it made no sense as to why one such as Mauja would apologize given her circumstances were in no way his fault. Instead of commenting on it she let it slide without much of a fuss accepting that there were certain things she would never understand. " Somehow I survived through it, now its just a matter of trying to keep it from happening again. They say that time heals most wounds so I can only keep moving forward." She commented trying to sound positive almost as if she was trying to make herself believe it.

Moving on would be much easier if there were some way to get over the feeling of guilt and shame. Her child had been lost as a result of one such attack, she couldn't help but feel guilty for not being able to protect it from harm. While it had not been able to survive in the outside world yet she should have been capable of avoiding the situation or at least somehow defending herself. If only she had been gifted with this magic fire back then, it would have been able to protect them or at least given them a chance. Wasn't it strange that one minute the world destroyed all hope but the next sparked something that could have prevented the hope from dying.

Words once again fell from her mouth revealing the final pieces of the truth. " If it had not been for the death of my child I really don't know I would have wound up here. I wanted to let myself die along with my unborn child that day but something gave me the strength to find my feet again. Its been almost a year now since that day yet I still don't know what lifted me from that point. You probably think I sound stupid but its hard to explain.." Shaking her head to hide the moisture that had glazed her eyes at the memory she composed herself again quickly.

There finally her story had managed to be told to someone, in a way she regretted opening her big mouth but in the same sense she was glad it had happened. Usually it was only the voices in her own head that she would hear, hearing the words spoken aloud almost helped her feel a bit better.



TAGS: @[Mauja]
MUSE: Good
NOTES: Hope it makes sense, took awhile to write