Kahlua? She heard the sound, the way it fell off of Lena’s lips, the way it made the metal scorpion atop her head click and groan for no real reason. But she must have failed in her endeavor to sound helpless, to look lost and confused, for Lena did not look upon her with kindness or pity, she looked upon her with fear and horror. Yes, in death she had lost many things, but she had also won- she could read them, at least the fear they had when they looked at her. Disgust, terror, despisment. They hated her. And she found that she liked it. Run.

But then something different was happening. She was lunging, but Lena was…. Singing? A cold cackle escaped the girl’s lips. Singing at a time like this? Ulrik’s toy clicked and shifted as though agreeing with her. And to make matters worse her aim was off. Her barbed tail sunk into Imogen’s flesh, attacking the poor creature, but Kahlua felt no pity. Let her be damaged, let her take her pretty Lena down with her. Until…. Flames. The creature spit out flames with fury, with rage, like a tempest storm determined to beat down the earth. Flames meant to burn flesh, to cause pain and to incapacitate. And then something happened. Something she had not felt since death.

She felt fear.

Scurrying hooves sent her backwards, trying to evade the flames, but the Kitsune’s rage is too much. The flames ate at her forelimbs, the scent of scorched hair and then scorched flesh wafting up to her nostrils. And in the midst of the commotion she screamed. But no scream of evil- a scream of terror, a scream that said everything Lena’s face said moments ago. A scream of pain, anguish and memories so old they played back in black and white. Memories of her mother, her father, locked in their cathedral as the thing burned around them. Memories of her twin, whom she lost while everything was burning and had not seen since. Memories of death. And then a new memory- of Mauja.

“Mauja,” she screamed as she was falling backwards still, stepping over decaying grass and collapsing in a heap on the ground. She didn’t yet realize her tail was no longer that of a scorpion, her ribs had sunk back into her sides, her eyes had their pupils once more. Even the pincers on her face- gone. But she screamed his name anyways, because of all the creatures in Helovia she had met he was the one that knew she had this fear. Fire. And she knew that it was his too, and in sharing that secret she had screamed his name. But of course he would not be around to find her now. It was only instinct that made her yell.

As the fire died out before her, Kahlua suddenly realized that she felt. Felt the pain of the burns- pain she should not have been feeling in death, and suddenly it occurred to her, though she didn’t know how and couldn’t imagine at all, that she was better, alive, awake again. So she screamed a new name. “Lena!” Her voice was filled with anguish- heartbreak of the worst kind. What had she done? To Imogen, even. Dear sweet, Imogen, the laughing fox, one she would have called friend as much as Lena. And then she started shaking, the physical pain seeming insignificant to the mental pain. Because how many others had she lunged at the way she had lunged at her Bay friend here? Four, Five? A herdmate?! She shook, a terrible wreck suddenly, her voice coming out in choking, gasping sobs. “Oh, gods, Lena. What did I do?”

The passion was back in her voice as she lay on the ground, pitiful blue eyes looking up to Lena’s, searching for something there, though she did not know what. She was a child again, a babe on the ground, dead without a mother to care for her. How could she even live with herself?

In all the commotion, Nao's voice had been lost, but Kahlua could not bear to look at the girl now, even as she kept standing there, watching. Such an innocent young thing did not deserve the filth it seemed she carried inside of her.